You've gotten some great advice...to see your lawyer and see if it would be possible to rent your house out without losing your rights to it.<p>Personally, though, I kinda like the idea of becoming the neighbor from hell..... [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img]

I hope that is possible to rent the house. that way I will be able to have some peace and not have to live like this anymore. thanks LC. Your support is appreciated.
BH

Before I sign off for the night, I just wanted to say THANKS to everyone here. I don't know how I could have got through this night without the support of all of you. My plan B letter will be given to H tomorrow and I will be seeing my lawyer to see what I can do to get myself into a better situation. I can not and will not live next door to this any longer. I HAVE HAD ENOUGH.
Thanks again for the support! I truly believe I have done all that I can do.
BH

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>I will never understand how people can do this to someone they supposedly loved. <hr></blockquote><p>The bizarre thing about the behavior of WS is that what they do, they would not do to ANYBODY else if the behavior were PUBLIC. It would be universally condemned.<p>No society with any kind of conscience or respect for the individual would accept this kind of treatment of one human being by another. No one in society would accept ANY justification for such behavior. It is WRONG by any standard.<p>Yet, this kind of behavior is rampant within the privacy of the marital relationship. It's so hard to accept that our loved ones have become evil. I love the statement: It's about them; it's not about you. NOTHING a BS does (in a tpical marriage, anyway) can ever justify or excuse such behavior. They are behaving this way because there is some huge emotional and moral weakness.<p>There has to be an accounting some day. I believe that your H is going to have huge emotional problems one day.<p>Did you see the report that ex-Mayor Rudy Guiliani was denied physical custody of his children and that his OW cannot stay over when they are with him? I guess there is some justice. I thought I was the only one in the world who does not think his adultery was OK and his relationship with OW wonderful. After 9/11 he was all over the media praising OW. I felt bad for his wife to have him flaunt his affair so publicly.<p>I hope you are asleep and don't read this until the morning. [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Estes<p>[ March 18, 2002: Message edited by: Estes49 ]</p>

Thanks Estes. I did get a little sleep. Now I have to go to work...YUCK!! Julie (the OW) actually said "this has nothing to do with you...we both love you"! I know that someday, some way, they will both realize what they have done and have to live with the knowledge that they have destroyed two families...not to mention the many friendships. Have a nice day Estes. I don't have access to the internet at work, so I will come back tonight.<p>Thanks again everyone for helping me get through last night. You guys are the best!!
BH

((((((((HUGS))))))))))<p> Oh I get it. It was love that drove her to have an A with your H. How nice of her.
Stay strong. I can't imagine gong through this. You hve to take care of yourself. Consider some anti-depressants. I know a lot of us here are under so much stress. They really do help. Crying that much is not healthy. Depression can do horrible things to your body.
I see no advantage to being nice thru this. When I divorced my abusive alcoholic ex-H I tried to be nice and he really took advantage of it and came real close to screwing me over big time.
He is a pig. Don't be nice to pigs. MAKE BACON INSTEAD!!!!
Please keep us posted as to whast you found out with your lawyer. You really need to get out of there. For your own mental health. Do you have any kids living at home with you?
Hang in there. Momrat<p>________________________________________________
Married 6 years
5 kids
EA by H on the internet off and on for 5 years

BH,<p>Since I know you're too much a lady to do it, I left a flaming bag of dog poop on their doorstep this morning. You should have seen his face when he stomped the fire out!!!! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] (If that doesn't make you laugh, nothing will. Put some poop (fresh, of course) on their doorstep.<p>I'm so mean. But damn, they are really a couple of b*tches. Him, too.<p>What did the lawyer say? <p>Nothing but love for you.

Well, here is the update. I spoke with the lawyer today and he told me we could petition the court to get the house on the market, considering the cirumstances, he didn't think that would be a problem. THEN....my H called about an hour after that and told me that my daughter had sent him an email and after reading that, he has decided to sign the paper after all. So...he is coming over tonight to sign!! YEAH!! Well, now I am on the up part of the rollercoaster ride. We will see what tomorrow brings! <p>Diddallas..I actually thought about doing the dog poop, but since he is parking in front of my house, I was going to put it right by the door of his van. He goes to work pretty early in the AM and it is still dark so he wouldn't see it! I know I couldn't do that, but it makes me smile to think about it!! <p>Lady C...I like your neighbor from hell idea too! Hmmm....I will have to try to come up with a plan!!<p>I feel a lot better today and thanks all of you for helping me through this. It is snowing outside, but I feel like the sun is shining!!<p>The soap opera continues....tune in tomorrow!
BH

