On Saturday the counselor had both my wife (WS) and myself in to talk with her. The counselor basically asked my wife where she was at with the in house separation we have been doing for the past five weeks. My wife said for the most part she still feels the same way and that she wants a divorce. Everything that my wife said is telling me she wants a divorce. She has wanted her freedom, her independence to do whatever whenever, she wants to date other people, etc. She has felt this way for about the past eight months. I caught her five months ago being involved with a co-workers. That ended with him in December. I am not sure how far it went physical because my wife won't tell me. Personally I think it went pretty far because she says we only kissed. Personally I don't believe that at all.
I have planned A my butt off and my wife does acknowledge changes within me. The problem is my wife said she just doesn’t feel it inside of her to make the marriage work. She stated awhile back she isn’t attracted to me any more and she doesn’t feel the “in love” part any more. So I am at the fork in the road and which way do I go? Do I just accept the divorce is coming and realize there is nothing I can do about it? Do I fight more? Do I raise the white flag? Do I move on?
One odd thing was last night when I came home from the gym my wife was screaming on the phone with her mom. Her family does not support her at all in anything she is doing. Also her parents know about the other guy. My wife hung up the phone on her mom and my wife just flipped out. She starts throwing things and just started screaming. She just broke down. I let her do this for a good twenty or so minutes and then I told her let’s go for a drive and I won’t say a word. In the process of her just screaming on the bed she said out loud “I just don’t know what I am doing.” I have heard this two other times come out of my wife’s mouth. This is scary to me because it seems she just doesn’t understand what she is doing deep down inside of her. I think at this point my wife is too proud to say that she needs help. I did get her out of the house before she broke something in the house or broke something on herself. We went for about a two-hour drive and I only said about 12 words whenever she asked me something. At the end of the night she said thanks for getting me out of the house.
So I am here asking for some advice on which direction I should take? I still care and love my wife but I am just worn out. I want to work on the relationship and she doesn’t. I have to prepare myself when we sit down with the counselor in four weeks and I hear what my wife’s final decision is. From all that I have heard it is going to be a divorce. This is something I really don’t want.
Help….

Hi, You will like tough love, I think this is a great book. Do not try to hold her... open the cage door and let her go...if she is yours she will come back toyou. From her actions, I think she is... just take the pressure off, like the book says.... <p>Honey