Thanks guys for this thread. H and I are working towards a D. He's living in the house until we sell it. I have an apartment lined up for me and the kids on Feb. 1. I needed to see all these things as I'm still feeling a bit sad over the end of our marriage. However, I will NOT miss:<p>1. Always feeling like I have to apologize when HE's the one who had the A.
2. Worrying about having extra kids over (I could care less, I'd rather have my teenagers at our house, so I know what they're up to).
3. Worrying about WHAT expensive, NOT NECESSARY, material thing he's going to come home with next (he once went out for lunch with his dad, and came home with a new truck)!
4. Worrying so much about HIS feelings that I've lost my own.
5. Fighting over EVERY STUPID LITTLE THING.
6. Worrying about whether or not he's talking to OW, seeing her, having sex with her, WHATEVER!!!
7. Worrying about whether he's found a replacement for OW or not...
8. Worrying about whether he's telling me the truth or not.
9. Worrying about whether or not HE's going to forgive ME for my part in things, while he's just swept his 8-month affair under the rug.
10. Worrying about whether or not he's going to blow up the house with the number of Christmas lights he puts up!
11. Worrying about whether or not I've pulled the car over in the garage far enough.
12. Worrying about whether one of the kids will catch him in the garage smoking dope.<p>WOW, thanks guys!! I'm more ready than ever to move on with my life!!<p>MOM [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

Not cooking for her all the time, cause she couldnt<p>NO more watching her spend a hour looking at herself in the mirror.<p>No more waiting for hours for her to get ready just to go to walmart.<p>No more having to wait on a friday night to do something cause she is still at the gym.<p>No more witchcraft practicing sister in law.<p>No more having to give money to her family cause her mom will not use the masters in teach degree she has. Cause her mom "doesnt like to teach any more"<p>No more having to baby her everytime she get a hangnail.<p>No more having to explain paperwork to someone.. i.e. taxes, bank statements, ect.<p>No more being with someone that will dress up really sexy, just to go to the store. Yet will not have sex untill she is ready for bed.<p>No more boring sex....YEAH...

Jacky,<p>This really is a great thread.....<p>Last week, I took kids and went to my mom's on Wed night for dinner, Dad's on Thursday for Thanksgiving and stayed there until Sat morning, then left and drove to my Grandparents for the day. Even took the dog (English Springer Spaniel) with us. The kids, me and the dog had a great time. I never once had to worry if my H was bored or uncomfortable. I didn't have to get that "can't we leave now" look. I was totally in control of where I went and when I did it. It was great!!!!!!<p>Most of my real pet peeves have been touched on but my main list is :<p>1.) Don't have to worry about planning something that he doesn't want to do like dinner at mom's, or Sunday school social.<p>2.) Don't have to worry why he is so depressed and try to do things to make him happy. <p>3.) Don't have to hear "nothing's wrong" when asked why he has spoken to me or kids in hours.<p>4.) Don't have to hear comments like "I don't know why we don't have any money, I don't have any bills"<p>5.) Don't have to worry about knocking cup of tobacco spit over in den anymore.<p>6.) Don't have to turn TV to channel 4 before power can be turned off (don't ask.. his hangup)<p>7.) Can wear my flannel PJ's without feeling like a prude.<p>8.) Only have 1 boy to clean up "missed potty incidents" after.<p>9.) Don't have to buy Diet Mountain Dew, cigarettes and Kodiak smokeless tobacco anymore ( saves me a fortune)<p>10.) Don't have to hear him grip about how fast the grass grows. ( I can have it cut in the time he used to whine about having to do it)<p>11.) Don't have to worry if I want to store something in his "precious workshop" It is now my barn and I can leave the door unlocked if I want to.<p>12.) Don't have to hear him grip about not having socks or underwear in the drawer when they are folded in basket right next to dresser. <p>13.) Don't have to listen to radio in the car unless I want to and when baseball season comes around again, I'll really enjoy listening to games on radio without getting that look.<p>Whew, I better stop.. This is getting out of control. Pretty soon I'll have forgotten what was so great about him anyway..... or is that the point of this exercise???? [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>PP

1. I can scratch myself anytime anywhere without having to listen to someone gripe.<p>2. I can finally cook food with spices in it.<p>3. The trash can be taken out tomorrow without causing a world crisis.<p>4. I can break wind in the car without being hit.<p>5. I can break wind in the house without being hit.<p>6. The toilet paper can be put on the roll the RIGHT way.<p>7. I have a whole bed to sleep on rather than my half of half.<p>8. I can sleep because there is no cold butt or freezing feet touching any parts of my body.<p>9. I can drink from the milk carton.<p>10. I can sit down for more than 30 seconds without hearing "Billy you need to _________".<p>11. There is no wrong way to fold my clothes anymore.<p>12. The biggest thing is I CAN FINALLY BE MYSELF.

