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I posted this on his thread also. It's a radio clipnof Dr. H says a WH needs to do if his serious about recovery. Radio clip on WH serious about recovery
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Thanks BH! Now, where did my headphones go.....
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Now my WH feels that his privacy was invaded and refuses to post anymore. He still doesn't get it! He's as wayward as ever..... THERE IS NO PRIVACY NECESSARY WHEN HE IS WILLING TO BE 100% HONEST! The only privacy he needs is when he is using the bathroom. 
Recovery began 10/07;
Meeting my wife's EN's is my "thank you" that refuses to be silenced.
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Thanks BH! Now, where did my headphones go..... It's a good clip. The WH should go tell eveyone that he had an affair, he should "expose" himself (not the illegal way :D). Like HerPapaBear said he has no privacy right now.
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Why does he feel his privacy was invaded?
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RQ,
What's up? Are you going to go Plan B? Call the coaching center?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Thanks, I only wrote on his post because he had told me earlier that he was confused by the abbreviations.
Unfortunately, I don't believe he will be posting here any longer. My family is VERY upset about what he posted about them and upset with me for "allowing" it, I guess.
I'm quite upset because I thought this was a great resource for us. I am not happy about what he wrote about my family at all and does not pertain to OUR problems. Did he lie about your family? Do you agree that your first priority is your marriage?
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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BH- I am encouraging him to call the coaching center. We have been discussing signing up for the online program. He says that he will continue posting here. That he doesn't care what my mother says, that this is between me and him and he'll do whatever he has to do.
MB - His observations were inaccurate. But my mother can get too involved in things and takes things very personally. She has actually boycotted B&N for life because they fired my DS21! I do know that recovering my marriage is my priority right now and that any amends to will have to happen down the road.
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Yes definitely call the coaching center.
What did you tell your mom? Good opportunity to stand up for your M.
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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BrainHurts, I'd rather not say too much but I did tell her that we are working recovery and that I should not be judged by wanting to do that. And that our issues have nothing to do with her.
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BrainHurts, I'd rather not say too much but I did tell her that we are working recovery and that I should not be judged by wanting to do that. And that our issues have nothing to do with her. Rocketqueen. There are so many parents and ILs that are weak enablers. You mother seems to have some fire. It would be great to be able to channel that into productive support. Buy her the book SAA so that she can educate herself and become a positive influence in your M and in your fight to hold your kids family together. Of course your marriage comes before anything else...but I always try to give people the best chance. That is what I would try if it were my own mother.
Last edited by pokerface; 04/26/12 10:06 AM.
ME: BW
HIM: FWH
Married 18 yrs
DDay 09/2008 and 12/2008
Recovered
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pokerface, don't get me wrong. My mother is a wonderful person and I don't believe she is an enabler. She wants to help anyone who is hurt. But she gets too empathic with the issues, and takes on the role and the pain of the person she is trying to help. She is also very emphatic about her thoughts and her opinions.
I am just concerned for her and feel responsible for her pain. That is a great idea about giving her the SAA book. I just read it and another one is coming in the mail from Joyce Harley so I will give her my copy. Thank you for the suggestion!
Last edited by Rocketqueen; 04/26/12 10:34 AM. Reason: corrected spelling
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pokerface, don't get me wrong. My mother is a wonderful person and I don't believe she is an enabler. She wants to help anyone who is hurt. But she gets too empathic with the issues, and takes on the role and the pain of the person she is trying to help. She is also very emphatic about her thoughts and her opinions. RQ. Sorry maybe I didn't word that properly...clearly your Mother is not an enabler and I respect her need to protect you. I learned through my own road to recovery that there are many popular misguided views about affairs. Many times the people trying to "help" are following those naive views not realizing that they are causing more harm than good. The better your mother understands marriage builders principles; the better the chance that she will be able to give positive support. You don't need any additional conflict right now. Present the SAA book to her in a positive way. I am wishing the best for you and your family.
ME: BW
HIM: FWH
Married 18 yrs
DDay 09/2008 and 12/2008
Recovered
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FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Posts: 3,066
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Mom- read the links. I'll give you the book tonight.
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Mom- read the links. I'll give you the book tonight. Does kiss have the book SAA? I think he needs it before your mom?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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He doesn't like to read. He has trouble retaining what he read. That is why I was looking at ordering audiobooks for him. My mother, on the other hand, enjoys reading as much as I do 
Last edited by Rocketqueen; 04/27/12 03:53 PM.
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He doesn't like to read. He has trouble retaining what he read. That is why I was looking at ordering audiobooks for him. My mother, on the other hand, enjoys reading as much as I do Ok gotcha. It would be better if HE would buy it.
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Posts: 20,476 Likes: 5
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I've found "HNHN" on audio but not SAA.
Did you find it on audio?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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He doesn't like to read. He has trouble retaining what he read. That is why I was looking at ordering audiobooks for him. Radio show archives, listen online! http://www.marriagebuilders.com/radio_program/
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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