<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>At 16 month separation, I implemented radical 180's.
He woke up; begged & pleaded with ME to take him back. I acted unsure.
Made him wait, then let him come back.
We have a NEW relationship; VERY wonderful; he has been back 7 months now. We had a poor marriage before, now it is everything I could want. <hr></blockquote><p>I think it would be helpful for us to read about your radical 180's... would you elaborate?<p>Thanks,<p>Trying Again (AKA C A L I)

^^^Bump^^^

Cali, sorry, I just saw your msg. I am not on the boards as much as I used to be.<p>My story is long, LOL. Maybe I can give you the brief version.<p>H and I in 2nd marriages for both of us (his former W left him; I left my abusive alcoholic 1st H); married now 21 1/2 yrs.<p>We had had a bad marriage for around 15 yrs. Mainly the old parallel lives routine that is so common. H is (was) passive-aggressive and conflict avoider. We never did anything together. We took separate vacations--actually I took the vacation (usually with family) while he worked. He did not even want to go on an all-expenses paid cruise to Alaska that my brother paid for when he sold his .com biz. (Told me later he did not want to go ANYWHERE with me). He really hated me...stored up 19 yrs of anger. (and believe me, while not the perfect wife, I am not that much of a b**ch; in fact I was pretty forgiving of some serious scrapes this pillar of the community got into).<p>I accidentally find out H is involved with EA. He says he enjoys being with her (not PA--I had them followed enough that I am sure of that, LOL). She was getting a divorce, 16 yrs younger, needy, used my H for a meal ticket, was upfront with him that she did not want to get serious with ANYONE; wanted to date lots of guys. My H later told me that he thought if he did enough stuff for her and bought her enough things that she would "come around"--NOT, LOL. <p>I begged and pleaded for H not to leave. Told him he had to give her up, go to counselling, and cut down on his work hours. Within a month he was gone...told me what furniture he wanted, rented an apt and left. During that month after I found out, we got along very well, but he did not seem to care. (of course, she was waiting in the wings, or so he thought).<p>After H left, I bought every book known to man and implemented 180's which H noticed (Divorce Busting very helpful at this time to me). Within one month of him leaving, he was "confused, didn't know what he wanted". We had regular times together twice a week (our 17 yr old D went to his apt every weekend)...on Wed we all had dinner together, and on Sun nite, when he brought her home, I cooked dinner. We talked quite a bit, but he was adamant about not coming home. His parents practically disowned him; our whole family was disgusted. I set my goal on us becoming friends again.<p>After abt 6 months I finally succumbed in one of our make-out sessions (these had resumed after he had been gone abt 2 wks, but I would not let him go all the way)....we had really HOT sex.<p>But he did not want it all that much...maybe at best, 2x/month. (He was not getting it elsewhere either. We had agreed that as long as we were still married we would not have sex with anyone else. But I am not naive, so I did have him watched pretty carefully by a friend who is a PI, who told me that there was not anything much going on with EA...she was just using him; they were going back to their respective apts after dinner one night a wk and he went over to her place abt once a wk and took takeout for her and her kids and stayed till around 8 and then went home). From what he told me later when he was in a tell-all mood and trying to get me back, he said he had been chasing her, and she was indifferent at times, and at times she would let him take her out. From what I learned later, she had a couple sugar daddies who gave her money, paid for things, etc that she kept on the string. Beats me why these guys would let her do it as she wasn't all that great to look at and was uneducated and kinda rough (my H has a Masters so he is not totally ignorant).<p>Anyway, we would have sex, he would tell me he did not want me to get any ideas that he was coming back just because we had sex; he would say he was not coming back to the kind of marriage we had before. I would tell him I did not want that kind of marriage either, but we could have a new marriage. I printed out excerpts from HIS NEEDS, HER NEEDS etc. but H would have none of it. H would NOT go to counselling either (said counsellors were the scum of the earth!).<p>We rock along for 15 months in limbo. We have a nice xmas together (he came over xmas eve and spent nite and we went to relatives the next day). We go to a couple of rock concerts and have a good time. Things are going along so well I asked him out to a couple more things and he turned me down. Here we are lovers, and yet I am not even comfortable calling him (the whole time we were separated I basically Plan A'ed him, but did not pursue much; just worked on being his friend and supportive since he was basically always in a bad attitude altho he tried not to show it around me--but at work I hear he was a real pain). My counsellor, Michele W-D said I was in a unique situation and could pursue a little and see what happened. After he declined my invitations, I backed WAY off. Decided here we were still married, were lovers, and still so uncertain with each other, and him still seeing EA. I had had enough of the limbo. It was now 16 months of separation and looked like it would go on for a long time. I had heard that these MLCers can go 1-5 yrs in the fog.<p>I will post this and then continue the saga in my next post. I told you this was loooooonnng.<p>Carol

