We have had an incredible couple of days (and nights) together. I have gotten my test results back, and all is well (WHEW!!).<P>I must be one of the extremely lucky ones right now. H is jumping in full swing. The affection, SF, and domestic support are happening bigtime. I am in 7th heaven... and it appears that H is feeling the same way. However, I am still cautiously awaiting some withdrawal on his part. But thanks to MB, I'll know how to deal with it, should/when it happen(s).<P>H is very willing to do the things I've asked of him, and has already started on them. He has deleted his personals account on the site where he keeps in touch with his new 'friends'. That's a HUGE start. I even wrote him a thank you email when I saw that he had done it. He deleted it on his own, not with me hanging over his shoulder. That's got to say something great!<P>I talked to him about the 'no contact letters', and he's a little bit of a waffler on that one. He feels that he can just ignore them should they try to get in touch with him via email. I'll work with him on that one some more (grin). Changing the email account that his friends know of, will not be happening (for now?). I can live with that. It's because of other emails he receives there (won subscriptions to electronic sites). However, I will ask if he can change them over. I have not asked if I can have the password to it yet, but I will. I don't want to enforce my list of 'requirements' all at once. <P>He will be changing his icq#, and I have agreed to do the same. There are a few people on my list (one in particular)who make him feel uncomfortable, and he would like it if I stopped contact there. I have no problem with doing that. Even though, one of the people is an online friend of mine for over 2 1/2 yrs... my marriage is far more important, and I cannot expect H to do it all, I have to be willing to meet his requirements as well. Tit for tat? Yup. But that's okay.. isn't that what marriage is all about?<P>H has never been one for counselling. He thinks it's a waste of time. But then again, his one and only experience with one as a teen in high school was a very BAD one. So I cannot blame him for feeling that way. HOWEVER.. as he told me last night, "Because it is important to you, I will go". I won't rush him into it. I'll start by having him meet my counsellor by getting him to drive me there one day. Although I really like her, I will find another one if he doesn't feel like she's someone he could open up to.<P>H admitted to me 2 nights ago that he is still having some doubts. He is worried that there are more 'surprizes' coming (my MAJOR LB's). I have assured him that I have no intentions of that. And he understands that although my actions were awful, they were really REactions to some of the things he's been doing. <P>I have done very very well in explaining to him that I know that he wants to come home only if he's fully sure. And I am working on creating that 'safe' environment for him. Suggestions such as signing a contract covering certain issues, and keeping most of his things in storage for the time being have come up from me. He just doesn't want to feel coerced into being here. He wants to know that he's doing what he wants to do, on his own. And with his input, we are doing a great job at reaching a great comfort level.<P>The last thing we are going to do is rush right into him being here fulltime. Together, we are working on squelching out (his words, grin) any doubts he may have lingering. My personal guess, is that he will be living here full time, with all of his 'stuff' by the end of the summer, at the very soonest, early July.<P>That's it for now. Thank you to all who sent me suggestions, I'm sure I'll be requesting more soon enough (grin).<P>Karen<BR>

<P>Dave

Be prepared for setbacks...<BR>... but enjoy the great progress so far!<P>Two steps forward...<BR>...is always better than any step back!<P> <P>Jim

Smiling over here.... ;-)<P>You go girl!!!!!<P>Will be praying for you and your husband.<P>Z

And how could I have forgotten this???<P>H has agreed to do the MB questionnaires with me! We probably won't get to starting on those until mid June, but it WILL happen. (there are a lot of family things going on up until then).<P>note to self: I can't believe I forgot to mention that! <P>Karen<BR>

Great news Karen!<P>Though the part about "waffling" on the no contact letters. I had that thought initially, as zorweb had done a good job of initiating that online ... however, after much discussion and soul-searching, it is apparent that it fulfills her EN for honesty, etc. I rethought the issue: if it is of such high importance, then it must be done. So I have, and gave her the letter to post (via an email account she created).<P>Again, congratulations: stay the course, the road gets bumpy once in awhile.<P>Godspeed and good luck,<BR>STL