I have been getting a lot of criticism from my mom and brother because I am not yet on my feet financially. Here's my situation in a nutshell:

I was married for 12 years, and did not work for the last 10 because my H did not want me to. I was seperated in May 2002. I got a part time job in July 2002. My ex paid child support, so we managed financially. The divorce was final in Dec. 2002, he got the house, truck, harley, pretty much everything; I got sole custody of the kids.

My ex paid child support until March, and then quit working....I assume he is living off of his inheritance. Meanwhile, I am struggling financially. I have been looking for a better job, but I can't find childcare for weekends or evenings, so that limits my options. Also, altho I have restaurant management experience and a BS in nutrition, I haven't worked in my field for 10 years.

To top it all off, my dad died in March, and he was my best friend.....emotionally I am stretched thin, just getting up in the morning is pretty good for me some days.

I really believe things will get better, but I'm struggling with a lot of guilt and anxiety from my family, as they think I should already be making it on my own. Am I really taking to long? What should I be doing differently?

Annavon-

Sounds like your family needs to cut you a break with regards to getting back on your feet. You were only separated a few months when the D became final right? This will definitely take you some time so don't be hard on yourself. I was D'd in Dec/02 as well and have recognized that it's a slow process to feeling whole again.

I'd suggest you figure out a way to use that degree as a decent income will really help out with your overall well being. Set some goals in that area and go for it! Good luck to you and your family...

Families don't always understand.
I know my divorce support group has been a great relief to me in understanding things. They've all been through it, and it takes time to work through the emotions, finances, and with children so many more layers are there.

Understand that your family may not be the support that you want or need, but foryour own sake, you need to find people who can be there for you. In person, not just on the boards.

This is a major life event, it will take time to recover.
Good Luck.

Thanks.....fortunately I do have a great support group in my friends and church. My mom has been putting so much pressure to move back home... it's 4 hours away and I don't know anyone there but her. Here, my kids love their schools, and I'm involved in clubs and church and know nearly everyone in town. I just can't see moving in with mom to save a few hundred dollars rent, but she seems to think it's the only answer. She doesn't even like to watch the kids now, I can't imagine she'd like it better if we lived there. It's just hard to deal with her criticism of me for not finding that good job yet.

Took me a long time. Several years.

You have to do what you have to do. And if you and your children are happier where they are, maybe that's where you need to be.