Part 2.<p>All the time we were separated, I had gone from very low self-esteem, to gaining it back. I looked great (lost a lot of weight), was involved in several civic functions (on 2 boards of directors; one the Opera and the other the Civic Chorale--H was amazed). H saw all this and was impressed with my changes. I got a life (we kidded that he left to get a life, but I was the one who GOT one...all he got was more work..and that is what he basically did, worked, worked, worked...he and his parents own a biz and his mom, who basically runs things, just piled more and more work on him!)<p>Ok, so I am fed up with having a semi-lover with none of the benefits. I want someone who is around, who I can see more often (H not really asking me out all that much; an occasional over-nighter but no real what I would call STEADY dating...remember he does not want me to get the idea he is coming back).<p>So I back off. I guess you would call it my LRT (last resort technique). I hook up with a "coach" who has done a lot of studies on these WS. He tells me things that I say, NO WAY will my H do that--but my H DOES IT! I am blown away. So I pay really close attention to the coach.<p>The main thing he stresses is that the WS has to feel that he is losing you. Just that slight feeling that maybe he does not HAVE you anymore. My H was always SO sure that I wanted him back; that I would be there on the back burner for him...he had thrown me away 16 months previously, but still thought I would be there.<p>We have become friends...he confides in me his troubles, etc. We are having fun together again. But suddenly he senses that I am not as interested in him...I might have other interests...he might be losing me.<p>I did this by a lot of "little" things, that just built up. For example, I would call him on my cell phone and say I would pick up our D on Sun nite since I was "out and about" and how long did it take to get to his place from X town? (knowing that he knew I had flown down to Galveston for the day in a private plane with a "new" friend a couple wks before, and this friend, a guy, just happened to live in X town). BTW, I did not mention to H that I had been flying, our D happened to mention it to him, LOL. My H did not have to know that I was calling from the driveway at my house on my cell, and was not in X town. He assumed I was in X town. It is all in their perception.<p>I started being less available to H. I cancelled some of our regular "dates". Instead of going out to dinner with him and our D on Wed nites, I would drop D off at his work, tell him I had other plans and would pick her up in a few hrs at his place (D told me later H had asked her where I was going, and D said she didn't know, but that I said I was going to see what kind of trouble I could get into and I may have gone to the riverboats in Shreveport--actually I was just killing time in town but he didn't need to know that). Or I was late getting home on Sun nites to cook dinner for him when he brought D in (he did not have to know I was sitting up at the 7-11 drinking cappuchino by myself!).<p>I am very talkative person. H and I would email or IM often (he initiated). I started being brief--to his 4 emails I would write wordy email back once; the others I was brief. On IM's I would cut them off first...same with phone calls. He was stupified. Once he even emailed me back (after I had given very brief reply) and said he could not believe I did not have more to say.<p>He sent email wanting to come and spend night on one Fri nite and work in yard the next day--I declined, saying I had plans, but it would be GREAT if he could come over and work in the yard the next day, but not to get there TOO early as I would be out late on Fri (I went to a play in town by myself, but he didn't need to know that). He showed up the next day to work in the yard! (very unusual as he basically neglected our house/yard while he was gone).<p>The next wk he asked on Wed nite (on our regular dinner date with D) if he could spend the nite on Fri nite--I said OK. Fri nite I am sick so have to cancel. He comes over on Sat. to get D, walks in, my pager is buzzing. He brings it to me, I look at it, then go into ofc and make phone call. (He later told me he heard me say, "I'll call you back later" which is one of HIS lines, to the EA when she would call the ofc and I would be standing there. He says it is ironic that he got me the pager for xmas and other guys are calling me on it...NOT, he just thought that; actually I had paged myself, and then called an imaginary person....again it is perception).<p>While he is waiting for D to get her stuff together, I get a phone call. It is a guy. Guy leaves msg on machine and is saying that the Doobies concert sounds great. Remember H had TURNED DOWN going to the Doobies concert with me. Person calling is "coach" and it is a setup so that H perceives I have other interests. Actually I went on 2 "dates" while separated--both times with friends, who knew I loved H and wanted to get back with him, so not sure you would even call them dates.<p>The next weekend H came over and spent the night Fri nite, and the next day we had to take our really old dog to the vet and have her put down. She had had a really bad stroke. We both bawled like babies, and it was a really bonding time. We brought her back and buried her in the back yard.<p>On Wed the following week, while having dinner together out with D, he said he would like to get our D on Fri nite; if I wanted to bring her over and spend the nite that was OK but he had to work the next day. I said that worked out well for me as I could drop her off as I had plans.<p>I emailed his daughter (my stepdaughter) who works for him for the address of her lawyer (her H left her). Asked how long it took to get into this lady lawyer. Step-D says it takes quite a while because she is good.<p>I call lawyer, get an apt for the next wk. Email step-D back and say, hey it's amazing, but I got an appt. for next wk! And maybe she should not tell her daddy, that I will when the time is right. (of course I was counting on her TELLING her daddy, which she DID of course, LOL)<p>I will post this and continue the saga in another post.<p>Carol
PS. I hope this is helpful. I kept a diary so I am referring back to it.

