Hi all,
Well, still not done. They managed to drag it out again. I settled, I mean: I settled... paid STBX to get rid of him, and it still didn't work. he's been nickle and diming and trying to get me to have to pay a few hundred more so that even his attorney his getting angry.
We have trial set the middle of this month over the stay away order and attorney's fees. Must say, I am not freaked out about it anymore. I let it go, gave it up to God and am doing OK.
Guess what, God decided it was time for me to have a little help. Don't know how, or why, but an answering machine message was done at a friends house and I got the copy. Someone's cell phone must have hit redial one evening and my stbx and his friend had an entire conversation about CPAs and how stbx bends every financial law as far as he can and then when the IRS looks into it he just has CPA fix it. How this CPA doesn't like me (this CPA had a power of attorney to fix something with my taxes and dropped the ball, I was told to file malpractice on him, haven't done it yet, so he will really not like me <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> and he was also teh one that set up teh business so badly that it cost me a lot of money to fix). It also has stbx talking about his business is covered, and this CPA knows how he runs his businesses (yes plural), so the judge may be very interested in hearing this.
Let's see... as soon as the divorce is final and we are done in civil court, I will be filing criminal child abuse charges against him. Can't do it simultaneously as teh judge is cranky and could look at it in an entirely different light. My D's counselor called, Victim of Crime Compensation sent her a claim form, so there is stuff going on. CPS reopened the files and maybe now STBX will be held accountable for what he did.
He also blew his act of "father of the year" with the younger D's counselor. He got increased visitation with her (4 hours) and yelled at her, threw a cell phone into the dash of his truck, tried to accost me in the parking lot, yelled at her friend, cussed and generally did every thing possible to totally alienate her again. Counselor's reaction was, hmm, give him a little rope and he hung himself. So I think things are looking good there, too.
All in all, now that I quit stressing about all of this, it is falling together and the Big Guy Upstairs has decided to lend a hand.
This is what he is basing attorney fees on: 1)I am the horrible mother who has shortened his visitation time (counselor visit of 1 hour) by having the counselor listen to some tapes of STBX apologizing on answering machine after losing control with D on the phone. If the man can't control himself over the phone, could we expect him to have any when he is with her. 2)I took the kids out of state last summer on a trip they have taken every year for 7 years 3)I involved police when STBX violated the stay away order which his attorney failed to put into written orders.
Now, on to the control issue. STBX told his attorney that he wants to come into the house and take any of the stuff I don't want. Excuse me? He's been gone for 2 years, already took all the furniture, so what kind of assinine statement is that?
Oh, settlement. I got the house (actually sign the papers on it this morning, <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> ), he is signing off of the business, and I think I will still have sole custody of the kids.
Still going to have a lot of debt, but business is growing and we'll be OK.
Lori <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
