so i guess diane did not pay her cell phone bill. it is not in service anymore. and i have no other phone numbers to reach her she is 1200 mile away. not at work or the house she lives in. so i do not even know if i will talk to kelli this weekend. sometime i cannot believe this is happening. so diane is happy now working like a dog sometimes until 10pm at night. kelli fends for herself and hangs out with the wrong crowd at school. this is suppose to be good for the kids as diane told me. is she nuts i have to see randi's teacher today at 8:15am to talk about getting randi some extra help and kelli is also failing in school. so this is what life is all about i want my money back i got sold a lemon.<p>[ October 30, 2001: Message edited by: ronnb ]</p>

Hey Ronnb,<p>I replied on another one of your threads also. Maybe if you kept your postings together on one thread you would get more responce from folks. Just a suggestion.<p>I understand that you son (Randi) is with you. How old is he? How old is your daughter (kelli)?<p>Do you have any court orders on visitation etc? If your W is taking your daughter into a situation where she is out of contact with you, it probably violates your visitation orders if you have any. I don't know much about that stuff.<p>I'm sorry this is happening to you.<p>Keep us posted on what is happening. Try to write more detail. Maybe somebody can give you some advice.<p>-AD

Hang in there Ron, you can make your life better, with or with out W. you are in control of yourself and you can do this. Take care of yourself

Randi is a ten-year-old girl. I am castodial parent for Randi. I wrote the visitation for the children but I can not afford to ship them back and forth now. I check prices $850 round trip for two for thanksgiving. See the divorce and seperation papers are out of colorado I do not trust that if my daughter went back with herself that my wife would not try to keep her one way or the other. $850 Thats out after all of this and truck repair, plates, registration and the bill she left me with also having divorce papers in colorado and me in california. My wife walked out with a cell phone bill and a car payment and master card. I pay her car and health insurance for everyone. <p>My wife had a yahoo account until yesterday see I sent her a few choice thoughts lately but sense her computer access was out because of a hard drive crash 1 1/2 months ago she has not read them. Well I figured out her user name and password and deleted her account and all those unread emails. She will think the account was closed for lack of use. (well I feel better) Having been working throught all of this has been a great thrill let me tell you. She left me 2 1/2 months after I started a new job in a new state with a new house then left when I was at work. Took what she wanted took money out of the bank and went to her girlfriends 1200 miles away. I almost lost my job because of this, I came within inches of living under a bridge with my Grate Dane and Randi. Such a joy life can be sometimes. Kelli want me and Randi to move back but I told her (how) if I move back no job or house or place to live. If I move back randi would live with mom and me in a tent. My wife She tell me she still loves me and always will that she wants to be friends. One thing about being 1200 miles away is that I do not know what she is doing or seeing. If I saw her with OM in the picture I do not know how I would act I know how I would feel inside like ripping his lungs out.<p>[ November 01, 2001: Message edited by: ronnb ]</p>

Ronnb,<p>Sorry I miss-guessed the gender of Randi. I'm sure you are glad to have her with you. I understand your concern about sending her to see you wife. Why must you pay the airfair both ways?<p>Take care of your job man, I lost mine because I was so busy worrying about my marriage I didn't do my work. Also, W was always calling me talking for hours - asked me to come home early, not go to work some mornings. So, I really messed up to let that happen.<p>I understand about the email account. I have messed with my w's (and OM's) email quite a lot over the last couple of years. I don't think it is a good idea to delete her account though. I used to delete messages from OM, but eventually one got through and .... I was sunk. Anyway, I've been there, done that, gave it up. If I hadn't given it up, maybe I could have prevented him from coming here somehow - or kept them apart somehow. I don't know. I don't miss reading her email. It was such a waste of time - especially reading OM's email. Most of it was in Russian, and I had to hit the dictionary quite a lot.<p>Sorry I didn't reply to you yesterday. Keep writing. Maybe some of the other regulars will comment on your situation.<p>Please, tell us more about yourself and your marriage.<p>-AD

AbandonedDad <p>Well I had my daughters ears pierced yesterday she is 10 she is happy. Mom will not be I told her two weeks ago I was going to do it and she said NO not until she is 13 like her sister. Well thought she wanted them she feels good about having them a right of passage for girls. So we had dinner after and I asked did they hurt and she said a little also asked what will mom say I told her we will not tell mom if I did she would yell at me about it remember she said NO. Being 1200 miles away mom will not know for some time and if we do not tell her we are not lying. <p>Well I saw my Dr. yesterday and we went over the blood work I had done 4 weeks earlier. We had a talk about how I was doing I said I feel like I have been run over by a herd of elephants. I am on like 15 vitamins and herbs a day and Wellbutrin. He gave me a Testosterone shot in the rear to get my endurance up it was around 800 before all this and dropped to 442 from stress and depression give a women a shot of pure testosterone like that would kill them, the nurse that gave me the shot said if I took a dose like this I would kill someone I thought that was funny. Also we set up an appointment with a consoler (shrink) next week to help sort out all of this and try a new approach. Well I am feeling better day-by-day but it is a slow process maybe the longer you where married the longer it takes I do not know but we have been together for 20 years. I have never felt like I had in the past couple of months, it was more pain at one moment in time all at once than all the pain I have felt in my whole life added up.<p>[ November 03, 2001: Message edited by: ronnb ]</p>

Hi ronnb,<p>I know for a fact that the pain of infidelity is worse than a death. My brother died last year, and it hurt BAD, but not as bad as this. Goes to show you, huh?<p>I am a little worried about why you got your D's ears pierced after W said no. It sounds a little defiant of you!!!! Not that I blame you in your current situation, but maybe it will be a sore point with the W.<p>And sorry, omission is lying. All the WS's here omit information to us....how did we feel when we found out? Just as betrayed.<p>I don't mean to flame you at all, really I don't. I know the pressure of children when they really want something, and it can be easier to give in. But be aware, your D is probably excited about her ears, and she will probably blab. Sounds like you asked her to lie for you btw. Is that wise, do you think?<p>Anyway, just my 2 cents.<p>Love and light,<p>Jacky

I will tell my wife and take my abuse that will come next. but my daughter has been through alot also and needed something to up lift her spirit. my job is to help her enjoy being a kid.<p>[ November 03, 2001: Message edited by: ronnb ]</p>

You know what the secret is to good red beans and rice is Reese Hickory Liquid Smoke and Budweiser as a thinner agent. Well the Durkee Red Hot Sause and other stuff.

You know my stbx cell phone was shut off 10 days ago for non payment. I have no other means to contact her or my other daughter except pony express. I do not know what is going on in her head she has not called even collect to give me a back up phone number if I have a emergency or Randi gets hurt. She did not even call this weekend I feel that is real strange. Space aliens again. I have a friend I could call to drive over to the house and say wake up. The lights are on but no body is home. How do people change like this she has not even talked to Randi for 2 weeks and only sent her 2 cards.
Space aliens again. Any insight would be welcome I can not figure it out.