Hi,<P>We were gone for 4 days visiting OC. exOW was out of town on business and we dropped OC off and picked her up at her grandmother's house. I have met grandmother before (she is only about 10 years older than I) and she is a very kind woman. I also met her husband this time--that would be OC's step-grandfather. He was the model of kindness and graciousness. He showed us all his favorite tricks to cajole OC out of a fussy mood.<P>We had OC out in public and she drew lots of attention. She is a gorgeous toddler with a personality to match.<P>Someone asked if she were our daughter. I just said "yes." Too difficult to explain that Mr. Job is her father and I am her step-mother. When she is old enough to understand what strangers are asking, I will correct them and say "NO, I am her step-mother." By then it won't look so weird. Lots of women have step-children who are 3 or 4 years old, but not many have step-children that are only 16 months old!<P>Mrs. Job

I hear ya! I am doing the same thing. Our OC is only 7 months old. I dont explain or argue, yes, is all I say. I also will say stepson when the time comes. Maybe at three or four. I once got asked if I was the aunt because " you look like his mother..." AAAAUUUUUGGGGGHHHH!!!!! No way! Trust me, with the exception that we are both larger women, I do not look like her. As if....

Mrs. J. I am glad your visit went well, and the grandparents made the visit go smoothly.<P>I can't imagine ever being asked if I am Oc mother, grandmother maybe, which is what really bothers me. I think how old I feel now moving son into dorm room on second floor, I can't imagine what H will feel like in 18 years hauling up refridgerators and microwaves up two flights, the thought is actually kinda funny if you think about it. <BR> Besides both Oc have dark brown hair and dark brown eyes,like their mother, and both H and I have dark blonde hair and blue eyes. <BR>Tina

I often wondered how I would feel if asked that. Before seeing OC I thought she would be really light and not look like my children. exOW is columbian my H and I are African American. OC ended up darker then me and my children so she would fit right in. ( H mother is bi-racial too black and white so he ended up being very light) She has my D forehead , eyes, and cheeks. The rest is her mother. Right now we have no contact but I know eventually she will be a part of our lives.<P>Unsure

Hi Mrs Job,<P>Just wanted to say Glad your visit went well.<BR>I know what you mean about explaining...<P>It is fortuante oc's grandparents are good people.<BR>There is always room for more good people!<P>Best of luck...fluke

i just want to say i admire all the BW who have accepted OWC although i haven't--i think if it works for you--go for it.