Hi Everyone!<BR>In an attempt to view the glass as half-full once in a while as I ride this emotional roller coaster, I often think about how the priorities in life become altered when going through this painful period. Have you others out there noticed that things that were once stressful, or very important to you (work, holding speeches, etc.) are no longer a difficulty? These things almost become second nature... <BR>I defend my graduate thesis that I have been working on for the last 6-7 months on, in a hour, I find myself not worried and seem I don't really even care. (Instead, I'm sitting here reading and writing on this site.) Additionally, I presented my work to 50 pwople last week and hardly even prepared for it... If this was me a few months ago before D-Day struck, I would have been climbing the walls right now. <BR>It's a rather strange sensation, and in certain ways wonderful, because I'm not sure I'd be able to handle the stress of it all other wise... Is anyone else out there experiencing the same thing?<P>Sweden

Sweden, <P>yes, you noticed correctly, seems like you don't care for what will happen. I don't know whay is it so, but wanted to let you know I experienced the same during this past few months since all this mess in my life occured. <P>I was at the turning point in my career, about to finish the biggest project I ever had, the one I put almost 3 years of my work and all my reputation. It was in finalising stage - if success, I fly sky high, all doors are open to me; if failure - forget about me! I had trust of my superiors, was responsible directly to general manager of the company, and well aware that leading position in that project was objectively above my rank in the company, and certainly a big byte for me, maybe even beyond my capacity. <P>But, I did all well, and when the moment came to finalize 3yrs effort, my life was in mess. I improvised like I never did before, I was coming on meetings completely deconcentrated and unprepared, I was making slides for presentations during coffee-brakes just before meetings ... whatever happened - I just didn't care. I still don't. Maybe, it's a kind of self-defence system our organism (brain?) create to help us cope with all the stress we have to take. <P>Thanks God, it all passed well, but now I have all doors open, and just have to grab my chances, but - I don't care. I do nothing to strenghten my position, and now is the right time. Very soon it will be late. I'm aware of that, but, I just don't care. Gosh, this is scarry! <P>Take care, <P>Adrian

Sweden - I've experienced this twice now - the first time when my son was diagnosed with a childhood cancer. I think it's a matter of shifting priorities. Things that were vitally important the day before suddenly become miniscule in comparison.<P>WAT

So how did your graduate thesis orals go, Sweden?<P>Thinking of you. --HBC

HBC,<BR>The defense actually went quite well, thanks! I had a large turnout, and I was able to handle all the questions on the subject with relative ease. Now I can start the process of searching for PhD funding and more-effectively working on my Plan A.<P>Sweden <BR>

Yes It seems to be quite a normal reaction. It has happend to me twice now. the first time when my first spouse died, and now when my H of 19 years had an A. Thank GOD it never goes away. People are more important than any material thing, jobs, etc. I could never get that through my H head. I think he needs to be devestated to find that out. He needs to lose the most cherished to him to really know.<P>------------------<BR>Deb

flymsyex<P>He needs to lose the most cherished to him to really know.<P>So true, so very true, people who lose something realize that other possesions are just that possesions. When you start to see what is really important in life you take off the rose colored glasses and the little things just don't seem to matter anymore. I always looked at what I had instead of what I was lacking until I lost what I had, then I looked at what I was lacking, I lost more because I didn't appreciate the things that I had left. Now I am looking once again at all of the things I do have. My children, my health, my sanity(well at times). I don't know if I said it right or not. But hope some know what I am talking about. Jenni

Congrats on the defense, Sweden! I'm glad it went well for you.<P>All the best! --HBC