Venus,
I'm sorry I wasn't here at the beginning of this, but I do have a small bit to share....about your H's "unburdening" of the truth. My H did the same, came clean....to me, to our children....it made me SICK to see the smile of contentment on his face, as if by telling the truth it absolved him of the behavior....Venus, my H came clean several times over the course of the last year...only problem was that each time it was because he'd gotten caught. Your H got caught by a friend...who was going to tell you....to me, it looked like he was trying to save his own skin! Venus, my H and I got divorced last Friday....want to know why? Because 3 weeks ago (2 weeks after my kids and I moved out of our home) my H calls me and says he's made the biggest mistake of his life...he says he loves me, wants to become friends again and try on the marriage eventually....he says he's trying to find a way to break it off with OW, but just can't figure out what her hold on him is....I listened for over an hour without saying a word...the only thing I'd agree to was not filing divorce...I told him if he wanted me, it was time to "WALK THE WALK" and quit just "TALKING THE TALK!" I'd been hearing various versions of all that crap before...got my hopes up, only to find out he was back with OW yet again. Well, over the course of the next 2 weeks, I found out that my H had joined a DART LEAGUE with OW (you know, the one he was TRYING to break up with; GIVE ME A BREAK)....then one night, our girls called him to say goodnight, like they always do....well he was at darts with OW....he said to our daughter "Julie, talk to LISA while I take my turn...." That did it for me...I was done...absolutely, finally, completely done. The next day I called our county to find out how I could file for divorce on my own (no attorneys)...I filled out all the forms, had my H come over the next day....we signed them, I filed them a week ago Friday, and 2 days ago...we were granted the divorce.<p>Sorry to go on so long...I pray that your H isn't jacking you around...the bottom line for me is that my H has made no changes in his behaviors...he's still selfish, self-centered and a BIG TIME conflict avoider. I mean, people start and end relationships every day....if he truly loved me after the year of hell he'd just put me through, he COULD and WOULD have broken it off with OW.<p>Love you and praying for you....Go back and print all of Bramble's responses....she's incredible...she should be a RELATIONSHIP COUNSELOR in my opinion.<p>PEACE!<p>MOM