Hi Everyone. I'm another of the Redbook Riff Raff people. My name is the same here as it was on Redbook, but my friends call me Elf. Well, to introduce myself properly, here's my story.<p>Seven years ago next May, my only child (10 year old daughter) was killed in a car accident. A year after that, my now exhusband fell in love with my best friend. And a year after that we divorced. There was absolutely no chance to rebuild that marriage (even though it had lasted 20 years) because he completely refused any rebuilding efforts. He just wanted out. At the time, I was still reeling with grief over losing my daughter and I never felt the full force of emotions surrounding my WS's betrayal. They came later, of course, actually after the divorce was final. Since we've been divorced for 5 years now, I have had a great deal of time of process all of the pain, rage, etc. and have moved on in my life. A year ago last October, I got remarried to an old high school/college sweetheart and we are doing well and very happy.<p>I came to the women.com message board quite awhile ago in an attempt to help resolve lingering pain from what happened with my WS. What I found there amazed me and has helped me so much with my personal issues and continued growth. So now, here I am, following my friends and hoping to give help where I can, continue to learn and with a strong determination to make this new marriage succeed to the fullest.<p>Thanks to everyone here who has offered the Riff Raff a new home. And I apologize if there are any problems with my first attempt at posting here. I'm a little "technologically challanged" but I'll catch on soon! Promise!<p>Elf

ELF!! SO good to see you here! Your story just reminds me again of how closely I came to doing the same thing to H and I. I'm so glad that my walls finally came down enough to do the right thing! I'll have to get my story out here one of these days...ugh.<p>Technologically challenged? Oh please..I'm a total computer geek and I still mess this stuff up, LOL! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

Hope!!! Well at least you got the little green guy with the teeth working! I'll get used to all of this eventually.<p>Ugh indeed about posting our stories. Sometimes it just seems to exhaust me to type it out again. Still, it does seem only fair. When I first came to women.com, I didn't have the nerve to do that so my story had to come out in bits and pieces over a long period of time. Easier this way (to just get it over with) even though I did have to take several deep breaths before I wrote it.<p>Gotta go for awhile. We're house hunting (with no luck so far. Very discouraging) so lets keep our fingers crossed that this one will actually be "the one." Be back later.<p>Great to see you!!!<p>Elf

Hi, you Eflin thang! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Good to see you here!!!!!!<p>To add the emoticons just click and wherever your cursor is....that's where your [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] will show up. Sometimes it shows up at the end of your text and you have to highlight it and drag it to where you want it. <p>I'm telling ya, I'm so excited about these little critters [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] I just don't know how to handle myself! [img]images/icons/cool.gif" border="0[/img] <p>You can also use bold and italics. There is a post here from Orchid (very helpful) and she gives alot of useful information and links.<p>This looks like a REALLY GOOD place.<p>love ya,<p>sel

Elf,<p>Welcom to you and your friends her!! Thanks to all of you for posting your stories. I did check out the forum where you were before and it was a little hard to navigate so I hope you find this easier.<p>My sympathies go out to you at the loss of your daughter, I am sure that it was hard for you to type your story.<p>I am glad to see that you have found love once again after your marriage broke down.<p>I am sure that you will have lots to contribute here, we just got to get you guys from talking to each other all the time, kind of like at school when there was that one group that set at the "cool" table and everyone wanted to be part of that group!!<p>God bless to all, Dawn

ROTLMAO! Yea...we're kind of "exclusive"...NOT! I've been making my mark all over the place. We're kind of like a virus...we start in one location and next thing you know we're ALL OVER THE PLACE. LOL! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

ROTLMAO! Ok what does this mean?
Dawn<p>[ February 17, 2002: Message edited by: daybreak ]</p>

Hey Elfie girl! How are ya lady? It's SO nice to see you. So far I am loving it here. This seems like a wonderful place that will allow us to continue to grow.<p>It IS Marriagebuilders after all. How incredible!!!

Daybreak! (Hope4future wrote it wrong.. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] )<p>ROFLMAO = roll on floor, laugh my [censored] off<p>Sometimes, when I'm feeling wicked .... I'll say:<p>ROFLMAOPIMP........ It took Selket forever to figure that one out! Can you guess? (**Hint ... full bladder while laughing = not so good situation)<p>Pepper

Got it!!!<p>I work in a special ed classroom and have very low functioning HS students and I was teaching them netettiquete (sp) and what some of the different letters put together meant, that is one that I will for go sharing with them though!!!<p>D

OK Pepper, now you have me LMAO! I think I'm in a silly mood. You're funny!!!<p>Love ya,
Clear

LOL! Yup, I forgot what the heck I was rollin on...:-)

Daybreak<p>Thanks for the welcome and (personally) thanks for your condolences.<p>We really aren't trying to be the "cool table". From my perspective, I just think we're trying to settle into our new home and I, for one, am feeling a little overwhelmed. This is a huge site with so many posters. It's going to take a little time for me to get to know your stories and in the meantime, it's comfortable to talk to people I already know. Just give it a day or two. We'll all fall into the greater scheme of things.<p>Look forward to talking to you in the future. And thanks again for the welcome.<p>Elf

You people are great. Really refreshing to have some laughs once in awhile. Those of us who have been around for awhile tend to get overwhelmed with all the new pain. From all I have seen so far, you folks are a great asset to this site.<p> Please, consider going to the mainpage of this site and familarizing yourselves with the principles of the Harleys. The information will add to your own healings, as well as give you some terrific information for helping all the new souls who come to this place.<p> If only I had had this site when the communication first started to wane in my marriage. See, I knew I wasn't being a very good husband several years ago. But I simply didn't know what to do about it. I didn't remember how to show my wife the love I held for her.<p> Then the affairs started. Now every day is a tremendous struggle. I love her in spite of what she is/has done. But I awaken to the end a little more each day. <p> Found OM #3s cell phone hidden in the trunk of her car. I found this last Thursday. Yep....Valentines Day. <p> Letting go is getting easier each day. <p> jd

Hi, JD.....<p>You are a Sweetie! Yep, we can be pretty rambunctious (I know I spelled that wrong [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] ) at times.<p>Have you seen the movie Steel Magnolias (it's a girlie movie).....anyway....Dolly Parton has a line in that movie and it goes like this.....<p>"Laughter through tears is my favorite emotion".<p>That's how I relate to these gals. We've laughed together and cried together. We've had our catfights and we've bonded. Sometimes the pain can be soooo overwhelming and the tension can be sooo strong the we just have to get silly [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] to keep from going crazy.<p>Wow.....you know....your situation sounds very much like my marriage was. I can so relate to what your wife is doing. I will try to read some of your posts so that I can get a better understanding of you. <p>We came from a *women's* community so it was a pretty unusual for a man to come in and open up to us. That is one really big difference I can see here. Men and women alike post about the same kinds of problems but from different perspectives.<p>Thanks for the suggestion on reading the main page...I can imagine that not reading the main stuff and going straight to the message board would be like reading a book without knowing the title [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img] . You've been really nice.<p>selket

Yeah,<p>Pepperday was ROTFLMAOPIMP'ing for a loooong time before I figured her out! [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] <p>What a hoot! <giggle giggle> <p>I thought she was insulting someone by using the word "pimp"...little did I know what she was really doing! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>selket