Hi All,<BR>I'm playing hooky from work today. Working 2 jobs 6 days a week gets to be alot. Anyway I hope this post finds you all well.<P>I have a interesting story to tell you about my ex. It all started a few weeks ago when I went into a local bar with some friends and their he sat with his new wife. I said "Hi" and went on to sit with my friends and have a good time. I needed a ride back to my car later and a friend of mine who is a guy offered to give me a ride home. I took him up on the offer and left. My Ex hasn't ?'d me about this but has been calling or stopping buy every few days. Even when the kids arn't home he finds a excuse to come over. He really did a strange thing on Sunday. I was sitting in the living room, the boys were at a friends house. I heard someone come in the house and go into the basement to the family room. The dogs barked but quit so I just figured it was one of the boys. Pretty soon I see my oldest son ride by the window. A few minutes later I see my youngest son ride buy on his bike. My youngest son then came upstairs and asked me why his Dad was here. I couldn't believe it here he was sitting in my house and I didn't know it. It's not like it was ever his house. The kids and I moved out and he and his new wife and her kids live in what was our house. I went downstairs and asked him why he was here. He said he needed to get away for awhile. I asked him where his truck was he said he didn't want anyone to know where he was. Now I'm sorry but I feel that was really strange and as my son said kind of creepy. I didn't say anything to him as I didn't want to start anything in front of the kids but we are going to have a talk about this. He gave up his family for a new one. He met OW in July, moved out by August we were divorced in December and he married her in Feb. All happened way to fast and now I think he has major regrets. I know he is going through a MLC but I can't help in anymore. This is my house and he needs to relize that he no longer has any rights here. Am I wrong to feel this way. I encourage the kids to see him all of the time but they are teenagers and have their own lives now. I don't mind him coming over but to come and sit in my basement when I didn't know it! I hope he isn't here snooping around when we arn't home. I don't lock my doors because I'm afraid the kids will lose their keys and get locked out. Besides that my landlord has a body shop on the same lot and is there all day. I live in a town of 2000 so crime really isn't a problem. How do you think I should handle this? Do you think he is having regrets?<P>Sorry for the rambling post I just feel kind of confused right now as to what to do about him.<P>Jill <P>------------------<BR>live for today for there may not be a tomorrow

ROTFLMAO! at him!<P>Boundaries, Jill, boundaries.<P>Yes, you should be firm, but friendly, not a friend, in demeanor, and say that this is my house, and you need to call before coming over, or entering, etc.<P>If he is argumentative, have the portable phone handy, and<BR>be willing to dial the police. having it present and willing to use it would be a good enough deterrent.<P>you know, the more i read, the tougher i have become with MLC types, so that they face their own demise and possibly hit rock bottom with our help!<P>nice guys don't finish first all the time.<P>good luck!

Jill,<P>In the words of steve harley, "it looks like your X is failing his final exam!"<P>You know, i hope that my X lands in the same boat, and I suspect she will.<P>

WIFTT,<BR> I agree he is failing his final exam in fact I think he failed the whole course! I will talk to him about coming over when ever he feels like. I certainly don't walk right into his house. I honestly think he feels he has two wives as sick as it may seem. I have really tried to distance myself from him for my own sake. I haven't asked him for one thing the past 7 months. If something needs to be done I do it myself. That is something I'm pretty proud of. It's not easy working 2 jobs and raising three teenagers alone but I'm doing it and pretty well. Sure he tries to act like he is still the Dad in charge but he has lost alot of the kids respect and they pretty much consider what I say as law. <P>I guess if doesn't like my ground rules as far as my home not being a "second home" to him than he can just kiss my a**. I'm tired of worrying what he is going to say or think. I did enough of that for 17 years andn I've decided after your post I'm not going to do that anymore.<P>Jill<P>------------------<BR>live for today for there may not be a tomorrow

I agree!! Wow....that's too weird! <P>You're right about him "thinking" (thinking...c'mon who are we kidding!!) he has two wives. <P>You know him better than all of us...what was his demeanor when you first asked him what he was doing there? Did he appear depressed, upset or did you get the feeling he was snooping? Just wondered....<P>I would sure be interested in his response when you do ask/tell him he can't just do that....what was he thinking??<P>Again...that's just too weird...talk about not facing reality! Sounds like something a teenager would do...<P>Aloha,<BR>Mrs.O<BR>

Funny as hell. I just posted "The guilt just eats'em alive." Is this where my STBX WS wife is headed?<P>Thinking, my a**. They don't think. They behave just like teenagers. Me me me and I know everything.<P>It's just amazing how they crumble about the same time that you get your life put back together.<P>Kevin<BR>

As my X said, and I quote,<P>"THIS IS ALL ABOUT ME!"<P>

I was 11 when my family moved to within walking distance of my school. And I started carrying a key. There was a neighbor who also had one so, if something happened - like I forgot my key - I had someone to go to for help. I never had to. <P>Your story is too funny. Way to weird. I think maybe your children are old enough for a key.