That is fairly typical. He his number one priority is HIMSELF.

Fix some snacks and try to enjoy the games. I HATE football but always look back to all the good food and family togetherness that went along with football.

I understand that you're on plan A, but don't you think you need to stand up for yourself, if not, at least for your kids just a little bit? Can't you communicate the above message to him in a non-angry manner...a manner that would reveal the dissapointment in your kids and at the same time the dissapointment and hurt he caused you?

BA

Soon,

You alright? It amazes me how they can say things like that and not show it. We were watching our neighbors DS for a while this afternoon, and when she picked him up she was telling us how he's a F of convenience. He comes a sees his son or takes him when it's convenient for him. Of course she talks about this in front of WW in a way to tell her "look at the kind of father your kids have you stupid B#%#@, and you're leaving him"

Remember that as long as he's in the fog it's going to be all about him. It's sick, but that what it is.

How is your DS doing, this has to be hurting him if they use to do this together.

And yes, vent away! Best to do it here than in front of him.

Take care of yourself.

Don't know if you remember I talked about WH's BF who's wife gave him the boot just after Christmas, and WH helped him move and I'd hoped WH would feel something of my pain through his friends, well guess it didn't work. But I spent time with the friend yesterday and it was nice to talk to him about what we are going through with our spouses. He's more angry than anything now.

Anyway... nother long day. No school today, roads were bad, way too much snow. Friend plowed us out because WH was not around.

He's coming over to cook tomorrow evening. It's the only time the kids are really near him, other times he comes around and they head to their rooms ;-) His own fault.

I had a very nice weekend. And I'm questioning like Not2Fun-whether I want him back now or not... that darn roller coaster ;-)

OH TMTS he did mention football next weekend with son, they'll do their typical hotwings and potato skins. So that's good for son.

(((Serenity)))

Missed you this weekend. Doesn't this just suck??? I mean I am not depressed at all by these thoughts, I actually feel a little liberated. Well, maybe this just means we are closer to getting to Plan B. Of course, like I said, I am afraid (yes that darn fear again) that once I do that, and he does come around, it may be too late....oh well, like my DD14 counselor said "Don't borrow worry".....

not2fun

my IC said that too! That and she said something about living in today and not tomorrow! Those were probably the only two worthwhile things I got from her. she thinks I speak "psycho-babble" and so she talks over me! I am educated... just not with a masters degree like her.


UGH... a CC came in the mail for WH today! I'd like to destroy it! Wonder what he's got planned for it. He said he never wanted to get another one and then there he goes, applying for yet another one! aaahahahahah

Serenity,

I applied for a CC today. I don't have any that are in my own name. Besically, I got it for emergencies and for snooping purposes. Need money to snoop, don;t want WS to know...hehehe...not putting that in my thread in case he lurks in here. I don;t think he does though because he would blow up if he did.

Sounds like you have a smart IC...

Think before you spend... if you decide you don't want him back, don't spend the money on him. At this point I know just where my WH is yuck!!!!

Good morning sweeties,

I'm glad I went to bed early last night because by the sounds of you two being a man around here would not have been good. LOL

Ok all kidding aside, I think the three of us are suffering from the same ailment...impatience. We want something to happen but it isn't and it's driving us crazy. Hence the questions about WHY. The first time I called Jennifer, this s the first thing she had me write down, WHY I am doing this. When ever I get these thoughts a read the list again. Yes one day I will read the list and say that these reasons no longer apply, but that's down the road.

Soon - In terms of if the friends move affected him or not, read the post RIM made to me yesterday regarding WS's poker face. It might help.

Not - I'm glad he hasn't completely forgotten he has children.

That one really gets me going...this idea that children adjust easily to this. I proof that this is not the case and it just really riles me up.

Oui Allo! Bonjour! Ca va bien?

I agree with you TMTS...I definately am suffering from impatience....

and don't worry Serenity, only spending when needed...besides, I am NOT the spender in this family...there's a Porsche in the garage that proves it....

