<BR>Does anyone know what 'emotional infidelity' means? Where does one draw the line between a partners other relationships w/ friends in reference to the quality of one's own relationship? <P>Sincerely,<BR>emotional hog that loves a lot

What do you mean by emotional infidelity? Are you speaking of when a person draws the line between a sexual affair and an affair of the heart? If so I may understand what you are talking about.

To me emotional infidelity is sharing every and all things with another person instead of your spouse. While its alright to share somethings with friends it is wrong to include them in everything and exclude the spouse.<BR>From my experience you should not be sharing with members of the oppposite sex, that is a ticking time bomb. <BR>I believe that is what happened with my wife.

I think emotional infidelity means giving a part, and sharing a part of you to another member of the same sex, sharing things with them that you would normally only share with your husband/wife. It is a dangerous thing.

I think of emotional infidelity is the fact that I would rather stay at work talking to<BR>a male co-worker than go home to my husband.<P>I enjoy going to work to be around him.<P>It emontional because I know I love this guy<BR>more than I ever loved my husband but it is<BR>not a physical relationship. <P>We are both married and do not want to <BR>cheat on our spouses.

<BR>Is an affair of the heart not an 'affair'?<BR>I think the needs of both partners are equally important. Without compromise what one considers an affair of the heart could be <BR>disrespecting the sacred marital bond to another. It is important that two partners know each other very well before getting married. <P><BR>

Inexperienced, <P>I agree it's important to know each other before getting married. My ex had a very unique way of excusing his sexual infidelities by saying it's only a sexual affair not an emotional one. "I love you I only #%^& them!" What woman in her right mind (excluding those who get paid for it) would have sex with a man consistently without being emotionally involved? Anyway, why are you asking?

Being emotionally involved can mean just about anything. It can mean anything from a mild concern for the person you're sleeping with to an intense passion. If it is a mild concern only, then one is probably having too much sex and not enough heart. <P>ps-I'm here for the same reason everyone else is; to learn how to build a relationship without messing it up if that is even possible.

My take on this: It can be quite painful when one partner takes the issues in their relationship away from the other, to someone else for comfort and reassurance. <P>I think this happens because we can sometimes be very critical of problems in our relationship, or uninterested, or too angry to tackle them, and drive the partner to find someone else. This also happens because the 'straying' partner is too afraid or unable to emotionally face the problems in a relationship. So they take them to someone else who, being their 'friend,' will be more sympathetic.<P>The 'friend' could be male or female as far as I am concerned, but I can see the problem getting really dangerous if it is a single or available member of the opposite sex involved.<P>When most or all the confiding and relationship problem solving is directed out of the relationship to the other person, I would say sound the alarm. That to me would be emotional infidelity. A kind of running away to get needs met, because the person isn't getting their needs met with the partner and not asking that partner to help them. I guess one solution would be to express feelings and needs calmly and non-abusively towards the other, and to show a desire to listen to what the 'straying' partner's needs might be that are not getting met, then to come up with solutions. My boyfriend and I sure as hell don't have this down right, but we are trying, quite aware that emotional infidelity could lead to events we'd rather not see for each other.<P>Good luck to all of you.