So sorry this happened to you, Dutch.

You wife may very well be sincere that she wasn't seeking to have an affair.

But her interactions with this man felt good to her in various ways and were filling a void. She continued to go back for a little more and a little more of the fix, likely not intending for it to progress to the point it did. Being physical with this man quite probably crossed her mind before it happened, yet she probably told herself that she wouldn't allow it to escalate to anything physical.

Just like she's telling you now that she won't allow it to continue.

Part of her knows she shouldn't allow it to continue. Part of her doesn't want it to continue. And she is likely very sincere. But a fix is a fix.

What you have to remember is that she doesn't have the necessary boundaries, the necessary tools in place yet to successfully end this affair the way it needs to be ended.

Get your tush down there now!

How will you feel if part of her succumbs to another fix to fill the void she still has?

Your wife did a good by sharing the truth with you. It is her cry for help. It sounds like she very much wants to do the right thing. But she doesn't yet have the necessary tools, and she is on her own.

She may be willing to call the MB Coaching Center herself first thing Monday morning, but if she doesn't, you most certainly should:
http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi7020_sched.html


FBW in recovery