Carol!<p>This is so fascinating. I can't wait to read the rest. I've heard such good things about Michelle Werner-Davis. And I'm DYING to know who "coach" is.<p>Please HURRY!<p>On pins and needles ...
Jo

Part 3.
On Fri nite I show up at H's work with D to leave her with him. I am dressed to kill. I make sure H goes to get D's suitcase out of trunk and sees my slinky black cocktail dress and suitcase there...I am off to the riverboats to see Doobies! (remember I asked H first to go, but he DECLINED). I do not mention my suitcase but say I do not know abt cooking dinner on Sun as I do not know what I will be doing, so we will forget having dinner together then. BTW, EA is at ofc talking to step-D (they are great friends; why not they are close in age, LOL). I am pleasant, but stay only a few minutes..I am anxious to get to the concert! Actually I did go to the concert, but by myself of course. I came back that nite too!<p>On Mon, I get email from H asking me out to dinner at steakhouse on Fri night, and for me to spend the night too!...mind you, H is notorious for not asking me out till the last minute...asking me out this far ahead is UNHEARD of. I do not answer email till Tues nite (I know this will drive him WILD). Tell him that I would enjoy dinner, but can't spend the night as I have "plans" early the next day.<p>H says he will take what he can get, and from this point on, I see a RADICAL change in him. He mentions that he had a WAKEUP call on the weekend.<p>Now H is in HOT PURSUIT. It is unbelievable.<p>H is so solicitous with me. He can not do enough for me. But I still distance. I cannot just fall in his arms, or it will not last!<p>We have a great dinner, a great talk afterward sitting in the car at his apt till late (H is notorious for yawning abt 8:30 and being ready for bed...this nite he is talking avidly and doesn't want me to go). Finally I leave, but it is late.<p>The next day I am supposed to have plans, so I decide I will go to town and hit the bookstore. I get up late cause I got in late from having dinner with H. At 12 noon my phone rings. It is H. I do not answer.<p>About 30 min. later he drives up (he lives abt 30 miles away). I look out there (I am still in PJ's), go to door and say, what are you doing here? He says he came for the lawnmower (YEAH RIGHT). BTW, H has key to house; I never changed the locks because I always wanted him to feel like it was his home still).<p>He gets the lawnmower, then comes in and we chat a little. Told him I postponed my plans till later cause I got in so late.<p>Then somehow it all comes tumbling out. Says he is a [censored], says he was SO stupid, says he wants me back. I am dumbfounded. He talks and talks; spills his guts. I say I will have to think about it as I had been to a lawyer about a divorce because I thought that was what HE wanted. He says NO, he wants us to get back together. We talk for a few hours and then he leaves. (He later told me he had come to the house thinking I was gone to check and see if my suitcase was gone...if it had been he said he would have been desolate)<p>I told him I did not know what I would be doing on Sun., so we would cancel me cooking him dinner and just to bring D back anytime.<p>Sun. I am in town killing time around the time he would be bringing D back. I get a page. H is actually only one who has my pager number so I know it is him. I ignore it. I get another page. Finally I call him on my cell phone.<p>He is crying, he is saying he had only got 3 hrs sleep nite before, he is saying he had conference call with his 2 daughters telling them he was going to try to win me back, etc, and that they had better treat me with the upmost respect. He asks me if I am intimate with other guy...says he has his address and phone number and feels like going over there and punching him out (this is SO UNLIKE my H). I tell him it is none of his business as he threw me away 16 months ago and dumped me for EA. He says he knows, but he is still my H. Actually I saw the "other" guy once, and it was just a friends thing as he knew I wanted back with my H...but my H seems to think we were having a flaming affair.<p>I find out later my H has driven 60 miles round trip that morning to check and see if my car was home early (wanting to see if I spent the night "out"). I never dreamed he would go out of his way to check on me (coach had warned me he would do this, and I said, "No way")<p>He says he is calling from my house. I say I am parked along the side of the road taking the call (I was). He says he is going to go to EA's house and finish it with her. I tell him he does not have to do that...everyone needs friends. He says he has to do it, because he does not ever want me to worry about her. I say, whatever, but I am not telling you what to do (he said before that I am too controlling...actually he is just passive-aggressive and they all think the spouse is controlling even tho we might not be!) So we hang up.<p>I will continue this in another post. I didn't realize I was going to be so wordy. Hopefully this will help others have hope, even when things seem dark.<p>Carol

