My wife and I have been married for almost 6 years. During this time, I have had three short-term affairs. We were working on things, trying to reconcile the problems, and get our marriage back in order. Recently, our lives have forced us to a schedule in which we are not able to spend a lot of time together. I am a full time student, she is a part time student, and works full time. The time away from work and school is spent studying and doing homework. We do not have much 'us' time. <P>Just a few hours ago, she announced to me during an argument that she was going to file for a divorce tomorrow. This was precipitated by my lack of communication skills. I neglected to respond to a repair attempt that she made, and that convinced her that I was never going to change. I love her with all of my heart, and the last thing I want is to lose her. I do not know what I should do now. She said that she will not talk this over with me tomorrow, and is unwilling to lose any more sleep over the matter. <P>What should I do? I do not know where to turn. She is the only friend I have.

i really don't have any good advice for you at this time but i wanted to tell you that i read your post and i am very sorry that you are facing this. <P>i also wanted to bump this to the top so that someone else might read it and have a suggestion for you. God bless you. keep your head up and be encouraged...<P>kim...

You can't change her mind. <P>You can, however, read here and work on yourself. If you are a full-time student, there is probably some sort of counseling available to you through the school. It may be limited to school-related issues but, obviously, if your marriage is going down the tubes, your school life will be affected.<P>You also could check into a 12-step group that would help you deal with your sexual behavior. There are two that I can think of which deal with sexual addiction - SLAA (I think that is Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous) and SA (Sexaholics Anonymous). If you can't find a chapter in your area, contact AA and they may be able to give you a number to call for more information.<P>I can tell you that the telephone number for the international headquarters for SA is 615-331-6230. The international headquarters for SAnon (the corresponding group for co-addicts - similar to AlAnon) is 615-833-3152. <P>S-Anon is a family group for individuals who have a partner, close friend, or relative who exibits behaviors indicative of sexual addiction. The focus of the group is not to bash the addict but to help these people see that they do not have control over thee inappropriate behavior of the other person but that they do have contol over their reaction.<P>I have never been to an SA meeting. I know that they work very much as AA does. With regular meetings. Sponsors. 12-step accountability. And that they can help save lives and marriages.<P>If you have any chance of keeping your marriage intact and of regaining your wife's love, you have to start <B>now!!!!!</B> Read and post here on MB. You might find the infidelity boards helpful also. Sounds like you need to stop sharing your body and Plan A with all your heart and might. And you should probably pray hard too.