Check out this e-mail I sent the OM this morning:<P>Kurt,<P> Just thought I would drop you a note to keep you<BR>abreast of what I know is STILL going on. I know you<BR>are still "seeing" my wife consistently, and although<BR>she says nothing is going on, I can feel that it is. <BR>How could I be wrong? I have been completely correct<BR>so far.<BR> I don't know if she has lied to you again, and said<BR>I have moved out of our house, filed for divorce, or<BR>whatever. I can assure you, I am still at home (I'm<BR>typing this on our computer). I have not filed for<BR>divorce, yet. <BR> I know Lilly is very confused right now about her<BR>future. She has told me some of the most ridiculous<BR>things the past few days. You know she is very<BR>immature, spontaneous and irresponsible. Taking<BR>advantage of her naitivity is not how a<BR>40-something-year-old man should act.<BR> Now, I believed her when she told me that you didn't<BR>know about me (before I caught her at your house). <BR>But now you know, and you continue this situation.<BR> My first inclination is to send an e-mail to the<BR>Secretary of State's e-mail address, which,<BR>ironically, is on the very same website you referred<BR>me to before I learned of Lilly's infidelity. But<BR>that would be jumping my chain-of-command, wouldn't<BR>it? No, I wouldn't want to do that. I could write my<BR>Congressman. No, I don't want to resort to such a<BR>drastic measure yet. I have a idea: why don't I go<BR>to my Platoon Sergeant, and report this situation to<BR>him? In turn, he will talk to my First Sergeant, who<BR>in turn will talk to my Company Commander. I'm sure<BR>one of them will know how to rectify this problem. If<BR>not, we could take it all the way to the Colonel, or<BR>General. Who knows where it will end?<BR> Or: you could end this now. If I were you, I would<BR>slowly make Lilly not want to see you anymore. Find a<BR>legitimate girlfriend, not one who has two children<BR>and a husband who still cares about her, albeit not in<BR>an intimate way anymore. I know Lilly might make you<BR>feel young again, but now it is time to act your age.<BR> Believe it or not, it is the last flame of care that<BR>I have for Lilly that makes me write this e-mail to<BR>you. I don't care if I ever have another intimate<BR>relationship with her again. I have always been the<BR>logical one in this relationship who looks down the<BR>road at the ramifications we have to face for our<BR>actions. Lilly has always been the one who does what<BR>feels good at the time with no thought of the<BR>consequences. Trust me Kurt, the consequences of this<BR>continuing relationship with you are dire.<BR> For one, Chandler is going to lose Lilly, and Matheo<BR>is going to lose me. I know that if this relationship<BR>with you continues, Lilly is going to have to go to<BR>Colombia and stay away. If it makes you happy to<BR>break up a family like this, continue seeing Lilly. I<BR>can see the pain Lilly is going to experience down the<BR>road, and she can't. She is only thinking about what<BR>feels right for her at this time, just like always.<BR> Now, I am not asking you to abruptly end it with<BR>her. I am giving you a week from today to come up<BR>with an excuse to stop seeing her. I don't know, tell<BR>her you have had a change of heart, that you feel it<BR>is wrong for a State Department employee to have a<BR>relationship with the spouse of a Department of<BR>Defense employee. Or, tell her that you see where<BR>this situation is heading and you don't want our<BR>children to suffer. <BR> Lilly will try to convince you to keep seeing her,<BR>because she is in a fantasy world right now, not at<BR>all grounded in reality. It is up to you to convince<BR>her that this can not continue, lover or friend.<BR> By the way, if you tell her about this e-mail or<BR>make it obvious I have contacted you, I will know. My<BR>intuition has been surprisingly astute the last few<BR>months. If I have the slightest feeling that you have<BR>not done the right thing, I will proceed with doing<BR>what I feel is right. <BR> Believe me, now I feel I have nothing to lose in<BR>regard to Lilly. She has given herself to another man<BR>and I don't think I could ever want her again. This<BR>is not the first time, did you know that Matheo is not<BR>my biological son? My good heart let Lilly back in<BR>the last time because, once again, I looked down the<BR>road and saw the trouble she was going to have in<BR>being with Chandler. Lilly has a lot of emotional<BR>problems that you probably have no idea of, but I do. <BR>You have only seen the good, sweet Lilly that I used<BR>to know. I still care about her, but I am not going<BR>to be made to look like a fool. I do have a lot of<BR>self-respect. Don't take this as a threat because it<BR>is not. It is just a request for you to do the right<BR>thing to save everyone involved a lot of trouble.<BR> I am saving this e-mail to you because I want to<BR>have a reference to show my Chain-of-Command to let<BR>them know that I exhausted every effort to do the<BR>right thing in this unfortunate situation. Now I<BR>implore you to do the same.<P>Jamie<P> By the way, I think the SOB told her about it because she called me (I could tell she was crying) and told me to wait for her at home. I told her I was about to drop the kids off at the babysitter's because I was going to work. She called me back a minute later and said to drop the kids off and come back home. I said "I have to go to work. Bye." That is the latest to this saga. I don't feel as if I have done anything wrong. I am now just a little afraid to go home after work tonight because if you have read my previous posts, you will see that my W is a little psychotic sometimes.

You have a forty year old man messing around with your wife? How old is your wife? My 23 year old wife is having an EA with a 42 year old man at her job. She's been living with her parents for 3 weeks now. She is head over heels for this guy who no doubt is promising the world, and my wife I would view as niave somewhat. I feel for you and think you letter was a good one. I talked to the OM in my situation for a short period and then he hung up. The whole time he played innocent, "we're just friends, I haven't promised anything, I have no intentions" I wanted to kill him. Keep your head up and stay strong.<P>FF63