No! NO! Say it isn't so, Bill!!!!!!<p>You actually do that drink from the milk carton thing??????<p>I guess that you're not my ideal man after all, huh? [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>And BTW, which way IS the right way for the toilet roll, in your opinion?

Gshhhhh I left out a few so I am back to post the rest jackie
11. No more make up on the bath room sink
12. no more hair spray in the air
13 no more perfume that makes me sneeze
14 no more finger nail polish on the kitchen table that won't come off.
15. this is the worst I might add, no more finger nail polish remover to smell, yuck.

So why did any of us get married in the first place?

Because we were trusting souls [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] .<p>But, let's try to keep this light, okay?<p>((((((((VB)))))))))))<p>Hmmmmmmmmm........<p>Okay, well, here's another few:<p>* H used to pick his toenails instead of cutting them, then he would leave a little pile of dead nails wherever he happened to be. Do I miss that??? NOT!!!!<p>* SNORING - No I guess I don't miss that either!!<p>* Any task that he could do just as well as me, but didn't, like change the toilet roll. Now he's not here, it doesn't bother me that it is ALWAYS me!!!!!<p>* Watching sport ALL WEEKEND for fear of the couch floating away if he didn't sit on it! NOPE, I do NOT miss the sport.<p>* Him griping about his weight, body, six pack, hair loss, etc, etc, etc. Nope...he had no problem, so why gripe??????<p>* One thing I just can't possibly share....but it was a disgusting habit, and to this DAY he doesn't know I know he did it!!!!!!!!<p>WWWWWOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!<p>NO, I don't MISS those things AT ALL.

SNORING! Yes! the snoring is gone. Well, at least from him, I still have the 13-year old dog who snored in-sinc with him. I'd have to nudge him, then get up and flip the dog too.<p>* No more disrespect from him cursing me out outside the house in front of the neighbors.<p>* No more demands for sex after having spent the day cursing me out and humiliating me in front of the neighbors. Really puts you in the mood, let me tell ya.<p>* No more cowering little boys behind the couch when he was angry and screaming at them for "being kids".<p>* No more smokes, that is such a big one. My boys' asthma problems have been so few since he left.<p>* No more lies, he made a life out of it and wasted 20 years of my life with it.<p>I know some of y'all want them back, but not me. I'm glad he's gone. I love being single and intend to stay that way until my boys are big, likely even after. I can't wait to move home finally and have my own house in a couple of weeks. My head is swirling with decorating ideas, I just can't wait.<p>Chin up.

I am surprised no-one has mentioned smelly feet!!!!!!! [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img]

DD-4-28-2001
D-pending
M-17yrs.
C-12yrs,28yrs,6yr old GD
OW-M-10yrs
OWD-pending
OWC-3 small boys under 10<p>1.no more wanting sex after working all day in bullet-proof vest in hot AL. heat, smelling like a old mop & not wanting to take a bath.
2.telling me he only takes a bath in mornings before going to work, if not working NO BATH.
3.no brushing teeth only in mornings, no matter what he eats all day.
4.No more sleeping with bedspread between legs, says his legs sweat?
5.no more not putting hand over mouth to cough.
6.no more telling him not to talk with food in his mouth.
7.no more walking around house in underwear even in front of our 12yr old son who tells dad to put clothes on.
8.no more skid marks on underwear
9.no more only using one piece of toilet tissue to clean himself, said he didnt want to waste paper.
10.no more using left over bathroom towel from last person
11.no more leaving clothes all over bedroom chair.
12.no more leaving one ounce of soda in can, putting in frig & then not drinking.
13.no more never getting remote
14.no more channel surfing
15.no more like its my fault for everything that goes wrong or breaks around house.
16.no more its my fault that his friends are talking bad about him & making jokes about OW.
17.no more Im not seeing OW on my job again.
18.no more Im not talking to OW while working.
19.no more lies.
20.no more stress when phones rings & no one is there.
22.no more phone rings & they hang up on you.
23.no more toilet seat up.
24.no more not flushing the toilet because he didnt want to wake me up.
25.no more constant crankiness that he blamed on his work hours.
26.no more trying to talk to him while he had his hand in underwear scratching his butt.
27.no more telling me he doesnt have time to go on Vaction. (only once in 17yrs & his parents went with us).
28.no more cleaning out police car all day & not having time to be with family.
29.no more I don't have time to fix something & will do it later(which means months or never).
30.no more blaming others for his problems.
31.no more gossip about his friends.
32.no more get me something for my jock itch, he has had this since we married.(a bath may help)
33.no more I love Raymond walls at our home it was his college degrees or navy items, they were replaced with family pictures of my children & grandchild.<p>my list could go on forever, writing this list has helped me to see that my marriage wasnt good from the being. I should have done & said things different but didnt want to cause any problems in our marriage. The only good that came out of our marriage was our son. I cant wait for the OW to finially see what she left her husband for.

