OMG everyone......as you have talked to me thru these months you have seen that i (like everyone i am sure) take every little thing hard. last nite was no exception.

my husband served me at home w/divorce papers. they came at 10pm. they knocked on my screen door, did not ring a bell---so they knew i had kids. i said is someone there. it sounded really like wind banging the screen or something. he said i am here to serve "my name" with papers. i waited a few seconds and said she is not home yet. he said ok and i yelled thru the door again, should i tell her who came by? he said, no i can only give them to her. so he walked away and i had time to make a long distance call to my SILs (the one whos husband is cheating w/her friend) find out she is at her friends and call the friend, then have the friends son go look to see if she can talk, then tell the friend why i am hysterical, then have her go get my SIL..at this point my sil gets on the phone , there is a banging again. i go and say hello, they say, i am just going to leave them under the door. they can slide under my rod iron screen door. so i say, well i guess so. so i hear the sliding, and then no noise. by this time i am crying hysterically to my sil (who is obviously going thru some crisis herself.) she says she is having a hard nite and that i need to go stay w/my family.

i knew what these papers were...i had my stepdaughter open the door and quickly retrieve them. i read them and they were as i thought divorce kit type papers serving me w/dissolution of marriage, they were submitted to the court 5-23-03. they are legal. they are stamped by a judge and signed by the clerks.

I AM REALLY LOSING IT!

i have/had already an appt (for 2 wks now) with a lawyer this tuesday coming up. i feel so low already i really really wanted to be the one to serve him.

PS---when i was served and papers were left under my screen door, is that a legal service?

OH GOD I AM LOSING IT.... <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

kuljey,

I'm sorry this is happening to you. I'm kind of numb myself right now. But to answer your question, in my state (Ohio) you have to sign a certified mail receipt or must be served personally. In other words the person serving the documents must actually hand them to you.

Please contact an attorney for advice much better than mine.

Hang in there.

When you are served papers, you have to sign a paper. Check with your state. To have the papers served to you, is hard. I did the serving to my husband, cause I had enough. I was ready and finally willing to go through the process. Not really, but in my heart I knew what I had to do. Cause this man was not the man I married.

If you can, get your family to come and stay with you, or you go to the family. Also, hire an attorney, and get that process going.

There are sites on the computer for legal matters. Also, there are individual help out there for getting the right help and getting questions answered.

This is a step, that is difficult, and hard to comprehend. A step that is changing your life forever. It is not going to be easy, and you will falter many times. I did and still do occassionally. But I have moved on, and leaving my stbxh to do whatever he chooses. It is his life now, and I am no longer in his life. He has told me this many times, and now I am living life the way he has said to me many times.

See if you can get on anti-depressants. They will help to get the edge off. But you need a friend, someone to talk to, someone to help you. I had friends, and some I listened to, and some I let their advice go. It is hard to decide when you are not thinking clearly what step to take.

I will pray for you, and pray for Gods guidance for you. (((Hugs)))

when i was served and papers were left under my screen door, is that a legal service?
He never saw you so it is probably not legal.