Hi All,

See what happens... I get the flu and go down for a week and we end up on page 2.? LOL <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Well guess what? I'm back... I'm not a 100%, but I'm doing a lot better.

It must of been all that snow I shoveled... dropped me like a lead balloon. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Avondale...

I wish I was at a beach house right about now. They say we will be in the 70s here all week long... so we will see.

You tried to keep it from going to page 2... and you almost succeeded. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

EC...

Glad to hear that you have a direct line telephone # that you can talk to your daughters on now. That should make your relationship with them a lot better.

Keep up the good work.

Petvet...

You and I seem to follow right after each other... your down with allergies and I'm down with the flu.

How's everything else going in your life?

relady...

I am signing papers to refinance my house and have my exW's name removed from it... so in that area, everything seems to be moving in the right direction.

WGTT...

Sounds like everything is moving in the right direction for you... hopefully I'll reach that point in time in the not to distant future.

Get this... my G/F didn't want to come over and take care of me because she didn't want to get the flu... can you believe it? LOL <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

We went to Church this weekend so it was all good.

Well I'm all medicated up... so if I have any spelling errors (more than I usually do)... you will know why.

I hope everyone has a great day.

Stay Strong!

Wallace

<small>[ March 31, 2003, 09:41 AM: Message edited by: Wallace ]</small>

Hi Wallace,
It's been almost a week since anyone else has posted here. Do you think it's a case of spring fever or is everyone scared to post for some reason?

I hope you get your warm weather - you deserve it after all that snow!

Hi Avondale,

It kind of looks like everyone has Spring Fever... LOL.

We are getting some nice warm weather here. It was about 71 degrees here yesterday, and it's suppose to get up to about 76 degrees today. It's a welcome relief compared to what we had here a couple weeks ago.

My next mission is to still clean up my yard. I've got broken branches all over. It's going to take about a week to straighten it all out. I would of had it done already, but I had to go out and get the flu bug instead.

My G/F's birthday is this Thursday so I'm trying to get her birthday party taken care of... finish my taxes... (joke of the day), daughter's, brother's and my mother's birthday, and CS issues all coming up this month as well as my 1 year D-day on the 19th. It will be 1 year since any of us has seen or spoken to my exW.

So it's shaping up to be a busy month.

Petvet, relady, EC, WGTT, RMA, Dave, and everyone else...

Come out, Come out, wherever you are.

Hope everyone has a great day.

Stay Strong!

Wallace

Hi All,

I've been at a church retreat since Wednesday. I thought upon returning, it would take me a week to read all the posts. Where is everybody?

The weather here has been beautiful as well, maybe it is spring fever.

Avondale

Thank you for the real estate details on your beach house. You already know me well! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> I would have been wondering how close to the beach and how large. I'm glad you didn't make me angry by giving the price!

Wallace

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Get this... my G/F didn't want to come over and take care of me because she didn't want to get the flu... can you believe it? LOL </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">NOPE

I'll reserve comment. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">My G/F's birthday is this Thursday so I'm trying to get her birthday party taken care of... </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Is it contagious? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

EC

Was that advice harsh? Or was it what you already knew? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

I'm off to see the accountant, hope she puts me in a better mood, HA HA

God Bless,
relady

Hello ALL,

Hey Wallace Mr Joy Boy <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> I see you're back in action! Throwing your G/F a b-day party, sounds like she'll be excited. Did you ever get your house repaired from the fire?

I think some haven't posted due to the war, as you know when major events happen it sometimes disturbs your normal routine.

Me: nothing new, spoke to YD other day, she's ready to move out on her own, the typical young lady thing however she don't have a job nor knows what to expect so I tried to talk some realistic issues with her. YD said exw told her since she will be 18 in 6 months she could move out since she will be considered an adult but is not what she would like to see happen but couldn't stop her.

I told YD I will refuse to let her out on her own and will demand she come live with me, I feel YD is not mature enough yet. YD said her and exw don't get along as time is going by and they see things differently. I told YD living with her mom is diff from if she lived with her dad, told YD it's apparent me and exw have to different ways of living life also, I told YD if she wants things to open up in her life like they should be she needs to come live with me.

In that I think she is heavily thinking about it. I would really push for YD to have some great success in life if she came, I wouldn't know how to act.

