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my WS is struggling....
#841333 02/23/05 03:16 PM
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 164
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Michele Hall
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Michele Hall
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Posts: 164
H text messaged this to me today...

"i am suffering self esteem issues. i'm questioning worthiness. dont deserve u. afraid i cant be what i want 2
be (what u need and deserve). im a wreck"

What do I say? What do I do? Any advice?
Re: my WS is struggling....
#841334 02/23/05 03:37 PM
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 778
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LynnG Offline
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LynnG
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Your husband may now be reflecting on all the hurt and pain he has caused you and really and truly feels awfull. Imagine how you would feel had you done something so awful.

Talk to him about it. Let him get this off his chest. This is a good time to really discuss issues (NOT FIGHT) but really get to the core of things.
Re: my WS is struggling....
#841335 02/23/05 03:38 PM
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 164
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Michele Hall
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Michele Hall
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More...H is telling me he struggles w/temptations on a daily basis and doesn't know how he can fight it.

Anybody been through THIS aspect and how did you survive, or do you ever?
Re: my WS is struggling....
#841336 02/24/05 11:21 AM
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 156
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Mr_NTL Offline
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Mr_NTL
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Depending on the circumstances of the temptations, he should actively avoid the situations where they arise. Even if it's just to get up and walk outside for ten minutes to clear his head. The thoughts can't be allowed to fester -- he needs to find some method of shaking himself out of it and thinking about something else right then. And that doesn't mean thinking "I have to stop thinking about this," because that's thinking about it.

... said the guy who is yet to get through two days of NC. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />
Re: my WS is struggling....
#841337 02/24/05 11:26 AM
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 164
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Michele Hall
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Michele Hall
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Wow, Lost, now I get to thank you for some words of wisdom! As you can see, your road ahead is a long and painful one but I truly believe we can all make it to our beautiful destination one day. We all battle with these issues and obviously even the very knowledgable BS's don't have all the answers and need some pick-me-ups in time of need.
Re: my WS is struggling....
#841338 02/25/05 12:29 PM
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 156
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Mr_NTL Offline
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Mr_NTL
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Any updates Michele? Was it just a bad day (those do happen)? Were you guys able to talk through any of it later?

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