So many of you have given me support and good advice the days after I found out about the last PA before the new year and I from my heart I thank-you greatly. I know I should repond back more sorry.<p> Many of you said it was probably time to go to plan B or plan a while he moves out, & if he does not agree to the no contact letter plan b. I think I am ready now for that situation.<p>[ January 17, 2002: Message edited by: Exploding ]</p>

Exploding,<p>Two things. First, I'd highly recommend that you speak to Steve or Jennifer before going to Plan B. You may FEEL ready, but you may not really be, or it may be too soon. That's something you ABSOLUTELY have to be 100% sure of, because if it's going to work to bring WS back, then you have to stick to it. And if it doesn't bring WS back, then you'll have to be ready to be OK with that. It's not something you can go back and forth with, kind of like with giving in to a child...they'll learn that it can be done and play you for the rest of your life.<p>Second, I wouldn't meddle with the A. A lesson I've learned the hard way. What do you suppose would happen if WH found out that you were? Suppose he'd think you had this friend follow her? Suppose he'd resent that you're conspiring against them? I think you know the answers.<p>I'd just leave well enough alone- I know, TERRIBLY difficult, but still probably the right thing to do.<p>Hope this helps some,
Kev

Thanks, Kevco <p>
I have resisted calling OWH to tell about their lastest get together, because then I know I would be the bad guy.<p> Ever since I have first posted I have experienced some earie ? replies, and all have been so on target. Even yours.<p> I have been sooo wanting to post to you, because you live within 60 miles of OW. We live about 300 miles away. I have wanted a male POV to just go and check OW out and watch how she act. I have resisted because I right now I an still angry. <p> I have also wanted to describe the OW and vent. It is ironic because H always comments about if a person has a big nose, OW's is huge.
I had a miscarriage two months ago and it took awhile for my abdomen to get back in (sorta)shape. OW adds weight by getting a puchy middle where mine is usually on the hips. I have lost 10lbs since Nov. My weight is okay, but most over 40 people would like to lose 10 more lbs.
Probably wrote mor than you ever wanted to know. [img]images/icons/blush.gif" border="0[/img] <p> H tells me that OW thinks that I think she is a sl*t You know she is a good christian. Will guess what I didn't even think of her situation or OW actions, I was having a hard enough time trying to understand myself.<p> If that is what H & OW think about herself, then maybe it is true. Any ways I stay far way from that discussion I just let that thought settle in his mind.<p>I have read many of your posts, although I don't presently remember details. But my general impression is that you have gotten stronger in your sense of self and recognizing past mistakes. <p>It is just that I want to see something postive - no contact letter. I think the only reason we are still together is that for the last three years I have just gone into the no-expectations mode and then I won't get hurt. Will I have done that long enough. I see more positive actions from H, but I don't know if they are true and I need the no-contact letter. I know Venting. [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img]<p>[ January 17, 2002: Message edited by: Exploding ]</p>