She called tonight. It was really good to hear from her, and to be able to talk to her.<p>There were two things about the call which bothered me though . . .<p>The first was the fact that I could hear my wife in the background telling her what to say to me.<p>My daughter tried two different times during our conversation to get her mother to talk to me. The second time, I could her my W say "just hang up the phone D"<p>Does that sound like my W is even remotely concerned about trying to lessen the pain being inflicted on our daughter? Does that sound like she is even remotely interested in doing things without it being a major battle? I mean really, your D turns to you and says "mommy do you want to talk to daddy", and you reply by saying "just hang up the phone". . . . .arrgghhh

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Empty Shell:
<strong>She called tonight. It was really good to hear from her, and to be able to talk to her.<p>There were two things about the call which bothered me though . . .<p>The first was the fact that I could hear my wife in the background telling her what to say to me.<p>My daughter tried two different times during our conversation to get her mother to talk to me. The second time, I could her my W say "just hang up the phone D"<p>Does that sound like my W is even remotely concerned about trying to lessen the pain being inflicted on our daughter? Does that sound like she is even remotely interested in doing things without it being a major battle? I mean really, your D turns to you and says "mommy do you want to talk to daddy", and you reply by saying "just hang up the phone". . . . .arrgghhh</strong><hr></blockquote><p>ES,<p>It's sounds like she has you in plan B, without the letter.<p>ANNA<p>[ December 04, 2001: Message edited by: Anna2000 ]</p>

I would recomend not letting your D do that anymore. She may be trying to be the go between and that isn't fair to her.... If her mother wants to talk to you, she will.. <p>Enjoy the talk w/ the D. That's the important thing.<p>My .02$ Just speaking from Exp.. ;-) <p>Tex.

Maybe your w thought you were asking D if you could speak to her........<p>I thought of this cos my son would try the same thing. I thought H was asking to speak with me. Later I would ask if Dad had asked to talk to me.....no.<p>Just a thought.

kids just want the family back together they cant undersatand adult issues <p>ill bet it was all her idea [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>so dont read too much into the asking / denial <p>like it was said W prolly thought you asked [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] <p>mebbe next time you say no honey i just wanna talk to you [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] ?

Anna2000 -- <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>It's sounds like she has you in plan B, without the letter.<hr></blockquote>You know, using either Plan A or Plan B is one thing when a marriage is dying, but we have a child together. . .<p>AgoodManInTexas -- You know, it actually felt kind of good that my daughter wanted my W to talk with me. She knows that if my W refuses to talk to me, then she can not see me, or her cousins, her Aunt, her grandparents . . . She is after all the one is will be scarred by all of this the most.<p>Nina too -- <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Maybe your w thought you were asking D if you could speak to her........<hr></blockquote>You know, I never even thought about asking her to try and get my W on the phone. . . Almost as soon as I answered the phone, my daughter asked me if I wanted to talk with my W. I told her that would be fine, her mom wanted to talk to me. . . Then toward the end of the call, when she asked her mom to talk to me again . . . As I said before, it actually felt kind of good. . . .and NO, I did not ask her to put my W on the phone.<p>soulmate11 -- I think I already covered your comments above. But wanted to thank you for replying, just the same.<p>
For everyone. . . I received an Email from my W at work yesterday telling me that she was planning on letting my daughter come for Christmas. . . I hope and pray that she really doe, and that she doesn't dash the hopes of my daughter and I again. . . .<p>My W also told me that she thought I would try to keep my daughter from her if she "allowed" her to come up. . . . I tried telling my W that our daughter had always been and would contniue to be my number one priority. That she should be both of our priorities. . . I haven't heard a word back from her on the subject since.<p>Today I received another Email from my W with an address where evidently they have moved. . . She claims that she does not have a phone, and also claims that she will go to her mothers house every other day to allow my daughter to check her Email. . . .I wish my W would realize what this is doing to our daughter. . . .

ES,<p>First it's good you have made contact, she has given you the address where they will be moving, it's also good she is saying at Christmas you can see her. I hope she sticks with this. I'll bet it was great to talk to her.<p>Regarding plan A or B, unfortunately most of us have children involved.<p>Let me ask you this. <p>Has your wife made any suggestions regarding what it would take to get her back home, if anything?<p>If she has made suggestions, my next question is, What are you doing to correct this to get her back home?<p>Take care,<p>ANNA

Anna2000 -- <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Has your wife made any suggestions regarding what it would take to get her back home, if anything?<hr></blockquote>No she hasn't. In fact she has stated more than once that the marriage is over.

To give an update. . . . <p>I received an Email today, telling me that I could have my daughter for approximately 24 hours for Christmas.<p>1 day with my daughter in 6 weeks. . . .