Funny how you start to notice things... <p>My H hasn't 'reached' out to me in a long time... you know... the pat on the back... the touch on your shoulder... a simple caress...<p>Yesterday we went to his Uncle's house for brunch and I was helping in the kitchen... when he passed by me he reached out and touched my side... you know... the kind that says thanks for helping... I'm glad you're here... <p>I've also seen more looks toward me and smiles... and best of all... in bed... he is not keeping himself 'apart' from me like he was... for so long since d-day... it was face turned away from me... rigid next to me... (until he went to sleep when his body would unconsciously move towards me.)... <p>Everyday... EVERYDAY... I am seeing more and more of my husband... <p>I am sitting here crying because I am so greatful for a second chance.<p>Hugs and smiles and prayers to you all...<p>Cali

Yep, I went through this. It's such a relief isn't it?<p>Keep it up and before you know it, he'll be snuggling right up to you in bed!<p>I refer to my H as my personal BTU (British Thermal Units) generator for those coooooold winter nights! He's better than any electric blanket! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

That is great news Cali,<p>I remember when we went through that--it felt great. It is like all of a sudden the FOG has cleared and things move back to normal. I am happy for you. Pat

I am VERY happy for you too, Cali. You've done so good! So has Eff'd up. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Jo

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Cali:
<strong>Funny how you start to notice things... <p>My H hasn't 'reached' out to me in a long time... you know... the pat on the back... the touch on your shoulder... a simple caress...<p>
I've also seen more looks toward me and smiles... and best of all<p>Cali</strong><hr></blockquote><p>This is something that is definately missing in my marriage. My husband doesn't demonstrate any of this and thinks that saying "I love you" is all he has to do. Better yet, since he doesn't do these things, it often makes me wonder if he DOES, in fact, really love me.

[img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/cool.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/cool.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/cool.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/cool.gif" border="0[/img]

THANK YOU FOR THAT WONDERFUL POST<p>I am having a great day knowing you have come thru so much, and now look at you! that could be ME/US too! <p>thanks! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

So glad for you Cali....you so deserve this second chance....you planned A for so long.<p>Did like the pictures, definately a cute couple.<p>Dawn [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

Thanks all for comments...<p>BR... sometimes you just have to look for and be happy w/ small changes... <p>mnm... thanks... I know it is hard for you right now...<p>resilient... one day maybe efft will appreciate MB...<p>melody... no "I love yous" yet here... but I keep plugging along... it'll happen...<p>sing... did you get the help you needed on your test? been thinking about that... thanks for your smiles...<p>digitalslavery... I used to read this kinda stuff and be so jealous... yet hopeful... time, patience, faith and belief...<p>daybreak... email away on other topic... I'm logging off and going to bed... Midol is finally kicking in [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] ... thanks for comments on pics... <p>Cali

[img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] and [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] <p>- Freddy

[img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] It all comes in baby steps...good for you Cali [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

Cali,<p>Thanks for asking about the test. I think it is alright, the main problem I spent so long working & reworking it that I have done the busy work that goes with it. Like anyone really makes Test Specifcation Table, Test Aligment Table, etc....But my test is great, my former students couldn't have passed it even with review because the would have had to THINK, something no one ever taught them do. <p>I need to get back to work, it is due tonight

Cali,<p>I used to feel like MelodyLane, that the absence of casual touches, comments and just plain care were the true indication of my W's feelings. She would make the "required" efforts, but no more, and even seemed to avoid unnecessary contact. She seemed to be annoyed all the time.<p>Quite a difference since June. This is the kind of stuff that convinces me she cares, that we really will be ok. One nice thing for me: holding hands. We have always held hands when we were in public. At night now (bed), sometimes she will search out my hand, take it and pull me close to snuggle tightly. All my cares melt away.<p>It really is the "little" things... the things that we don't expect. I think it's their way of proving that they care. If they do something we "expect" we don't always give them "credit" for it. I know that I behave that way sometimes- looking for expected actions, getting angry when I don't see them, instead of being happy when I did...<p>A toast to casual touches and may you see more in your future. Cheers.<p>Jeffers

Yes, those touches and "little" things do mean so much...enjoy them and reciprocate them and be patient. The I Love You's will come. Mine finally did after TWO YEARS- in a frenzy and he couldn't say it enough, and I knew he meant it.
So many many times I bit my lip because I wanted him to just SAY IT darn it, but he needed to get to that place on his own....<p>You're doin' just fine....