Good idea <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

John Doe
1234 Main St
Anywhere, USA 12345

Rinder,

I'll check your thread shortly. My boy is awsome. He is finally old enough to watch the childrens programs and asnswer questions when they ask (like Mickey Mouse Club House) It's frikin hilarious. He sings and dances and talks to the TV.

Hey Maybe,

My mother's from there.

Do you know.....

never mind

Thanks for the ideas..

yeah, I'm enjoing L, for the most part...sometimes I want to kill him for the things that come out of his mouth...F was the same way at four...

But I love both of them so much...it's been really easy having them with me...

Well, thanks again!

Have you ever been to Duck and Cover? You hunt right?

Just curious...some friends of mine own that store...

That's in broussard? I think I went in there once looking for last minute deer corn. I think they were closed or they didn't sell it.

But I'm not a big hunter. I deer hunt, but mostly go to drink beer, smoke cigars, sit by the fire, cook, etc...

Theres other things involved in Deer Hunting????

Somebody should have told me <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

Domaru,

Some weekends I don't even bring my gun.

Hey!!..Guess What!!..I AM NOT CRAZY!!

I got a phone call tonight from one of WW's best friends. She was just calling to check on me. She and another girl served in our wedding and have stayed in touch with us through the years. WW used to call them regularly and kept them up to date with our lives. Well guess who stopped communicating with her best friends. The one that called had a baby last week and still hasn't heard from WW. I got a call from her husband a few hours after the birth and I immediatley notified WW so she has known the whole time. WW has spoken to the other girl once, and she couldn't believe who she was talking too. They are both in shock at WW's behavior and want me to know I have thier support.

Like many WS's it looks like mine is starting to lose some of her oldest and dearest friends. They have been around since day 1, literaly they were there the night we met, and they know what kind of H and Father I have been. So they are balking at WW's excuses for her actions.

It just feels good to know that people on her side know better.

Actually both of her friends have recently had babies and are healthy and happy. I know it hurts them to know that they are building families and WW is destroying one. They should be enjoying this time together.

You think WW knows this too and that's why she is avoiding them? HMMM

Later

Yes, that's what mine and all of them do. That is why you expose. Eventually the pressure becomes too great and the affair finally dies. You are on the right path, BC.

The waywards will RUN from everyone that they know doesn't support their fantasy relationship. They will gravitate to those who do. In other words pigs like to play in the mud with pigs. They will search out others who are "worse" than they are so that they feel better about what they are doing and who they have become. They will use these idiots as support to justify their affair. They will lie to them about you and your M in search of false sympathy and consent for what they are doing. The problem is that in the end they have traded a loving spouse for a lying, cheating, POS OP, traded good, solid friends who care for pigs in friend's clothing who when the time gets tough they will get going.

Thanks Jim and HP,

I agree. WW is runnig with a pack of wild dogs right now. It seems to be worse with school teachers. They hang around kids all day and after awhile they start acting like them. They have cliques and they look foward to the weekend for partying.

Because of her environment I have to deal with the fact that this could be permanent or at least last longer than I'm willing to wait.

Life in Limbo Land continues. Is it June yet?

I had brief contact with WW last night and she told me her and DS were heading over to her frriend's house, except it wasn't one of her new friends. It was the friend we have that is trying to help save our M. I don't think she'd lie about it since she knows I stay in touch with this friend. I know she may be only doing this because all the rest of her new friends are out partying, but the more time she spends with this friend the better chance we have. This is the friend that told me to call IC about suicide threats that ended up getting her medicated and then this friend told WW it was her that pressured me into doing it and F her other friends that were mad at me for it.

Also, they left to go to this friends house late, so I get the fealing WW is having a tougher time with our seperation than she leads on because this is the friend she turns to the most when she is having trouble with herself. What I am getting at is this wasn't a planned visit being how late they left to drive to friends house which is probably 45 mins away with a 3 year old in tow. It was his bed time when they left.

Another thing that happened recently that could be a clue. The other day me and DS were eating supper and DS asked me again if I loved mommy. I told him yes like I all ways do and he followed up with something about us taking a picture, like he wants a family photo or something. Then out of the blue he says, "Somebody's playing games daddy".
I have never said anything like that and they don't talk that way at daycare, so where did he hear that? He said it 2 or 3 times. It makes me wonder if my Plan A is starting to get WW's head spinning. Maybe it's working and she can't figure out why. Ive told her in the past that over time she may start to feel differently about me and she said that wasn't possible at the time. Is that starting to change a month into withdrawal.

Also,
In the past she spent all of her time when she had DS on the phone with OM. Last Sun she spent the entire day at home and didn't leave until dark. Now she is spending the entire evening at a pro-M friends house. She answers her phone more often when I call (I call every 2 or 3 days just for contact and hopefully love deposits) and her cold days aren't as cold.

Does anybody else see this pattern? It feels like she is making progress and my gut tells me OM is out of the picture. A month later it still feels like OM was begging me to ask him to stop contact. I don't think he wanted the complication, he's a player and he likes it easy. Maybe his conscience got to him because he's never had a BS stand up for the M before.

I don't know. To be honest I'm desperately searching for progress because time is taking its toll on my feelings for WW. I wanted to Plan A till June, but if my Love Bank goes into the red I'll have to go Plan B much sooner just to save what I have left.

