When you get married, does that automatically give your spouse the "right" to read your personal mail, whether hand written or e-mail? I have nothing to hide, but my husband never asked me if he could read my mail, my "sent" mail, he just thought it was his "right". He also thinks it's his right to go through my purse and wallet at any time. I feel as if I am losing my "self" here. I am trying to do everything to make him happy, and in the process, I, am fading away, I am becoming nothing more than an extension of "him". Yesterday he asked me why I don't smoke at work! That bothers him. I have no "special" reason, I just don't. But it bothers him. Last week I tried a new lipstick, I said it was in "fashion", that bothered him, his comment days later was "does my wife have to be in "fashion". Is something wrong about that? I'm slowly but surely becoming afraid to say anything anymore, as it will only upset him, then he doesn't talk to me.

This sounds way beyond normal. Sounds like your H has issues with jealousy & control...<P>