Hi man,<P>Just what the header said...what's been going on in your part of the world!<P>Love and light,<P>Jacky

Jacky,<P>A little update, huh? Well let’s see I’m now 3 months post-divorce and doing pretty well. Getting ready to move into a different smaller house, sell any nice vehicle I have, and basically down grade a little. Financially, the divorce was pretty devastating but I’ll pull through on that.<P>The girls are still struggling a bit. My oldest (12) usually a great student is struggling in school. Missing deadlines and just plain not doing some work. My middle child (9) is going through a mouthy stage probably born from anger. The baby (6) seems to be doing pretty well. I’m calling today to get the girls and I into some family counseling.<P>The X, well she’s just an idiot choosing to live a life that limits her time with the girls. Plus, she’s not disciplining, letting them get and do whatever, and basically going against everything that we’ve taught them. Hopefully, this will wear down quickly.<P>On the dating front, I am not dating and don’t plan on it for quite a while. As a matter of fact I’ve really had a problem with some close married female friends trying to pursue a relationship that was more than just friendly.<P>Thanks for asking.<P>Hugs, Thoughts, & PRayers<BR><P>------------------<BR>Love, Bill<P>-There are none so blind as those who refuse to see!-<BR>-Stand up and do the right thing, even if your standing alone.-

MARRIED female friends...oh JUST what you need!!!<P>I am getting my kids and I into counselling too, as soon as school starts next week.<P>I am having some problems with anger management from S, and grieving problems with D's. They are on the farm with PIL today, I pick them up tomorrow...I haven't known what to do with myself all day...I don't know how our WS's manage to overlook being involved with the kids. It leaves such a hole in your life.<P>BTW, any hints on how to brush girl's hair without them screaming the place down??? <P>Hey, what happened to the joke threads you used to start???<P>I looked forward to them.<P>Love and light,<P>Jacky<P>

1. I'll start my Jesterly Joking threads again real soon.<P>2. It's not only that she's limited her time but when sh'e with them she does things that are causing problems. So I don't know, I just talked her about one of them and it's like trying to talk to a wall. I really can't believe that the woman I loved has turned into this person. <P>3. As for the hair, to start with you can get the spray detangler. We used to use that a lot. Now I just make sure it's wet and start from the very bottom and work my way up.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>3. As for the hair, to start with you can get the spray detangler. We used to use that a lot. Now I just make sure it's wet and start from the very bottom and work my way up.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>such a good dad! <P>Nicole

I think I'm going to make a new rule in the house about the hair.<P>RULE #107a: All braiding shall be done in the evening....<P>All three of them decided they wanted beaded braids this morning, which looks cool. BUT, had I known last night this morning would of went a little better. We made it though and they all got there beads.

I bow to you, my man. A man who can do beaded braids. I am pretty good. I can braid and french braid and french braid on the outside but I can't bead braids. Tell me how, you marvelous man. <P>(You are right about the stray detangler and combing the ends first and working your way up the hair.)<P>Have you learned to do hair wraps yet?

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by cinderella:<BR><B>I bow to you, my man. A man who can do beaded braids. I am pretty good. I can braid and french braid and french braid on the outside but I can't bead braids. Tell me how, you marvelous man. <P>Have you learned to do hair wraps yet? </B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Maybe we're talking apples and oranges... I just take a small amount of hair, slide on 3 or 4 beads, then braid. Then braid holds those beads at the top and then I put a couple on the bottom before I put on the hair band.. It looks pretty cool, the best thing about it this morning is that I only had to do about 10 of them in each of theirs. Usually I do all their hair and that's between 25 - 35 braids per kid......<P>No hair wraps or french braids. I can, however, do some pretty cool stuff with a curling iron. I bought one of those that has a bunch of attachments like crimping, sprirals, and ovals.....<P>

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by LostHusband:<BR><B>As for the hair, to start with you can get the spray detangler. We used to use that a lot. Now I just make sure it's wet and start from the very bottom and work my way up.</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Oh, well. That sounds like a better (cheaper) idea than the chloroform I was going to suggest...<P>

LOL!!! I have thought of the chloroform before, too!!!<P>Thanks for the tips Bill.<P>What is a hair wrap??? I would love to do stuff with my D's hair other than one long plait, but she HATES looking 'pretty'. I suppose you think I'm lucky, hey Bill?<P>I can't French braid either, but then it's because she's never let me try...I think I have given in too easily with her.