OMG!!!!!!<p>I can't stand it when you stop ... I'm DYING HERE!!!<p>I cannot believe how things turned around, this perception jealousy thing is VERY powerful ... I had NO idea!<p>I'm hittin the hay, but gettin up early to read the rest. I hope all my buds (BS) here get to read this too. It feels SO SO good to have a WS chase the BS.<p>I'm smiling so big, thanks Carol!<p>Lv,
Jo

Carol, thanks, this is amazing... I may want to talk to michele w-d... I have her book divorce busting... and have put forth a bit of her prescribed methods... but it did not do me much good... yet... but I see the advantage.s WOW... That is waht I need.. but I am only 4 months into the game and getting tired... my h only now broke off the bs with the ow... this is amazing I know... with help of a mb therapist in houston... and her still being with her H.. the ow that is... my h didn't like being 2nd fiddle...anyway... my h says he is a victim, and I am awful and drove him away... baloney...but anyway... I am hoping.. I appreciate your posts. and would like to print and save.. these are incredible... I may employ some of the techniques...<p>does your h know your tricks now?<p>HOney

Part 4
I get home, and a little while later get email from H that he has done what he said he would do (broken it off with EA). Found out later he told her that they needed to break things off, she said, well can we still be friends, and he said, "No, I have lied to Carol too much and I do not want to lie anymore." And she said, well whatever makes you happy. He told her he had been unhappy for a long time (and he had, I could tell by his depression and the way he treated others...at the time he told me he did not feel guilty abt leaving me and getting involved with EA, but later admitted that he knew it was wrong and felt really bad abt it...H has always been a faithful churchgoer.)<p>I also found out later that he came back to my house that night just to see if I had come home.<p>From this point on, H is pursuing me like crazy; I am backing off. I used reverse psychology on him. I would tell him things like, "Just because things didn't work out with EA, there are some nice single ladies out there, let me introduce you to some of my nice single friends." I would say things like, "I know what I want now, and I do not want the kind of marriage we had. There are issues you have that have nothing to do with me (I was referring mainly to his passive-aggressiveness and the continual problems at work between him and his mother, who is the boss)." I would tell him I had worked a lot on myself with self help books, etc. (meanwhile he had not even cracked a book).<p>He said he wanted to change, and wanted me to suggest some books for him to read. He said he would do ANYTHING to win me back. Said he didn't think he could ever make up for the pain he had caused me, but he knew now how that pain felt (thinking I was interested in someone else). He told me that he had cried out to God to forgive him, and he wasn't going to let the devil get him. Mind you, he had been SO DEPRESSED and in such a raunchy attitude for the past 1 1/2 yrs. He would tell me such drivel abt how I was selfish and controlling and he never got to do what he wanted to our whole marriage. He was singing a different tune now. Said that 90 percent of problems in our marriage was HIS fault (which is quite a change from EVERYTHING being MY fault!).<p>Actually he even told me he felt like he had been in a fog for the past 2 yrs. I could not believe it when he said that; it was straight out of the MLC handbook!<p>H starts asking me out all the time. He was calling me alot, emailing, you name it (what a change). Finally, after he sent me an email asking me to go to 3 different functions (Oak Ridge Boy's concert, Opera benefit which he had declined before telling me he didn't associate with those society people, and my chorale concert which he had declined the last one that I sang in and said it was not high on his priority), I told him to BACK OFF because he was pushing me too hard and he would lose me (this on advice of coach). He emailed me back and said he would back off a little; he would give ME time, because I had given him time (I waited on him A LONG time...over a yr without much encouragement).<p>Coach said I had been giving my H too much "emotional nookie" for quite some time and to back off. H had to feel the lack of it. Very critical these first few weeks to not give back more than about 70 percent emotionally or H would leave again, and probably be gone for good.<p>I was very careful. I was determined I would not go thru this mess ever again. For 1 1/2 yrs I was totally depressed and unhappy because H was gone (even tho I didn't let him see that side of me).<p>Meanwhile, H is being SOOOOOO romantic. I am getting mushy cards in the mail twice a week. He sent a dozen roses (he had NEVER sent me flowers before). He is calling me up all the time and also emailing me. One that meant a lot to me was when he first told me he loved me. He said he had not told me that in a very long time, but he truly did love me. He said I was a pearl of great price and he didn't want to lose me.<p>People, this man did not tell me he loved me for probably 9 yrs. You do not know how much it meant to me to hear him say that to me!<p>But I still held back. Meanwhile, H says he wants to go to counselling with me (FAINT). I set up counselling session via telephone with coach...on communication in marriage (which is something H and I REALLY lacked). We had a great session. Coach hooked us up with John Gottman's book and we began reading it to each other as our "homework". H asked for my recommendation on books also, and I set him up with the Mars/Venus book.<p>Things rock along for a few months, and H is slowly winning me back, hehe. But I am still holding back and have not told him we are getting back together.<p>More later.<p>Carol