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by misst:
<strong>DD-4-28-2001
D-pending
M-17yrs.
C-12yrs,28yrs,6yr old GD
OW-M-10yrs
OWD-pending
OWC-3 small boys under 10<p>1.no more wanting sex after working all day in bullet-proof vest in hot AL. heat, smelling like a old mop & not wanting to take a bath.
2.telling me he only takes a bath in mornings before going to work, if not working NO BATH.
3.no brushing teeth only in mornings, no matter what he eats all day.
4.No more sleeping with bedspread between legs, says his legs sweat?
5.no more not putting hand over mouth to cough.
6.no more telling him not to talk with food in his mouth.
7.no more walking around house in underwear even in front of our 12yr old son who tells dad to put clothes on.
8.no more skid marks on underwear
9.no more only using one piece of toilet tissue to clean himself, said he didnt want to waste paper.
10.no more using left over bathroom towel from last person
11.no more leaving clothes all over bedroom chair.
12.no more leaving one ounce of soda in can, putting in frig & then not drinking.
13.no more never getting remote
14.no more channel surfing
15.no more like its my fault for everything that goes wrong or breaks around house.
16.no more its my fault that his friends are talking bad about him & making jokes about OW.
17.no more Im not seeing OW on my job again.
18.no more Im not talking to OW while working.
19.no more lies.
20.no more stress when phones rings & no one is there.
22.no more phone rings & they hang up on you.
23.no more toilet seat up.
24.no more not flushing the toilet because he didnt want to wake me up.
25.no more constant crankiness that he blamed on his work hours.
26.no more trying to talk to him while he had his hand in underwear scratching his butt.
27.no more telling me he doesnt have time to go on Vaction. (only once in 17yrs & his parents went with us).
28.no more cleaning out police car all day & not having time to be with family.
29.no more I don't have time to fix something & will do it later(which means months or never).
30.no more blaming others for his problems.
31.no more gossip about his friends.
32.no more get me something for my jock itch, he has had this since we married.(a bath may help)
33.no more I love Raymond walls at our home it was his college degrees or navy items, they were replaced with family pictures of my children & grandchild.<p>my list could go on forever, writing this list has helped me to see that my marriage wasnt good from the being. I should have done & said things different but didnt want to cause any problems in our marriage. The only good that came out of our marriage was our son. I cant wait for the OW to finially see what she left her husband for.</strong><hr></blockquote><p>HOLY COW!!!!!!!<p>Looking at the smilies and I don't see one smiley that shows what I am feeling right now!!!<p>SOMEONE TELL ME WHY I WANT A MAN IN MY LIFE??????????????????? [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img] <p>ANNA

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Nina too:
<strong>I am surprised no-one has mentioned smelly feet!!!!!!! [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] </strong><hr></blockquote><p>Actually Jacky we weren't going to mention your smelly feet but now that you said it........<p> [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Nina too:
<strong>You actually do that drink from the milk carton thing??????<p>I guess that you're not my ideal man after all, huh? [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>And BTW, which way IS the right way for the toilet roll, in your opinion?</strong><hr></blockquote><p>Don't downgrade me from "ideal" status just yet. Actually I don't drink very much milk at all but I do have my personal water jug in the frig which happens to be an old milk carton. I'm the only person who drinks the water and used to get my butt chewed for drinking it right from the container.<p>And as every normal person knows the right way for the paper to sit on the roll is so that the tissues come from over the top.

