Dara,<p>&#8220;&#8221;&#8221;Can you believe its been a year?&#8221;&#8221;&#8221;<p>Actually, no I can&#8217;t. It&#8217;s definitely been one for the books. I&#8217;ve learned and grown so much in the last 12 months that it&#8217;s pretty scary.<p>&#8220;&#8221;&#8221;Sometimes I dont want to let go of the past, afraid that I will let my guard down and get blindsided again. But hell, what kinda life is that?&#8221;&#8221;&#8221;<p>I feel for you there. I&#8217;ve been the same in a way. I&#8217;ve had several offers for dates and I&#8217;m scared of the pain. Finally, I accepted one a couple weeks ago and we had a great time. But for me I&#8217;ve had more fun just having female friends.<p>&#8220;&#8221;&#8221;You never seemed to get depressed after Lisa left in May. How did ya cope? &#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;Ever find out if their was OM?&#8221;&#8221;&#8221;<p>Don&#8217;t be fooled by the mask I wore. I avoided my problems for a long time and then finally faced them at the brink of a depression. The biggest hurdle was &#8220;Acceptance&#8221;. I went through some very dark hours but came through shining pretty good thanks to people such as yourself. <p>I didn&#8217;t investigate any further if that&#8217;s what you mean. I threw away all the phone bills and just payed what was owed. Funny it&#8217;s like I couldn&#8217;t shake it. People kept volunteering information. Well bottom line is she and the man she dated immediately after our divorce broke up last Friday. Honestly, I don&#8217;t care&#8230;<p>&#8220;&#8221;&#8221;Are you still in the same house? 50-50 visitation? How is your middle daughter doing? She was a bit more emotional like her dad if I remember right. &#8220;&#8221;&#8221;<p>In November I finally had to move out of the big house for financial reason. Lisa went back on all the agreements that we had made and we were heading for a huge court battle over custody. We did end up settling out of court on 9-11-01 (I&#8217;ll always remember where I was) for an agreement where I have the girls 3 days a week. <p>Myki (middle) daughter is doing pretty well. As a matter of fact all the girls are doing well outside of some minor problems. I got them into counseling and we are working through some issues. <p>Lisa is working full time, going to college full time, doing EMT on-call two days a week, and taking additional EMT classes one night a week so her relationship with the girls has declined while mine with them has flourished. She stated today she was cutting back at work to spend more time with them which I hope she follows through with.

you sound well Bill. It sounds as if you have dealt with reality pretty darned well considering the circumstances. Who would've thought this 8-9 months ago. I became addicted to this site as it was my only refuge.<p>I am glad for your girls. I honestly couldnt ever see my older two getting through as well. Blinded by my own pain? I dont know. They seemed to take it as hard as I did. Thanksgiving dinner we took turns giving thanks, and oh boy I went on it seemed like half an hour. He is a good dad. <p>Funny...Yesterday I told him his wipers were making this God awful sqeaking noise every time they lowered. Then, I remembered they did that a year ago, and while in the car I commented on it. He said he'd take them 24hours/day for a year straight over one conversation with me.<p>Ya know what? I can laugh about it now. Just as you told me you were rediscovering your sense of humor and self. Glad to hear from ya, I'm sorry I havent kept better in touch.<p>Done any dancing to "I am alive" lately?<p>Hugs,
Dara

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic&f=34&t=005327<p>Dara, I still don't know how to do these shortcut thingies. But the other day OvrCs asked where I found Peace and this was my answer. Please read it and it shows how I made it through....<p>"I am alive" Dancing - NO..... Although my youngest daughter got a Britney Spears CD for X-mas and it had a re-make of "I Love Rock & Roll".. That was pretty kewl and brought back some memories.....<p>L8R<p>Billy

Hey Dara...<p>Where is YOUR update!?! I've been wondering about you and your H... what's happening? Someone point me to the update!<p>Cheers,
Nicole

Hi Nicole!!!<p>Dont even know how to do the update thingy. Lfe is well. I mostly lurk here now. I was asking about you a couple weeks ago on Orchid's thread.