What are the best books on affairs. I am looking for something that explains the process of affairs. The predictable patterns and such. I have Not Just Friends and His Needs Her Needs. Any other suggestions?

Sad:

Hi, sorry that you are here. I don't normally post in this area, but I was surfing and saw your post.
I did not have an affair, but our counselor said that the behavior that I did exhibit was the same as a cheater, I just didn't involve another person. So, I started to look for books on affairs to see how my behavior damaged my marriage. H is very angry with me and says he doesn't trust me. We have been separated for 7 months and are no closer to reconciling. All I can do is wait.

Here is what I did do:
1. Went into counseling for myself
2. Read everything I could get my greedy little hands on
3. Joined support groups to gain perspective on my life

I went to Barnesandnoble.com and looked up affair recovery and then made a list of all of the books and then went to the library and checked them out a few at a time.

I went to aftertheaffair.net and downloaded a free ebook. This book is designed specifically for the cheater. If you are not the cheater, it can give you some insight, but not much.

I hope that I helped you and I hope that things work out for you.

Dr. Harley has a book "Surviving an Affair".

That may help.

Good luck!

Laura

Private Lives by Dr. Frank Pittman. who is a shrink that specializes in affairs, and discusses all the basic reasons for them. . .

and its a meaningful read about the why's. . .

wiftty

I second that about Private Lies. Its the best I have found. I think I may need to read it again. I also read Sexual Detours, don't recall the author, but I thought it made too many easy excuses for the WSs. I read about half of SAA and it started getting to recovery oriented for me....