AAAAAAAGGGHHHH! This is like if I saw the Fellowship of the Ring movie without having read the next book!!!!<p>I am in awe!

Part 5
Good thing I am self-employed. I can sleep in, hehe. But I want to get this finished tonight, then maybe I can answer some questions later.<p>H asks me if I will go to Marriage Enrichment dinner at his church. I say yes. We go have nice dinner, and guess what? The topic is the book, HIS NEEDS, HER NEEDS. I laugh and tell H I have already read that book many times, LOL. In fact I tried to tell him some of the stuff in there last yr! H says, but I was not ready to hear it then...NOW I am! H pays lots of attention to session and we have good discussion later.<p>H starts coming over and doing things at the house. He has let the yard go for around 15 yrs (we have 3/4 acre) so there is much to do! I want the fish pond redone, so we start on that...he goes and buys 400. bucks worth of rock and redoes the waterfall; we get a new liner, it is looking great...H says he wants it to be nice for me because I so enjoy going out there and sitting and listening to the water. Can you believe this folks? I am in heaven. He wasn't this attentive when we were going together the first time 20 yrs ago!<p>But finally, when I see that H has made some changes himself, and has worked on problems we have discussed that need to be taken care of so that our marriage could have a good chance, I tell him to give his 30 day notice at his apt and that he can come home at the end of that time. (this is 2 months after he first told me he wanted to come back). I wanted him to wait another month to cement things, as coach said that there needs to be about a 4 month time frame where you are gradually restoring the emotional "giving" to the WS...you cannot do it all at once or you risk them leaving again. After this time, you have cemented that love in there pretty good, and the marriage will most likely last.<p>3 wks later H moved back in. About a month later, H, D and I drove out to Calif. for a 2 week camping vacation reunion at the beach with my family. Mind you, H had not taken off more than maybe a day in years. I could not believe it when he did this. He said it was important to him to do this for me...he was a little apprehensive about how my family would react to him, but it went well. I had told my family how good he was treating me, and that was what they were concerned with. They knew how miserable I had been while separated. My dad said he was so glad to see me smile now!<p>H has been moved back 7 months now. We had such a bad marriage before, that I could only dream abt what a good one was like. I still pinch myself thinking I am in a dream. We truly DO have a new relationship. I knew I wanted one like my parent's who have been married almost 60 years. H and I had such a dysfunctional marriage before....I learned so much from all the different books I read, that it has helped me tremendously now in knowing what to do. I have seriously considered going back to school for my Masters and becoming a marriage counsellor. I think there are a lot of marriages that could be saved. Divorces are too prevalent.<p>One thing I asked H when he was trying to win me back was, "what will we do if it goes back like it was?". He said, well now we will TALK about it and work it out....before he would avoid conflict and we would not talk; and his anger would just store up. Now he is much more understanding. We talk about how we each are, about our little foibles so to speak. Things that bothered us before do not bother us anymore...I guess you would say we are more tolerant.<p>We spend a lot of time together now. Before, he said if I decided I was going to go to his office and work that he would shut the doors and close it down (he did not want me around). Now he wants me to do sales for him, which I have been doing on a part time basis--it helps us keep connected. And we are doing a joint biz that is related to my other biz (in the craft field).<p>He complained before that he never felt equal to me in our marriage. I always thought it was like we were on opposite sides fighting against each other, not with each other.<p>Now we feel more like a team. We are going to church every Sunday together...we did not do this before as I was raised in a totally different religion. This is drawing us together as well and forging our bond.<p>I know it will not be a totally smooth sailing from here on out...we are going to have our problems along the way just as everyone does, if for no other reason than the Mars/Venus thing. But we now have the tools to deal with those problems.<p>I hope my little saga has been somewhat helpful. A year ago I was in the darkest despair. I was at the bottom of the pit. My H and I had been separated 16 months, had even been having the greatest sex EVER for around a year, and still we were in LIMBO, with no end in sight (he admitted later we would have gone on like that for a LONG time...he had the best of both worlds...hot sex/companionship with me WHEN he wanted it; able to see EA when he wanted; able to do what he wanted because he lived by himself--why would he want to give THAT up?).<p>And look at me today. My H tells me many times a day he loves me; he is affectionate (he knows this is one of my EN's); we talk; we work together as a team; our D has her daddy home all the time!<p>LIFE IS GOOD! Don't give up! It is worth it.<p>Carol