Other than that life is moving along. I'm still going to comm college and studying other things.

Take Care

Hi Relady,

Our messages passed in crossing. The advice you gave was not harsh at all, it only reduced me to crumbs <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Just joking <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

It was good, I just don't know if I want to live beside anyone I kinda want a house at this point in my life.

Hi all! I've finally gotten over most of my allergy sickness. I had to finally breakdown and go to the doctor. Those over the counter medications just don't work for me anymore.

EC: I'm happy to hear that your exW is giving you more unrestricted access to your daughters. The question I have is what's up with that? You are correct by not letting your OD move out on her own right now.

Relady: I'm happy to see that you are doing well.

I'll be back later. I have to go to parent-teacher conference this morning.

Later.

I'm back.

Wallace: I hope that you are feeling better. How is the GF?

Avondale: Remember this phrase, "Stay Busy". It really works.

Me: You mean to tell me that there is an Tough Love imitator out there. They have some gall. We'll things are going very well. I am a happy camper. As far as the baptism is concern, I spoke with the RE at the parish and she felt that we probably needed to wait until next year and bring him into the fold. In the meantime, let him get better acquainted with the liturgy. His teacher said that he is doing much better in school and is 25% below his grade level for next school year. Hopefully, he will be able to catch up by the end of the school year. His mom missed her deadline to have her personal affects removed from the house. When I approach her about the situation, she says that she does the have any room in her apartment to put the stuff nor can she afford storage space. Now listen to this, she said that if I was in this situation, she would not put my things out. She says that I am so unfair. Well, I am taking the things to her apartment a giving it to her. I don't know what her problem is but I think I have been quite nice. Most folks would have thrown her things out along time ago.

And I'm gone.

Hi All,

relady...

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">quote: Get this... my G/F didn't want to come over and take care of me because she didn't want to get the flu... can you believe it? LOL

NOPE

I'll reserve comment.

</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Now I really wouldn't want you to hold back here on me. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

I really had to make my own Campbells chicken noodle soup... all by myself. I know that's hard to believe... I'm even having a hard time buying it. LOL <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

How's the real estate market out there? They say that housing prices are beginning to drop out here. Of course the price of life is way out of hand over here.

How was your time at your retreat?

EC...

Mr.Joy Boy... LOL... I wish that was the case. I'm only at about 70%, so not much "Joy" being thrown out there yet... but I'm working on it. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

I'm still dealing with the damage that was done with the fire. The electrical still needs some more work on it to get it back up to snuff. It's taking somewhat longer than everyone anticipated but it's going in the right direction. This snow storm that we had really complicated things.

I'm glad to hear that you have been in touch with your YD. Do you think that she might move in with you, instead of moving out on her own.

Does she have any future plans for school?

If she decides to move in with you, I'm sure you will try to point her in the right direction.

Glad to hear that your doing well in your classes at Community College.

Petvet...

I'm still fighting this flu bug... I'm not over it yet, but I'm doing a lot better than I was last week.

My G/F is doing pretty good for the most part. I really didn't see that much of her this past weekend... but she has settled in for the long haul with me I believe... and she is going to wait things out and let everything happen in it's own time.

I'm glad to hear that you got your son's Baptizing situation somewhat straightened out... that's good to hear. Hope your son gets caught up in school... when you get behind like that... you really have to knuckle down to get caught up.

Have you and your exW straightened out your parenting issues?

As far as your exW's personal possesions... if it was me... I would deliver them over to her and let her deal with it. It's not your responsibility to be her keeper... that includes her personal items. That probably sounds kind of harsh, but she is going to need to take full responsibilty for her actions.

avondale...

How are you making out with the triggers? It sounds like it's been a little rough for you lately... of course I could be seeing shadows in the night. I just get the feeling that all that has happened is starting to really work on you.

Let me know if I'm off base with this one.

I hope everyone has a great day.

Stay Strong!

Wallace

Hi everyone,

Life has been VERY full. The business did not sell <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" /> so it is being liquidated. I doubt that I will see any money from that to help defray all the money still owed. I was served papers today on outstanding debts that I personally guaranteed. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

All in all, I am focusing on where I am going and not where I am. If negative thoughts come into my head, I just say next and watch them roll by like a frieght train.

