UVA,

I think you are missing what FH is saying. Let me see if I can clarify here a little.

Can "wisdom" be in an unbeliever? Sure. I dont need to ask only believers for directions when I am on a trip. The guy at the service station may be an atheist, but knows how to tell me where the mall is. I also can take a college class from a Hindu who is teaching me Modern Political Theory. Can he impart to me the information I need to learn? Of course.

What those two guys cannot teach me, tell me, advise me...is the will of God. How can they...they do not know Him. They do not speak to Him...they do not follow Him.

So, when the Bible advises that Christians seek counsel only from believers, it doesnt mean we ignore the rest of the world. But what it does mean that when we want and need God's decision on something, we are to NEVER ask unbelievers what that will is.

Wisdom, worldly wisdom...can be known by anyone. That is not what FH is talking about. But Godly wisdom can only be know by those that follow Him, that know Him, that speak with Him. And it is not arrogance to say that. I mean, how in the world would I say that I know what President Bush wants to do today when I dont know him, dont speak with him, and have never met him? The same goes with unbelievers. They dont know God, thus they cannot speak for Him.

WNH asked on this thread for God's will in divorce. Thus, he should not want the counsel of those that do not know God.

Hope that helps.

In His arms.

A Christian is mainly known by thier actions, not thier words. Your wife's actions are heinous. She is not acting like a Christian right now.

So, therefore, you are unequally yolked to her. Since you are trying to act as a Christian and yet she is acting like a heinous pagan.

I still say she has already left your marriage in her heart so you can do what you want nothing will change her. Yet she has become a better actress, learning how to ACT subnissive, remorseful and sorry so as to put you off the track. And to lie to you about the truth.

The truth is her heart and her actions are far from you and the marriage even though her words appear to be remorseful.

MM - thanks. You explained it much better than my feeble attempts.

StellaKat - Not "acting like a Christian" is not, in itself, proof that someone is an unbeliever and that their marriage is an "unevenly yoked" marriage in the sense of a believer who is married to an unbeliever. It MAY be that way, which is partly why I am interested in learing more about both weneedhelp's current level of faith (which so far sounds very "new" and "young in the faith) and his wife's ( about which we know very little yet ).

SIN will make ALL believers appear in a "less than godly light." But ALL men/women are sinners and battle the fallen flesh and fallen world their whole lives, no different than Paul battled his.

God bless.

I suppose my WW would think she is the believer and me the unbeliever. That's the way she is used to thinking of us. But my heart and mind have changed recently, as you see above. I've tried to explain to WW the changes in me; she says I may have renewed faith, but she would not call me reborn or a fundamentalist.

WW says I can't be born again unless I literally believe 100% of what's in the bible. (Wouldn't that be more like a definition of a 'fundamentalist' view rather than being 'reborn' in the faith?) Anyway although I believe the bible is divinely inspired and shows us the way to live our lives, I don't take 100% of it as the literal truth. So according to WW's definitions I am not born again. I guess she's entitled to her definitions. In that case I'm not sure what to call myself.

Could be that my WW does take 100% of the bible as the literal truth. But I'm not sure; she frequently has debates with her sister, whom I would call a fundamentalist. So wherever you place WW's religion, you can at least know that she is outflanked by some fundamentalists.

Both WW and I believe, and try to live as Christians; but as you see we have our failures.

Sorry to be verbose; that may or may not help. Eager to hear your further thoughts.

<edited to add: I don't intend any negative implication when using the word 'fundamentalist'; intended just as a shorthand way of saying one who believes 100% of the bible as the literal truth.>

FH and MM,

I see your point but I disagree on the notion that only Christians can know the Will of God or have access to Wisdom in the relevant sense being discussed here. However, since this is not a philosophical thread (I was a philosopher in a past life), I will not to pursue this any longer.

Notwithstanding my claim above, I believe you two are very wise and WNH would be well served to heed your advice.

God Bless

Today I just found evidence of renewed A#1. I'll write about it on my other thread.

weneedhelp - There seems to be some rather large misunderstanding (or deliberate twisting) of the truths.

1. born-again is what happens when someone acknowledges that they are a sinner, confesses their sins to God, acknowledges that Jesus IS the Messiah and accepts Him as their personal Lord and Savior, surrendering their lives to Him. The Holy Spirit then INDWELLS (takes up permanent residence in) the new "babe in Christ" and begins the lifelong process of Sanctification.

2. Believing "100%" in the Scriptures as the revealed and inspired Word of God is what Christians do based upon what the Scriptures say about themselves and on the testimony of Jesus and the inspired writers. "All Scripture is given by inspiration of God...."

3. Believing the Scriptures are true does NOT mean that people can twist that to mean that you believe things are "literal" that are clearly figurative. The Scripture uses all forms of writing. Thus, we DO NOT believe that God has "wings," or similar such things that scoffers like to imply.

But let's "cut to the chase" right now. REGARDLESS of whether your wife likes to argue "fundamentalism" versus "liberalism," the TRUTH remains that ADULTERY and marital unfaithfulness are FORBIDDEN by God. There is NO justification or excuse for the willful disobedience to God's commands.

IF your wife is engaged in adultery, or any marital unfaithfulness, she needs to repent of her sin and turn back to OBEDIENCE of God's commands. Make NO mistake about it, if she will not, she is fooling herself and in grave danger....God has clearly stated that NO active and willful adulterers will be in heaven. THAT alone should cause one who thinks of themself as a Christian to pause and examine their own belief. "Choose ye THIS day whom ye shall serve, but as for ME and my house, we will serve the LORD."

Weneedhelp, you ARE, by God's command, the spiritual leader in your house....so lead her gently but unwaiveringly in obedience to God's commands.

God bless.

Mine has had 2 affairs also. The Psychologist says it is very dangerous ground now because they get easier and easier for them. And as I read above, he said it is a character flaw or as he called it, a fatal flaw. To overcome this, they have to truly want to change themselves. But it has been his experience that they will not until life comes crashing down around them. He said it might be 2-3 more bad relationships before she realizes that she is the common denominator. And then MAYBE she may want to change.

Picked up a random book (Judith Meyer I think) that said 'The Battle Belongs to God'. I guess it means I am to stand fast, but let God tell me what to do. Not my will but His. It's difficult though to know His will.

I relate a lot to you and your questions about God. What to do, what He wants. My MIL and family and church are praying for a restored marrige while my Wh is staying with ow and living up the single life. I am here with 2 kids and trying to make the best life I can. We have signed legal sep papers for my and the kids protection.

I am not giving up completely yet, and nothing is too hard for GOd but holy cow, I feel like I have been through the infidelity ringer these past 2 years with an h who just seems to me to have completely whacked out!

mlhb

I really feel for you mlhb. Those two years must have been an extremely stressful time. I can't pretend to know God's will, but I have faith that however it works out will be driven by Him. I'm sure you also will keep your faith in that.