Originally Posted By: Hilltopper1972

Speaking of withdrawal, that is where we were for a long time with occasional bouts of conflict. At least we are in a state of conflict and hopefully heading back towards intimacy. She has shut me out again entirely and it feels bad. I'm very lonely and sad tonight.



It will take her time to get over your comment yesterday. At least she's sharing a house with you, I think that's pretty generous given the circumstances. wink Give her some time, peace, and meet her needs as best you can until she's ready to move on. Quit pushing her so hard.

MB doesn't work over night. It's not a majikal cureall for all marriage ailments. It takes time, work on yourselves, commitment, and changing some normally entrenched beliefs. Give it time, be patient. Someone told me to form a plan, give it a set amount of time, and reevaluate at the end of that time. It worked out pretty well for us. We still struggle, but a lot of that is situational and not the fault of the program because we're not using it 100% (DH still travels 5 days a week).

I believe that stewing and then blowing up is really hard for both parties to get over. My DH has always been really, really bad about it and since we've been using MB and the trust and intimacy has grown he's feeling safe enough to share with me before we get to the stewing/blowing point. It's really changed the dynamic of our relationship.

Last edited by HopefulNC; 04/20/11 11:07 PM.

Me: 30
Him: 39
Together 5 years
Married the very best man in the world 04/06/2013 after being common law for too long. I'm a lucky woman.
7 Cats - Viscount Ashley of Leftfield, Pawkie Petunia, The Timinator, Leo the Lionheart, Fruit Snack, Cloud, and Barret
And our very lucky pony, Starbucks