And for good measure, throw in the fridge and the kitchen sink!

I KNOW you are ready. It will be a battle, but it is one you are prepared for (as much as anyone ever can be).

What have you done in regards to gathering up critical data? Start now. It will keep you focused and give you a purpose - that helped me get through a lot of it all. Being factually prepared. Emotionally was a different story, but we all do the best we can.

SL, you have fought a brilliant and gallant fight. You are doing what is best for you and DS. No one can ever argue any differently.

I have the utmost regard and admiration for you, my fellow Goddess!!

I don't know what to prepare at this point. I will talk to my lawyer and jump from there. The agreement I have right now suits me fine, except the house issue is not settled. The LSA states that, at the end of two years time, one of us can buy the other out, until then, DS and I can remain in the home. An ideal situation would be that I have enough money to move into my own place and start over. I just don't know if I'll be able to do that right away, even with a buyout. Without PWC helping me pay the mortgage here, we would have to sell. I could not afford it on my own.

PWC STILL has not come to get the remainder of his things. When I meet with the lawyer I'll figure out what I need to do in order to get THAT ball rolling.

There are days when I want to email and ask if I should assume he doesn't want anything from the house, since he has not picked anything up. The THINGS that he has said he wants aren't small, either, so I cannot just pack it up and send it on it's merry way. NOPE. It's furniture--large pieces.

He has left some clothes behind, which I could burn in order to save on heating expenses this winter.

Can you tell I REALLY REALLY REALLY am tired of all this. LIMBO Bullshite!

YIKES! Two years isn't very long. Too bad you can't make it until son is 18, and then split the profits.

You might be able to get a roommate to share one room. That worked for me.

Nope, two years is a drop in the bucket, B, but that is what he would agree to. Honestly, I think he is just trying to buy time for himself so that he can buy me out and live happily ever after in his house.

I truly believe PWC came home this last time to try and save the marriage so that he wouldn't lose his house. I was quaternary to him. Primary, the house, secondary, the kid, teriary the dog, quaternary, me. Oh, wait, I think I came in behind the ZTR mower. What does that make me? QUINARY?

Jokes aside, I'll speak to my lawyer and see what can be done. MD is an 'equitable' state, and we make equal dough, so I don't think there is much hope.

California is a community property state too, and many here are able to make marital agreements to keep the family home until the minor child reaches 18, and then split the equity. It just depends on what you can agree on.

Of course, statistics say that you will be remarried within 4 years, so maybe it is a moot point.

Gotta love those statisticians.

Sorry I'm late . . . I missed the towel news among the sausage discussion.

I recall that BR used to talk about betrayed spouses "earning their divorces." Lord knows you have earned yours.

I'm sorry that . . . well, you know.

You'll be better off in the long run, and DS will be fine with you as his mother.

(((SL)))

I earned the D as soon as PWC made the first cut. It really was the deepest, to coin a phrase. That first affair was the devastating thing. All else that followed was just PWC getting his message across and me fighting acceptance. Unfortunately, DS was bounced around thru all of it. I have remorse over that, and will for some time. It was good that PWC and I did not FIGHT in front of DS, or scream and yell. Underneath it all I was screaming for mercy. It's good to not feel like that so much anymore.

When I hear about how careless PWC is with DS and introductions to the fille du jour, that anger comes back. I feel so protective of DS.

Thanks for sticking with me, especially when there were times that I'm SURE you were screaming into the monitor "Throw in the towelllllllll!"

G'night Guy. Talk to y'all tomorrow. THis girl is sleepy.

DS will know that you did everything you possibly could (and then some) to save your marriage. I think that's going to count for a lot down the road. Hell, it already counts.

I never screamed at you to throw in the towel.

You're still my hero.

(((((SL))))))

Evening, Chai. Plan B'ers come out at night, in the cover of darkness. We're like Batman.

Believer said...

I have a roommate right now; my sister. I don't think I can last another 12 years with her though. One of us will have to die.

Hi SL,


Does it help if I said that I know EXACTLY what you mean and how you feel?

((((((((((((((((((SL)))))))))))))))))))))

Another Plan Ber comes out at night. She's even got the name for it.

Hi SD.

It's a Dark K-night!

...but really, it's 3 in the morning where I am, and it's unusual for me to be up...but I couldn't sleep... I will avoid looking in mirrors ALL DAY tomorrow.

Good K-night, SD!

I should be packing.

Ahh.. well I suppose I'll come with hugs instead of grossness today.

(((((SL)))))

Don't worry.. you can give me all kinds of crap and I won't drop my corner of the net.

SL just dropped by to say HI and to let you know that you are (as everyone else is saying) a wonderful woman who will be just fine in the end.

I am sure getting there will not be fun but i have every confidence that you will come out BETTER when all is said and done.

Good luck on your journey!!!

Well, here I am out at night again under the cover of darkness. Where are you SL?? I hope you aren't watching Swingtown.

Am I the only one that thinks that show is totally disgusting?

Swingtown? Never heard of it.

I'm here, just reading up on the argument threads.

Had a talk with my brother, helped him change his oil by getting his car up on the lift. He talked about how PWC just doesn't seem like himself. LIke he's not there. Course, I already knew that from living with the Zombie during this last false recovery.

I struggle less and less with the divorce itself.