Great news!<p>I tell ya, the WS absolutely has radar on the BS's emotions and movement. He decided to sign right in the nic of time. Hmmph!<p>So, now I think you owe yourself a nice long HOT bath and a very long nap .... what say you, BH?<p>Lv,
Jo

Sounds like a great idea Jo!! I feel like such a weight has been lifted! He should be here within the hour to sign. I came home from work early to make sure he actually signs it! Thanks Jo.. for everything!
BH

Broken,<p>I hate to say this but I feel your pain. My wife (although hasnt officailly admitted it) is having an affair with our next door neighbor. The kicker was that we had our home for sale and had a buyer and both found a great new house. Then two weeks before closing D-day hit. I wasnt sure then hwo it was cause she denied it (and still does somewhat). I now know who it is and kick myself for not going through with the purchase originally. Anyway....I know how being in a house with the OP next can be. It is Hell and my BUTT in on fire right now. <p>I feel your pain.

bh,
Maybe you can't do it but YOUR DOG can. I'd just lead him over there and hold him in place until he finished his business. Hope you live someplace cold because dog poop doesn't really, really smell until the car heater warms your shoes up real good. [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] <p>But then again, *I* COULD do it!<p>Glad you got good news from the lawyer.

LMAO!!! Diddallas!!!!<p>I vote an old fishie placed strategically under his driver's seat. Salmon would probably be the most effective, has an oder when rotting that would peel the paint off a wall. <p>Jo<p>[ March 18, 2002: Message edited by: Resilient ]</p>

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Just a Husband:
Broken,<p>I hate to say this but I feel your pain. My wife (although hasnt officailly admitted it) is having an affair with our next door neighbor. The kicker was that we had our home for sale and had a buyer and both found a great new house. Then two weeks before closing D-day hit. I wasnt sure then hwo it was cause she denied it (and still does somewhat). I now know who it is and kick myself for not going through with the purchase originally. Anyway....I know how being in a house with the OP next can be. It is Hell and my BUTT in on fire right now. <p>I feel your pain.<hr></blockquote><p>I'm sooooo sorry JustaHusband,<p>It's horrible how someone who loves you can treat you with such blatant disrespect. It's criminal.<p>I think you and BH should stay in close touch to help one another thru this "Next Door Neighbor CRAPPOLA".<p>People's actions never cease to amaze me. <p>Please know you're in my thoughts.<p>Lv,
Jo<p>[ March 18, 2002: Message edited by: Resilient ]</p>

BH
What a relief. Did you know your daughter was going to contact him. I think sometimes it takes an outside person to make you see the error in your ways.
Have you been able to look for another place?
Please get some rest tonight and take care of yourself. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Momrat

BH,<p>I am so sorry that this is happening. I don't know where I was that I missed this yesterday, I am sorry!!<p>I hope things are going better, when does WH plan on coming over to sign papers?<p>Please let us know how this goes. Keep your head held high, you haven't done anything wrong and should not be made to feel bad.<p>Take Care
Dawn

My husband came over tonight and signed the paper!! I am soooo relieved! He was actually pleasant...it is so weird, like Jeckyl and Hyde!<p>JaH...I am so very sorry that you are going through this too. Is you and your wife still in the same house? I hope you don't have to suffer the indignity of having her live next door. It is bad enough knowing that the OP is next door, but when they live together...it is unbearable. Please let me know how you are doing. I agree with Jo that we should keep in contact since we have similar situations. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help. <p>DidDallas...I think I will go out for a walk with the dog!! LOL<p>Dawn...Thanks for the suppport! It was a terrible night, but thanks to my daughter...it is a better night tonight! <p>Momrat...I found out this morning that she had sent the email to him. I am so glad she did!! She was upset when I talked to her this afternoon because she thinks he is angry with her. I guess the response he sent her was not what she expected...he had comments about everything she had written to him and to her it sounded like he was angry. I honestly couldn't tell if he was or not. When he came over tonight he sounded OK. Was pleasant and we actually talked about fixing things up to help sell it faster!! What a change! <p>thanks for all of the heartfelt replies. it means alot to know there are so many caring people here.
BH

bh,
YAY! YAY! YAY!<p>Now you can take the dog for that walk!!!! I'm so happy for you.<p>Kiss that little daughter! She must actually have gotten thru to the Grinch's three sizes too small heart.<p>The salmon--hey! What about stuffing it up the dryer vent in the OW house??? That will be peee-yeww! And don't forget limburger cheesein the flowers by the front door.

Road-kill skunk in the furnace vent??? [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]
Take care of yourself. Sounds like you have some pretty good support in your daughter.

Brilliant! But the road kill skunk really must go under the hood of the van...heat does such wonderful things to 'fragant' items.