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Joined: Sep 2000
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Just saw this, and I'm glad to see that things are looking up.

If he actually followed and agreed with all 7 "we decided a few things" points it sounds like a lot of good communication took place. Unless of course CJ's other name is "we". <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">4)he may be bipolar, but with cycles that are MONTHS long rather than hours or days long like his dad;</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">You do know that months long or even longer cycles for bipolar people is the norm and rapid cycling is very rare? Of course bipolar has a strong hereditary component and I have no clue as to whether a rapid cycling bipolar parent would be likely to pass that trait on as well.

However, IIRC, the rapid cycling stuff is very rare. I don't even recall if the cases of rapid cycling are known to continue for long periods of time. Without any expertise at all I'm thinking that a lot of your ex's behavior is more attributable to rageaholism and other problems.

However, I don't even play a psychologist on TV, so I'm probably all wet. I'd just suggest that while worth considering I'd be hesitant to put much weight on this without professional input.

Anyway, great job!

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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by StillHers:
<strong> If he actually followed and agreed with all 7 "we decided a few things" points it sounds like a lot of good communication took place. Unless of course CJ's other name is "we". <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Heehee! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> You're funny. Actually, there was a lot of good communication going on...and most of it was done slowly over the course of the night, and a few were completely put into place and settled this morning. One thing I really admire about my son is that he and I really can communicate...seriously. He's articulate.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"><strong>You do know that months long or even longer cycles for bipolar people is the norm and rapid cycling is very rare? Of course bipolar has a strong hereditary component and I have no clue as to whether a rapid cycling bipolar parent would be likely to pass that trait on as well.

However, IIRC, the rapid cycling stuff is very rare. I don't even recall if the cases of rapid cycling are known to continue for long periods of time. Without any expertise at all I'm thinking that a lot of your ex's behavior is more attributable to rageaholism and other problems.
</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Okay...originally I had no idea what "bipolar" even was!! My mom was/is bipolar, but as a kid I did not know what that was, so I called it "phases of the moon" (because even as a child I could see that there were cycles to it).

When exH was diagnosed, I read everything I could about bipolar on the internet and in books. My head understands some of the theory of bipolar, and I can identify that the disorder my mom and my exH have is bipolar, but in real life, I do not "understand." I am not bipolar myself so I have no frame of reference. And while I have learned a lot about some of the different bipolars, I have not studied which ones are rare or not. I know that "mixed states" is very, very rare!!

Anyway, for a long time I did not recognize my son's long cycles because it was not anything that I had ever experienced before. In fact, it was just recently that I began to even recognize that there was a repeated cycle to it! He goes for about 6 months ...and I didn't see it as a repeating cycle until he had gone through it for a little more than a year! After about a year, I began to wonder, "Hmmm...is there a pattern to this?" Apparently, my son had noticed it too, and wondered if he was just a slower cycler than his dad.

(Oh, and BTW, I have no idea if IIRC continues for a long-time/lifetime, but my suspicion is that as long as exH does nothing to deal with it or treat it or medicate...it will probably continue! I think the bipolar manic/raging goes hand-in-hand with learned ragaholic behavior and patterns. In layman's terms, I think that bipolar magnifies a rage addiction that is already there and learned.)


CJ

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has he been tested for genetic residuals, like Bipolar also? sounds to me like ADHD may not be the only underlying condition. . .

and that just like the X, loving him is good, but may not solve the problems. . .

wiftty

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