WH is being surrounded by strong Christians and I am sensing some movement. I have no expectations and am leaving it up to God.

Avondale I will be in Hattaras in Mid June for a family reunion. Personally I have never been there and am looking forward to the trip.

To everyone I am one step away from being overwelmed that I come here and read but don't have the brain power to respond much. All of you are in my thoughts and prayers.

D.

Hi All,

I'm Slowly digging from under paper!

WGTT

You're in my prayers as well. Remember, God saw this day coming and has already made provisions for it. Continue to look to Him and He alone will reveal your next step. Circumstances are never what they seem. Our hope is in the unseen. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Wallace

Ok, you asked for it! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> IMHO, I wouldn't be concerned about catching the flu if I were nursing the man I love back to health. Obviously she never played doctor, nurse as a child, or she would enjoy it as an adult!! LOL <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> What if you were married, would she sleep in another room? Just a question.

After all you're making arrangements for her birthday party on your sick bed! LOL

EC

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> I just don't know if I want to live beside anyone I kinda want a house at this point in my life. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">What difference does it make who lives beside you as long as they're paying the mortgage for you?

You can also choose who lives there!

You won't be there forever, only long enough to build equity and move on, keeping that as a rental.

You've got to put on you investment hat for this strategy and take out the emotion. This will be a business. Hey, I'm being gentle. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Petvet

You can always have the things delivered to her without you getting into a confrontation. Call a delivery service or someone with a truck. You can usually find them in a local paper. Just a thought.

Avondale

Hope all is well.

God Bless,
relady

Hi All,

Well it's my G/F's Birthday and I've beem moving at about a million miles an hour. There is always so much to do with so little time to do it in.

WGTT...

Having owned my own business, and with the financial mess my exW left me with. I can tell you from first hand experience... that you think it will never end.

The good news is, with a lot of prayer and perseverance you will get through all of it. Let it roll by, and then come back to it after you have seen the total damage Then, take one thing... and deal with it one at a time... and you will eventually start seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. It won't be a freight train coming at you, but it will take some time to straighten it all out <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

relady...

You bring up some very valid points, that's why I asked.

Needless to say... I was thinking and feeling the very same way. Can you say, " A few red flags went up"?

It was definitely noted... some things just stay with you and that was one.

I thought maybe I was looking at it from a point of view that maybe I shouldn't have.

So I'm not the only one that is seeing what I'm feeling.

Thanks for the heads-up on that one.

Petvet, avondale, EC and anyone else that I missed...

Hope you are all doing well.

Have a good day today all.

Stay Strong!

Wallace

Hi all,
I'm gonna be brave and post an opinion here. I never thought I'd be siding with Wallace's GF but there may be another side to that nursing the flu thing. To me, it would depend on (1) what type of flu is it? A cold? Or the throw up type? (2) In what manner did she decline to help? Was it "I don't want to come over and open a can of soup" OR "I don't want to come over and touch your germy laundry" type of comment...The former is carrying it too far if you have a cold, but the latter may be understandable if you're puking all over the place. And also, to be honest, I don't think it would be THAT weird to sleep in different beds if one of you had the throw up type of flu and the other had a big presentation the next day at work. Wallace, tell us what the birthday plans and gifts are/were! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

WGTT - You will love Hatteras (simply because you need a break). But you will REALLY love it because it's a wonderful place to vacation. I'm keeping up with your other threads, you seem to be doing well and have lots of support here on D/D.

EC - I think I know what you meant when you said you didn't want to live beside someone - in a duplex you're practically roommates, at least in a lot of the duplexes around here. But Relady was right, you could choose who rents there (be careful of federal laws there though).

Petvet , you doing OK? It's good your son has improved in school. Why don't you get a friend to take your exw's stuff to her? I know you're glad that April 15 is only a couple of weeks away now! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Hello to everyone else!

<small>[ April 03, 2003, 04:17 PM: Message edited by: avondale25 ]</small>

Hi avondale,

I'm still at work and I checked back in and saw your post so I will try to give you the latest on the Birthday party plans and such.

I'm taking her and her children, as well as my kids out to eat dinner tonight. Then we are going back to her house and have Birthday cake and ice cream and then we are going to have her open up her Birthday presents.

