You all know the effects of infedility and how it impacts our emotions and our mental stability. I'm still searching why this has such a emotional effect on people. What are the dynamics of the emotional aspect of violating loyality in a marriage?<P>Human nature is no answer...<BR>

you can read my reply to cjack.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by SteveO:<BR><B>I'm still searching why this has such a emotional effect on people. </B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>I believe the reason it has such an effect on us is that we elevate people that we love to standards higher than our own...We really believe that this person we are with is that one person who would not hurt us, not betray us and when it happens we are devestated.<P>I have come to understand that no person on this earth is any different than I am - we are all HUMAN and are susceptible to the weaknesses of the flesh...if we really understood that, we may make life a little easier on ourselves...<BR>

I think the answers lies (like everything else) within ourselves and what we value in people.<P>I took pride in my loyality and truthfullness. I expected the same in return. When you give yourself to your partner you do it removing all barriors around embarassment, modesty, etc. I shared myself with my H in ways I never could have imagined before I met him. I did so because I felt we were connected and would share the rest of our lives together. I shared my exposed body/self with him during the birth of our D. I share my morning self with him. My hurt self. My angry self. My stubborn self. He knows every aspect of me and my life. I don't show that to many people at all. A handful and that's it. Otherwise those sides of me are protected from the people I don't trust. When you feel so open you are vulnerable. When you get shot you are devestated beyond belief because it wasn't something you'd ever expect. Trust and loyaltiy are remarkable characteristics.<P>When you have it, it's the most wonderful feeling. When you lose it, it's more devestating than anyone can imagine. Cherish these forever. They could carry you a long way. <P>------------------<BR>Lost Soulmate<P>"Character is doing what's right, when no one is looking"