I would just like to know, in feeling all the negative feelings I have right now, how do I be happy for our 7th anniversary?<BR>I really handled his bithday in August badly(I was only 3 weeks post discovery!)I basically just said to him in the afternoon that "I realize its your birthday, but I am just not in the mood to celebrate...By the way, Happy birthday. Sorry, I didn't even get a card."<BR>We are far from being intimate, and the bitterness and anger are still very raw for me. I do however at least want to acknowledge the day in a positive way, and want to let him know that I am not giving up on us yet, even though he knows I had such a rotten week. Any suggestions?<BR>

Hi,<P>Last anniversary, I actually found a card that was especially for sending to your spouse for your anniversary when you were separated. We weren't so it wasn't appropriate, but the point is that if you look you will be surprised at what choices there are.<P>I bought one that basically said that we were in a rough part of our marriage and had an uncertain future, but acknowledged our happiness in the past, love for each other, and hope for the future. I also bought him a small gift, a religious medallion that he wears every day.<P>Of course, the medallion WAS to replace one I threw away when I got rid of everything I had ever given him in the past. But it was still just a little something that I didn't have to do and really didn't want to do.<P>So, my advice would be at least a heartfelt card. Don't do any more if you don't want to, don't feel guilty if he buys you something bigger than that (I hope he does), and be prepared for the possibility that he might not give you anything.<P>Good luck,<P>Peppermint