My husband and I have been married for 20 years. We have 2 teenage children, who are now living with me. We separated about 6 months ago when I had to move to another city to find a job. He informed me that he was unhappy and that he thought he wanted a divorce. I thought we were working on things, and I allowed myself to slepp with him a couple of times, but come to find out he was having an affair with a woman he meet at his job. I am now in another city, with my kids and he is living with this woman. We talked this weekend and he decided, after blowup with my 17 year old daugther, that he would move to the city where we are, and not bring "the other woman" and we could possibly work on us. Although he keeps saying there are no guarantees. Should I just continue on and file for divorce, or should I try. I still love this man (or am I just self-abusive)??? vrylander48@yahoo.com

Welcome to marriagebuilders. First, please post under general questions. You are a long way from the divorce forum.

Start in Plan A. You can read all about it on the link in my sig line. We at marriagebuilders believe in marriages. There are a lot of us who have gone through the same thing. Many have restored their marriage.

Stick with us and we will help you through this.

On the first thread shown on the Emotional Needs board, there are links to many things here on Marriage Builders - things that will help you, such as list of abbreviations, information about the MB principles, possibly links to other sites. This material was put together by a number of excellent MB participants and not by the Harleys or their staff.

It well might be that EN and Just Found Out might be better pages for you than this one. Check it out and see. There is a lot here and it can help you in lots of different ways.