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Just did the monthly cash transfer.

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Originally Posted by Gerkaguards
Just did the monthly cash transfer.

Is there a pool to guess how fast she spends it. I bet it is gone from the joint account by COB tomorrow. She'll probably also send back some snarky comment about how she told you she was going to spend your money if you put it in the joint account, but she's still divorcing you.


Jim

BS - 32 (me)
FWW - 33
Married 8/31/03
No kids (but 3 cats)
D-Days - 8/25/06 (EA), 11/3/06 (PA)
NC agreed to - 11/8/06
NC broken - 11/28/06, 12/16/06, 1/18/07, 1/26/07, 1/27/07
Status - In Recovery
Jim's Story
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Already gone.

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A little under 3-hours.


Testosterone boys! Testosterone! It ain’t just for nose, ear and back hair anymore!
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I didn't actually tell WW that the extra $500 was for her family, I wonder if she'll figure that out.

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Originally Posted by Gerkaguards
I didn't actually tell WW that the extra $500 was for her family, I wonder if she'll figure that out.

Family, what's that? Me, me, me!

I would include that on your next conversational email to her. When are you sending that? It's obvious she has access to a computer now.


Jim

BS - 32 (me)
FWW - 33
Married 8/31/03
No kids (but 3 cats)
D-Days - 8/25/06 (EA), 11/3/06 (PA)
NC agreed to - 11/8/06
NC broken - 11/28/06, 12/16/06, 1/18/07, 1/26/07, 1/27/07
Status - In Recovery
Jim's Story
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Probably tomorrow morning. I managed to read most of SAA while I was stuck at a repair base on Thursday. Lots of parallels between Jon and Sue and our situation.

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Afternoon Gurka!

Well, I'm back in the states after a 12 hr flight... waiting on my connecting flight to TX...

Hope you are doing well and stayng safe! I'll be checking in regularly so let me know if there's anything I can help you with, OK?

Semper Fi,

RIF

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I sure do miss Texas RIF. smile

Everything's great today. Started some new vitamins that are awesome. Feel like I could take on the world.

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Hello Gerka!
Great timing for checking in, I've been thinking about you.

Originally Posted by Gerkaguards
Started some new vitamins that are awesome. Feel like I could take on the world.
That's great, this whole mess takes quite a bit of stamina, so everything that we can do to make ourselves stronger in that respect is important.

About you coming home, you seemed to be unsure about that.
You will need to come home and face WW. This sort of Plan A cannot be sustained for a long time. WW needs to see you, see your presence and conviction to repair your M.

This money that is intended for her family, I think that you should let MIL know in a subtle way that you have made this gesture through WW.
Who knows what WW is doing with this cash.

eg. ' MIL, your family is still in my prayers. Cancer is not only devastating to a family emotionally, but also financially.
Please accept the extra cash that I sent to WW for you and don't worry about it,
I want to help out any way that I can. How is FIL doing with the treatment?'

Or something like that. Has his illness even been confirmed yet?
If his illness is not as severe as what WW makes it out to be, her family should know how she is manipulating you.
WS's need to be accountable to everyone that they are lying to.



M'd 22 years
BW-me
D-Day 08/08 LTA


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I let her MIL know that I sent her money for the family.

If I go back to the states, I can't force her to see me. She lives several states away. She can however force me to get a divorce.

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okay, good that you let MIL know about the $$$.
What about FIL illness, does he have cancer and is it as severe as WW says it is?

How can she force you to D if you don't sign?
Staying where you are indefinitely is not rebuilding your M, it's a going nowhere plan.
If you are not physically in the picture, a reminder that you are her H, she may very well seek other OM.


M'd 22 years
BW-me
D-Day 08/08 LTA


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Have me served with papers. I can push things off for 5 or 6 months after being served, but not indefinitely.

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Well, then you have 5 or 6 months to try to rebuild, Plan A in person.

Off to the market, have a good day Gerka!


M'd 22 years
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D-Day 08/08 LTA


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That's just it, we'll still in at seperate posts, and as far as I know she doesn't want to see me, and has threatened to call the police if I try to come see her.

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She has no RO police can't do nothing.

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I also don't have her address. Without her inviting me\cooperating I just don't see how it would work. No one to pick me up from the airport, no place to stay, etc.

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Originally Posted by Gerkaguards
I also don't have her address. Without her inviting me\cooperating I just don't see how it would work. No one to pick me up from the airport, no place to stay, etc.

Address, phone number = Intellius, PI

Pick up from airport = rental car

Place to stay = hotel

It may have been good to stay away from her for a month or two after exposure, but any longer than that and you will make it easier for her to withdraw from you fully. You need to get her from conflict to withdrawal.

So what if she can serve you when you get back? What's your plan, wait a year or two until she gives up? She'll already have a serious boyfriend by then (if she doesn't already). Even if she didn't, you will have withdrawn enough to the point where you wouldn't even want to try anymore. You would just be postponing the inevitable. You need to engage her again. Go home and see her. In the meantime, attempt to call her more, especially on her new number. Find out what it is, and give her a call. If she doesn't want to answer your call, there is an app where you can type in someone else's number and it will appear to her that other person is calling. I know it is available on the Iphone, but you can probably get one on yours as well. Right now your WW is in withdrawal, and you NEED to get her back to conflict if you stand a chance. And when you get her back to conflict, you need to avoid LBs unlike two weeks ago when you went back and forth with lovebusting emails.


Jim

BS - 32 (me)
FWW - 33
Married 8/31/03
No kids (but 3 cats)
D-Days - 8/25/06 (EA), 11/3/06 (PA)
NC agreed to - 11/8/06
NC broken - 11/28/06, 12/16/06, 1/18/07, 1/26/07, 1/27/07
Status - In Recovery
Jim's Story
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Intellius doesn't even show her first address in AZ, or the phone number she's had for 2 years. We've moved around so much that it just doesn't seem to track us well.

I could wait another year by being here, and if she hasn't changed her mind by then I could PCS to Korea, buying myself another 3 years of being insulated from legal proceedings.

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Originally Posted by Gerkaguards
I could wait another year by being here, and if she hasn't changed her mind by then I could PCS to Korea, buying myself another 3 years of being insulated from legal proceedings.

This will not work.

You cannot recover your M by avoiding her. You will have to get on base, and look for her.


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