again... WOW<P>I have so much respect for those of you who are dealing with infidelity!!!!!<P>I am just dealing with lies.. not an A and I think to myself so many times reading your posts that "There would be no way I could forgive an A.. if I am having so much trouble with lies.." <P>I have always told myself that if an A ever happened, that would be the end..<P>So for all of u who r trying to work thru it..<P>I give u a big {{{{{HUG}}}}} and say "YOU GO FOR IT"<P>I just had to say that<BR>thanks C<P>

Thanks! I'm sure any of us will tell you, I thought the same thing. I didn't think I would EVER put up with an A. I used to think, if he EVER cheats, he's outta here! But then I also used to think, he would NEVER cheat on me. I guess, we never know how we will deal with something until we actually cross the bridge. I won't put up with it twice, though!

I use to think she'd never lie to me..

ditto H2Y<P>When I said I would never mention divorce to my W, I meant it even if we have to climb the emotional mountain (roller coaster) after infidelity.

I too, never thought I would want my H back if he had an A. But we all surprise ourselves in life, huh?<P>I don't know your story, but if all you're dealing with are lies, still beware. That's how things had been between my H and I... he would lie about all sorts of things (mostly about spending family money on stupid little computer and electronic knick-knacks). When I would confront him after discovering his lies, it was in angry outbursts, selfish demands, and disrespectful judgements. If I had known of another way to approach him, then perhaps we wouldn't have gone through the crap we went through (we're in recovery now).<P>So, my message to you, is to read up on here. Learn how to make your marriage stronger NOW. Don't let it fall to pieces that have to be put back together again. You have the tools here, you're extremely fortunate in that respect. I hope you can learn from our situations that you've got such power now. And I hope you can use it wisely.<P>Karen<BR>

cofwill:<P>MB isn't just about infidelity (though that is the shocker that generally wakes the unsuspecting spouse up), it is about building better marriages.<P>Within the scope of Marriage Builders' principles--and the heart of the matter, IMHO--is the rule of honesty.<P>Honesty is the bedrock of any good relationship (marital or not). So, if you are dealing with honesty issues in your marriage, you are in the right place. Read the material (the Concepts link at the top of the page), roll up your sleeves and get to work.<P>The forums are here for you to vent, seek advice, etc. Glad you are here.<P>Godspeed,<BR>STL