Any thoughts or 2x4's are welcome. No Regrets, Remember.

B Cajun, Sorry to hear that this is so new for you. i can relate. I was married 10 1/2 year and was married at 19 with my WS. He said the same thing, however he wanted me to kick him out. I said you know what I love you and know that you made some bad decisons, but I am willing for you to stay because I love you. I didn't give him the option to move, but he didn't realize this. he was so confused about what happen he needed some direction in where to go. Seeing as I am the only friend that he had, this was easy. Plus he wanted to stay. Anyways, I believe what everyone else is telling you, you are making it easy for her to get what she wants. Letting her leave, helps her to avoid the problem at hand. How does she feel about your son growing up in a split family??? How does she feel about not solving her problems now will only create the same problems in a second relationship??? 6 months is usually the time they give for a WS to realize they need you back. what is you next step??

cfc,

I think you may have replied to a much earlier post. You're talking about stuff that happened a month ago. WW left against my will. I didn't help her at all. She took her bills with her and moved herself. About the only thing she took from the house that mattered was the sofa. Also, that all happened right about the time I discovered MB. If had found this sooner, I may have been abled to get her to stay.

Anyway. It appears that WW had another breakdown this weekend. WW had DS this weekend and spent the entire weekend at mutual friend of ours house. She is actually trying to help the M so WW wouldn't have went there if she was up to no good. Something's going on and hopefully WW will talk to me about it when she drops off DS this afternoon. I talked to her earlier to arrainge DS exchange and she sounded bad. I asked her if she was alright and she said no. That's when she told me they spent the weekend at the friends house. I asked if it was something we needed to talk about and I got a yeah,maybe. I don't know if this is good or bad, but it is obvious that her happy single life isn't so happy after all.

I'll update after DS exchange.

BC,

I hope with her spending the weekend with a firend who is pro marriage really does mean something.

I'm anxious to hear about it... It would really be great to hear some good news.

Still

BC,

Hoping that something good comes from this - it's definitely a plus to have a pro M person talking to WW, especially by WW's own choosing.

I wish my WW would do the same. She only talks to her mom (who is divorced, her parents separated about the time we started dating and she was already seeing another man before they got their D) and her brother.

OM MY GOD!!!

I don't know where to start. Didn't see this one coming.

It turns out WW was still with OM. I kind of figured this, but was hoping progress was being made. Actually it was being made despite R with OM.

So here's what happened.

OM dumped her Fri. His brother died 2 weeks ago and he is now having issues with mortality and can't live with what he is doing. He now wants to get his life together and I guess get right with God.

So Fri WW had a complete melt down. Her friend had to go get her because she was just completely gone. She spent the weekend being consoled and counseled by friend. Friend convinced her to come clean with me about everything.

And she did. She told me the complete dynamic of thier R. She had been introduced to his family and was basically in it. She was at B's funeral with the family.

She also told me how the R unraveled pretty much on its own and it was eating her alive and she started realizing how controling he was being. When they were out OM would get mad if she talked to any men other than him. You think that's because he didn't trust the cheater in her?

She wasn't comfortable in public with him, they basically hung out at each other's houses and did nothing.

It was great to listen to her bad mouth him. I did have one LB though. When she was telling me about the control he put on her I said, "and you thought I was controlling?" She didn't care for that much.

She even talked about giving up everything for him and now she was getting dumped.

I just listened.

She said now she knows how I must have felt and she was sorry for the way she's treated me through all this.

There was alot more said, but you get the drift.

So now she is ready for me to know where she lives and wants me to have a key to her apartment and car incase of emergency. She never gave any keys to OM.

She asked about withdrawal and we talked about it a little bit and I told her she neede absolutely NC with OM. I told her if she says hi to him the process starts over and the pain is prolonged. She says she doesn't think it will be a problem. They teach in different sections of the school and have been having to go completely out of the way to see each other.

She also talked about DS telling her that Daddy loves her daily and how DS has been consoling her lately because he notices the pain she is in. DS is barely 3. He's a bigger man than OM. I couldn't be more proud of him.

She also talked about going back to school to change professions. She's thinking about nursing. Great, rich doctors everywhere..LOL


Oh Yeah...She also says she wants to feel the pain this time so she can own it. She doesn't want to run from her problems anymore.

Then when she left she said I didn't have to check up on her every couple a days like I have been, but if I wanted to it was OK.

Then she left, looking at me as she was leaving and waved to me.

So that's about it. Not a complete 180, but I'd give it a 90. There was still plenty of fog babble mixed in.

On my part. I was giving up fast. At church today I prayed for guidance, all through mass I talked to God, never heard a word said by the priest. I was at a breaking point. Then this happened. Now I have some restored hope. Enough hopefully to get me through her withdrawal.

MYSTERIOUS LORD I AM AT YOUR MERCY!!

Man, what a day!

God is good!!

Hoping the best for you and your family! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Good news BC,

"She also talked about going back to school to change professions. She's thinking about nursing. Great, rich doctors everywhere..LOL"

Yeah - that is what happened with my wife. Watch it!!. LOL

Anyway - keep meeting any and all EN she will let you.