I made the decision to give up and move on. WW is unable to make a decision to work on our M. I am going to have a final talk with my W on wednesday.

My goal is to let her know that I tried my best and I believe permanent separation is best for us and that I love you - Im not in-love with you...

I want to do this b.c. I have realized I need to make myself happy and I no longer want to deal with my WW's confused state of mind thats been causing my pain.

I would love to hear anyone with comments on how to let my WW know of this. I want to be gentle and loving. By no means am I trying to manipulate her or to shake her off the fence, I am really ready to move on. I refuse to remain in my M based on fear.

No longer Have to be patient... been patient long enough.

First off, I am sorry to hear that you have to go through this, I know it's not easy, and we have to make decisions. We tend to also second guess decisions from one day to the next, but you sound as if you have carefully thought this out.

In that case, I wanted to let you know I just finished reading the book Love Must Be Tough by Dr. James Dobson. It was very enlightening, and it had a letter from a wife to a husband that in essence, said what you wish to say. Her circumstances were that her husband was having an A, and she was trying to accomodate him, trying to help him make his decision, while he had his cake and ate it too. I'm not sure if that's your situation, but if you would like, I will type out the letter to you either in email or here.

I'm wishing you the best in these awful circumstances...I know they are not easy ones.

Shepette

Thanks for the offer Shepette. I too read Love must be tough, along with a katrillion other books. <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" /> Kinda wish I hadn't even had to read one. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> But I decided how I am going to handle the conversation. No finger pointing. I'll just say how I feel that its best for both of us (really meaning me).

Ya, Im not proud of my decision. I am also not doing back flips. I just want to live again.