Hey Jacky, what do you make of this that happened last night. Lisa, my X, has been in Texas for the past 4 days and called me last night at 10:00. Conversation as follows:<P>Lisa: What are you doing<P>Bill: Getting ready for bed, are you home yet?<P>Lisa: I’m 1.5 hours away<P>Bill: Did you need something?<P>Lisa: I was thinking of just coming to your place to spend the night<P>Bill: Why?<P>Lisa: I wanted to see the girls<P>Bill: Lisa, the girls have been asleep since 9:30, you wouldn’t be here until 11:30, when would you see them?<P>Lisa: Well I just want to be with them<P>Bill: Oh and watch them sleep, I don’t think that’s a good idea<P>Lisa: Well can I come over anyway?<P>Bill: Lisa, I don’t think that it’s a good idea, now I’m going to bed.<P>

sorry double post<p>[This message has been edited by Nina too (edited October 02, 2001).]

Hmmmmmmmm!<P>So, I take it you didn't get that little subliminal message from her, or you did and didn't want to take it up???<P>I think you were incredibly strong, incredibly at peace with your situation or incredibly stupid...what, did I say that??? Not the wise jester, surely!!!<P>Actually, the first thing that entered my head was this "So, you're really not loving this woman any more?" <P>Was there more to this, friend? I mean, did you hang up, did she say oh, okay, and just say goodbye, what?<P>Hey, if it was me right now, I would be SUCH a sucker!!!<BR>I'd say yeah, come around, spend the full hour and a half in the bathroom Plan A'ing myself, etc etc...<P>Did you read something I wrote SOMEWHERE here about my holding off full Plan B, because someone had asked me if I had done EVERYTHING? Also money issues...anyway the thing I hadn't done was send the mushy letter you, me, Mike and EWS were all talking about...so I sent it yesterday. No response. Well, I didn't expect anything. Still, acknowledgement of some sort for your own wife would be polite...he gives more attention to the checkout chicks.<P>Sorry, venting on you!!!<P>Well, I'd say your wife is having some thoughts about all this...I wouldn't yet say regrets, but, well, you never know...<P>Love and light,<P>Jacky<P>PS: any word about Mike?<P>

(((((((JACKY)))))))<P>I got her subliminal message loud and clear. I know exacly what she wanted to do at my house, though I'm unsure of the why. I mean she just got back from spending time at the beach and bars of Texas. I just don't know.<P>Stong or Stupid - Who knows... Lisa is an extremely beautiful woman and with the simple word yes I could of had her again. But the cost I pay emotionally for those encounters far outweight the temporary primal satisfaction. I'm really proud of myself for "Just Saying No", that's something that I haven't been able to do in the past. <P>"""""Actually, the first thing that entered my head was this "So, you're really not loving this woman any more?""""""<P>Oh, but Jacky I do totally love this woman and she knows it but I am able see how bad she is for me. I'm able to see how last night would of been her way of proving that she could have me at any time. You know maybe I screwed up by declining her offer and taking the opportunity to meet one of her needs or could it be that this will allow her to see that I AM GONE and force her to deal with reality. If reconsiliation were my goal then I'd explore this further but since it's not my goal (I'm not saying I wouldn't think about it if the circumstances were right) I'll just leave it at that.<P>Oh and Jacky, if you learn one thing from me today, should the occasion arise don't be a sucker or at least weigh the emotional cost before you do anything...<P>As for your letter, don't plan on hearing anything back at all. Allow it to be enough to simply know that you sent it and he read it. Start preparing for your next move and guard your heart......<P>Hugs, Thoughts, & Prayers <P>------------------<BR>Love, Bill<P>-There are none so blind as those who refuse to see!-<BR>-Stand up and do the right thing, even if your standing alone.-

Thanks for the advice on my letter to H...as I said I didn't expect anything, but it hurts a bit just the same.<P>Yes, I KNOW you still love her, I just said that was the first thing that went through my head, and therefore, probably hers, too. But you sent her a message, and you also protected yourself, and for that you should be so proud.<P>For the record, I have said there will be none of that stuff for me and my H while we are separated, and I still say it, though the opportunity never presented itself...had I done all that tushy stuff (remember my fantastic Plan A day back there???) at night when the kids were in bed, well it may have, BUT I would still have said NO. Would have LOVED to get that reaction, and I probably WOULD have, had the kids not been around...just to boost my ego, y'know!BUT, self respect and all that, just like you.<P>BUT, isn't it interesting though, that she tried that? Wonder what that means, Bill? Is she missing you and your ways? Feeling lonely? Regrets what she has done? Only she knows, and she NOW knows it isn't going to be easy to win you back, if that's what she wants...cos most women have this thing with men and sex...they just think men will ALWAYS say yes. I am proud of you for having enough self respect to say NO. Do what I do, and dream about it instead for a while!!! <P>Love and light,<P>Jacky<P>