Not2fun

Hey all. Guess what I got this evening? A kiss on the forehead!!! That was the first since I don't know when... I'm thinking it was for the attention he hasn't been getting. His mom at one point had even suggested I ignore him and see if he comes around. Well ignoring really isn't a plan A thing. So anyway, he came over to cook dinner tonight. A wasn't in the friendliest of moods, so didn't look directly at him, but was very cordial. After dinner DD14 started wrestling around with me. She thinks because she is now and inch taller and out weighs me by about 15lbs that she can "beat me up" HA I showed her. We had fun. WH got the camera and started taking pics. We then downloaded them on the computer and he said you two look more like sisters ;-) I went about evening things and he prepared to leave, he came to me, gave me a hug AND a kiss on the forehead, it was nice ;-) I have not been pursuing, calling, emailing... just being "still!" May be making a difference, may not, time may tell.

TMTS... heading over to read the post regarding poker face right now. Don't worry there would not have been any male bashing had you been around last night

n2f gave him the CC this evening asked what he was going to use it for, he said "I don't plan on using it right now"... bad me I said "you didn't plan on living with someone either." Shame on me. I didn't say it in a mean way and from the looks of it he took it well, though he didn't respond.

This

and


Don't work well with each other... But I know that when they set themselves up that badly it's hard to resist. LOL

Shame on you! (Even though I’m ROFLMAO)

Ok enough of that. Sounds like it was a very good Plan A night. Good going!!

tmts-well, it's hard to plan A him, when I'm wondering if I want him back ;-) so I'm holding my tongue a lot, and being still... I'm sure this "phase" will pass and I'll be back to misery, wanting him to come home now... etc.

he goes back to work tomorrow night, so we'll be on the computer doing a lot of chatting (maybe, if I feel like it).

Hi Soon,

Sure, you're just showing him a little more of the stick part of plan A. I know what you mean though, I have times where I want to pack her luggage and put it on the front porch... you want freedom, well there you go honey. LOL

We'll be fine either way

yep, today/night we can say we'll be fine... but YOU just remember that when the other feeling starts creeping in. ugh, ick!

So I rubbed shoulders with the Attorney General recently! My new job (started in Dec) has me out meeting new/important people. I LOVE what I do... and it gives me stuff to talk about ;-) when he does decide to come around an engage in conversation.

Bon Matin Soon,

Ya I know what you mean, that's why I'm trying to hold on to this feeling.

How are you today? Seeing that we were both posting at 1am are you as tired as I am? Extra large coffee this morning.

LOL, actually not too tired ;-) though I didn't sleep well, which is unusual for me... oh I know why I napped early evening! Darn it I have to remember to eat during the day so I have energy to make it through a whole day!

Gotta get ready for work.

Have a good one!

Ok He was almost super dad... not quite, but he was pretty darn close. Now he sees them a couple minutes here, a couple minutes there. He's not a BAD guy so I want them to be with him!!! Obviously NOOOOOO where around her and he knows that! "they" work different schedules, so it isn't like he's spending time with her when he can be with them. I can't get a feel on whether they even care or not! I've offered to leave the house so he can spend time here, he says they just go on the computers and don't care anyway, well boo hoo!! Do something with them!!! I know kids need their dad, especially if they are so used to him being there all the time!

I felt like I should bring it up to him, but I can think of any way to approach the subject that wouldn't cause him stress=LB... I'm thinking he feels guilty and has no idea what to tell them about what he's doing so he's just avoiding them... but geesh!!! I'm MAD at him for leaving them!!

Any ideas??

he called while I was cooking, mentioned he may stop by later to talk... I wanted to bring up the fact that he's missing out on the kids... well he didn't show up, which is kind of good, because I hadn't gotten any wisdom yet ;-)

I will see him tomorrow evening though... any advice?? (to the above post)