Do people know what husbands do in Asia - well believe me it's not pretty. Now I have been exposed too. Too many American and Europeans come to my city and do anything to chat up the local girls - do you think they would do it at home. You watch them it is like a hunt - find the one that can be sweet-talked, the lonely one, you hear them all talk about the different characteristics to look for. I was away from home because of work for 8 weeks and wife was very lonely and fell in a time of weakness. (By the way the country I live in is highly educated and affluential). I can go into a quality bar/night club any night of the week and find dozens of these married men. Well I have had enough I am going to tell the women of the world to watch out and if anyone wants to know the reality behind some credit card names they get to see post them and will try to help. I am a westerner myself but have been living here since childhood so consider myself a minority here and am ashamed by the behaviour I see all too often.<P>I hope there are other men that feel equally about this issue

I must have missed whatever point it was you were trying to make!<P>If I had to try and figure out what it is you are trying to say this is my geuss,<BR>You went out of town, your wife cheated, the man was asian, now you think all asian men are slime, you blame them and not her?<BR>How's that, close?<BR>My H has been out of town now for 4 months, he's military, I don't cheat because my marriage is good and important and I love my H. When I"m feeling weak I find comfort in a good cry not the arms of another man!

shedawg - I don't think that was his point.<P>Quite the contrary.<P>I think he's justifiably disgusted with the behavior of Western men IN Asia, not Asian men in the West. <P>Agreeing with you, of course the nationalities shouldn't matter. I'll bet it's the same everywhere - and not limited to the men!<P>WAT

Hey, European men do this with traveling American women. They think that American women are loose so they try hitting on them. It' a sport in the resort and turisty areas.<P>Z<P>------------------<BR>He loves not who does not show love.<BR>----William Shakespeare<p>[This message has been edited by zorweb (edited July 15, 2001).]

Hi,<P>Let's not underplay this post. This manipulating stuff goes on all over but HIP does have a point. Asian women tend to think (sometime due to their upbringing and then stupidity taken to an excess) that their primary way of getting ahead is to please a man. Since most men's needs are SF, BINGO. Can't speak to them real well in the men's native tongue but body language is universal. <P>So men put themselves in locations and situations where they will be hit on. Women are out there hitting on men in bars, clubs, etc. 2 kinds of people asking for trouble and finding it. There are other ways to do this, other tools to meet people, even at work, at home, anywhere. <P>The point is that the more one associates with those with this type of mentality the more likely they are to sucumb to it. "Bad association spoils useful habits." (direct quote from a good book).<P>So you want validation? Yep it is out there, HIP sounds like he is trying to uncover some of the tricks used to hid these indecent encounters and maybe give us another tool to uncover them with. Cell phone records, devices to check out computers (snooping), credit card receipts, etc. are all tools we have learned to use to uncover these horrible A's. <P>The final point to all of this is that once uncovered, then it is up to those involved to admit, decide and agree, move forward with an action plan on a type of recovery. There is always a recovery, just how much and what type. <P>Just my 2 cents. <BR>L.<BR>