I took the kids up to see my W's dad yesterday. He asked what the latest was and I told him about the 100+ outgoing calls on her cell phone and the hotel phone number. He said if it were him he would call the hotel and then confront her with it. I told him that my new approach was to just be the nice guy she used to know (not a push over) just a nice guy. That I was going to just be her friend, and if she divorces me, then at least she'll do it remembering what a nice guy I was. <P>I may be wrong, but I don't think her family is going to accept OM. She is VERY close to her family and perhaps losing them will be the eye opener she needs - I don't know. Her dad is going out to visit her sister today, which is where my W is. I wonder what he will do or say? He doesn't tend to hold any punches. But he may refrain because of the situation there. <P>BTW, I'm finding myself posting again. Monday I didn't think I would be doing it anymore. Thanks to all of you that helped out on Monday.<P>s&C

Some here may argue that you shouldn't have discussed it with her Dad, but I think it's appropriate if not absolutely necessary. Let her Dad be her Dad - of course you have no choice. Sit back and let her family thing play out. Keep up the good work.<P>WAT

<B>SAC -</B> WAT is right, some here might feel you did the wrong thing in talking to her Dad, but I think you were right. After all, he did ask pretty specifically. <P>Sometimes people respond to someone who doesn't pull punches. That is why Dr. Phil is so popular. Maybe a frank talk with her Dad will have some kind of positive impact.<P>Excellent work to be the "nice guy", but not a "push-over".<P>--DeWayne--

You know...........I told myself from D-Day on-If someone asks me a question the last thing I am going to do is start lying. I refuse to tell partial truths to protect the guilty parties. And I still loved my H very much-but I wasn't going to cover for him. These are things he and the PT ought to have thought about long before beginning their journey.<P>Maybe you didn't have to say anything but we all know how it hurts to try to hold it all in. The hurt we feel as the results of an A are devastating. I think it helps to have a listening ear-that is one reason there are so many here <P>Hang in there sadandconfused-it sounds like you are doing much better.<P>And you know what..........if her dad does say soemthing to her she is going to be wild with wondering why you-the bad guy (not really)-did confront here with the information.<P>You did good! Real good. Keep it up.<P>------------------<BR>*heartache*<P>"Life's A Dance<BR>You Learn As You Go.<BR>Sometimes You Lead<BR>Sometimes You Follow!<BR>Don't worry 'Bout What You Don't Know<BR>LIfe's A Dance <BR>You Learn As You Go."<p>[This message has been edited by heartache (edited April 26, 2001).]