Nothing real fancy... but I hope she likes the cake I got her, it doesn't look like it came out very well. I bought her a new CD player for her entertainment center, and I got her a Walkman for her to use while she goes on her walks... which she does all the time.

In regards to this flu thing... I talked with her about it today. I just had to really know why she didn't come over. I wasn't throwing-up or anything like that. It was just one of those drop you to your knees kind of flu.

Well anyway... when I asked her about not coming over... she said if I really wanted her to come over, she would of. But, she felt like I didn't really want any company (which I really didn't, but she didn't know that).

She did in fact say that she really didn't want to come over, because she was afraid to get it. I asked her if we were married what would she have done... and she said she would of taken care of me then.

Seeeee how it is!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

You have to marry them, to get their attention... LOL <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> j/k

So after our little talk, I feel much better about the whole thing.

I can't understand why you can't see yourself siding with my G/F. You never take my side. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />
I'm only kidding... that is suppose to be a joke, and I'm just kidding with you.

I'll fill you in on what happens at her party tomorrow.

Hope your day is going well.

Stay Strong!

Wallace

Hi everyone,

Just a quick note because it's somewhat busy at work today.

Birthday went well, and the cake wasn't as bad as it looked, so all went well.

Hope everyone has a great weekend.

Stay Strong!

Wallace

Hi all,

Wallace, glad the b'day party went well. Thanks for your faithfulness in posting. Your posts always boost my spirits <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

I echo Wallace's wishes for everyone to have a great weekend!

Hi Guys and Gals,

This has been 2 crazy days just unreal!

My YD called me lastnight and asked me to confirm what my brothers number was because she just spoke to my niece at my sisters house, but I wasn't home. Then I find out she's called my brother and 2 of my sisters. I then find out she's blasting exw to them about what she's going through and then I find out YD told family she's probably coming to live with me as soon as schools out in 6-7 weeks, I was shocked! She's calling all the relatives even some she hasn't seen in 10 years.

I talked to YD this morning and things are going downhill fast between her and exw, my head is just spinning, you talk about "Shock and Awe!" <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
What bomb hit that camp! YD was angry about some stuff to the point of wanting to walk out <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" /> My sister said she talked to her about it and they agreed to talk more about it another time.

I was so surprized YD called her aunts and uncle because she hasn't spoken to them in about 3-4 years.

Now this means I get to be the close Dad again and have one of my kids(17yrs old) back in my life, this will feel odd after being apart for 2 1/2 years. When YD comes to live with me exw will have to pay me CS until YD is 21 where I live, won't that be something? ain't it amazing how what goes around comes around? The same law exw used against me unjustly is turning back on her.

I've paid CS for 2 years but she'll have to pay for 3 years and a higher amount than I am per month, but what can I say, it was all her doing not mine, affairs and adultery don't pay.

This has been a wild weekend so far, It's like my single lifestyle is coming to an end rapidly, it's weird to think it will no longer just be me in the house soon.

Who would have known this would be part of the outcome when d-day occured but God, just when I thought I lost everything I get a blessing in return.

Take Care

EC - That is GREAT news, what a blessing! ! ! I know you're on Cloud 9 <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> So where is your OD in all this? Have you heard from her during this time of talking to YD ? Do you think she'll move to you along with her sister? You're right, now you'll have to get used to sharing the house again. Maybe you've forgotten how long it takes teenage girls to get ready for work/school in the mornings <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> ....hope you have two bathrooms, LOL.

[C [*] ODE] [/CODE]

Hi all! Needless to say I've been very busy. I hope to get back to the post on a regular basis soon.

I've been trying to enabled the icons, so if you see some weird things with the icons, please let me know.

Wallace: I'm glad you discussed the flu thing with your GF; at least you got things in the open. It sounds like things are going fairly well between you and your GF.

EC: WONDERFUL news about your YD. Do you know why things have taken a turn for the worst between your YD and her mother?

Relady, Avondale, and WGTT : I hope all is well.

Later.

Hi Petvet, good to hear from you-even if it was in your secret code language!

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> [C [*] ODE] [/CODE]
I've been trying to enabled the icons, so if you see some weird things with the icons, please let me know.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">OK, I see some weird things. Not sure what you were doing with the icons...Do you need another html lesson? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> Maybe we should blame it on a rainy Monday!? Hope the rest of your week goes well.