carol,
You have given me a glimmer of hope. Thank you.
Made an appt!!!!!!
jan<p>[ January 18, 2002: Message edited by: jcan60 ]<p>[ January 18, 2002: Message edited by: jcan60 ]</p>

Bump^

Thank you ... thank you...<p>I wasn't on boards last night and actually <gasp> have to teach today... so I hadn't seen this yet...<p>Thanks resilient and daybreak for the bumps...<p>Cali

WOW!!!Carol, thank you for sharing and keeping the journal to refer back to. I wish I would've kept a journal for myself through all of this.<p>
Could you elaborate more on this "Coach", please?<p>And what type of craft business do you have may I ask? I have tried doing the craft business from home and have not been successful thus far. Email if you would rather not discuss it here.<p>Thanks for the time you put into posting your story.<p>What made you come here in Aug of this past year?<p>Dawn

What an inspirational success story!! Thank you so much for taking the time to write it all down for us!
BH

Daybreak, in answer to your questions:<p>I actually came to this site a few yrs back, but I only registered in Aug. because, if I remember correctly, I wanted to post to someone. I usually hung out on the Divorce Busting BB and posted there, mainly in Midlife. I was counselling with Michele W-D, so that seemed like the logical place, since it is her site.<p>I am in the designing/publishing side of the craft biz.<p>I was making progress, but not fast enough (my counsellor said I was on my H's timetable, NOT mine). At 16 months limbo (and considering that we were lovers, with a LOT of interaction), I was just tired of the uncertainty and decided to try this coach who had been recommended to get FAST results. He had developed a pretty radical approach of 180's etc. I decided to give it the old college try and if it didn't help, I was prepared to go on with my life and divorce H (after all, that was what he wanted, wasn't it??).<p>Hope this answered your questions. I posted my story mainly to give people hope that there are some successes out there. It may take awhile, and you have to be patient. But the outcome can be really great, as in my case. Look at the good marriage I have now, whereas before I was in a lousy relationship with the same guy for YEARS.<p>Carol

Carol,<p>Can I please email you? If so, can you place your email here. <p>Jo

<p>[ May 08, 2002: Message edited by: carolkh ]</p>

Hi Carol! What an enthralling story! Great to see the good guy win sometimes. <p>You must live close to me since you mentioned the boats in Shreveport, we live in Longview. In fact, we went to the casinos last weekend. <p>Thanks for the happy ending!<p>[ January 19, 2002: Message edited by: MelodyLane ]</p>