Just wanted to share this with you...<P><BR>Mistakes...<BR>sudden concessions, sudden attentiveness, competing with the competition, jealousy, negative visualization, making demands and ultimatums, insisting on sex, evoking pity and guilt, and threatening- have in common a profound lack of Love. When a rejected lover engages in them, he/she is contradicting what he/she says he wants to do most- to Love.<P>To love is to pay heed to the needs of the one you Love. When you resort to the above tactics you are focusing only on yourself. The object of that kind of love-wether or not there is any consious thinking about it is not going to experience being loved.<BR>Many of these rejected lovers engage in this and that is why they never get their lovers back..<P><BR>I can attest to doing all of these things early on and all the way up to the day I found this board... Even the day he said he was moving out. I now know that I probably pushed him further away..<P>Isn't it ironic how the mind and heart tells us to act this way and it is the wrong way? Not fair I say..<P>Diana

Thanks for the insight. Can you share your thoughts on the book as you near the end, because I say it recommended yesterday (Lor I think) and I might buy it. Thanks and happy reading.

AH!!! One of my favorites - and not at all out of line, I don't think, with the MB principles.<P>I have to say that it is one of the books I have read the most over and over of all of them (except for <I>Divorce Busting</I> by Michele Weiner Davis). When I got it, my husband was still living at home, so I wrapped it up in a brown paper bag cover - like we used to do with our school books YEARS ago! I haven't read much of anything for the last 6 months or so, and seeing that one mentioned has given me the itch to read it again.<P>Could be a good thing, given that I have been getting some mixed signals from my husband since I began limiting contact in September.<P>GREAT book, Rick - I heartily recommend it!<P>------------------<BR>terri<BR><B>Courage</B><P>Whatever course you decide upon,<BR>there is always someone to tell you<BR>that you are wrong.<P>There are always difficulties arising<BR>which tempt you to believe that your <BR>critics are right.<P>To map out a course of action <BR>and follow it to an end <BR>requires courage.<P><I>Ralph Waldo Emerson</I>