There was once a post here on what the good things about living alone were, similar to this.<p>I don't have a "WS" so I'll answer What DON'T I miss about my X?<p>It could best be summed up as: "Why I Don't Like Coffee, TV and Dogs" by Princess Buttercup<p>/// very long list deleted ///<p>Had to edit list to keep this "light", hard to do so I just wiped it out -- thinking of how I used to live brings up memories of things no one should ever have to live with. On a happy note, I have come soooo far in the past year!! (Boy do I enjoy being the only adult in the house!)
[img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

Most important...NO MORE LIVING WITH A CHEATER!!!!

* No more instant excuses for everything, like i forget, and have a terrible memory, and then i get crap if i forget something.
* No more lose-lose situations (lose if i do, lose if i don't)
* No more guessing games (she told me that if she had to tell me anything, i didn't do it for the right reasons)
* No more being at work and at the end of the day with meetings and deadlines, asking what time is dinner, and having to listen for the entire day's events for 5 minutes before getting to the time.
* no more having to sleep with a fan blowing on me on the bed.
* no more guilt for not doing what she is doing at the moment.
* no more being told i am being grumpy for not talking while drinking my first cup of coffee on a saturday morning.
* no more being told why i like/want something is because I am wanting to look like i'm rich.
* no more complaints that the computer just sitting there on the desk is making her nervous.
* no more statements telling me i shouldnt do stuff because. . . . for no reason.
* no more listening to the excuse that every day was a very full, busy day, when all she did was what she does every day, for the last 20 years.
* no more listening to "my schedule comes first because I wrote it on the calendar first."
* no more listening to her saying "don't tell me what to do!" and then her saying "Why don't you just do as i say?"<p>geez, remind me again why i wonder that i might get married again?

Hi Guys...haven't filed yet, but am on the verge.<p>Thinking about all the things I won't miss may just push me harder in that direction....here's my list...<p>1) No more wondering if anything S says is truthful.<p>2) No more unexplained mileage on the car.<p>3) No more "I don't know." "I don't remember." "Just did." etc.,etc., answers.<p>4) No more lies!!!!!!<p>5) No more wondering why tissues are stuffed into S's underwear.<p>6) No more having to hear how S shaved back by self. (Must be a contortionist!)<p>7) No more stinky feet....(interestingly enough, after 12 years, can spray shoes everyday for the past year, OP's opinion must have been more important than anything the S might have said, right?<p>8) No more bad breath.<p>9) No more being poked, prodded, grabbed, and asked "what do you have in there for me?"<p>10) No more unexplained disappearances.<p>11) No more hang up calls.<p>12) No more being woken up very early on a weekend to the scent of bathroom cleaner and scrubbing of walls.<p>13) No more having to smell Herbal Essence shampoo.<p>14) No more cancelled plans at the last minute unless I want to cancel them.<p>15) No more listeningt to how S can't breathe when S refuses to EVER blow nose.<p>16) No more having anything and everything I say twisted around.<p>17) No more circular arguments that never resolve anything.<p>18) No more having to wonder if the coworker S is constantly talking about is more than a coworker.<p>19) No more rewatching 15 times of movie reruns when it's nice outside.<p>20) No more being accused of taking all the covers.<p>Thanks for this thread! Feel better now that I've vented.

BILL,<p>ME? Smelly feet? I pale at the thought!!!<p>And, any sane person, with an eye on the dollars KNOWS that the correct way for the toinet paper to roll is UNDERNEATH......over the top just makes come more off at a time than you need. Sheesh! [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] <p>And the milk carton thing.....why don't you buy a water jug? Just curious!!!!! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Dig, dig, dig...............

Great topic!
I do not miss feeling that whatever I do it was never good enough.<p>I do not miss having to live in a freezing home,both in winter and summer....I can have whatever temperature suits me in winter and no AC in summer.<p>I do not miss having to listen to his racial jokes and judgemental attitude about everyone he knows.<p>
I do not miss having to compromise my values .. to a point of fault.<p>I do not miss not being recognized for anyof my accomplishments.<p>I do not miss him undermining me in front of the children ...constantly.<p>I do not miss his self love and interest<p>I do not miss his cavalier ways of spending....<p>I do not miss any aspect of who he became ....