Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our discussion forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 5 of 26 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 25 26
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,513
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,513
My H is an unconfirmed WW (I'm still in the process of setting up more snooping); however, I believe that this qualifies:

Here is a text message exchange I discovered via snooping:


Quote:
From her to him--> 3/11: 6:35 p.m.: Hey baby miss you

His reply --> 3/14 10:22 p.m.: whats going pretty lady. I'll be in on 20 Mar for evening shift. whats happenin wit u


When I confronted him about it, the focus was my snooping (How dare you look through my messages!) and his explanation was that she was the girlfriend of a friend / co-worker and she just likes to play around "like that."

Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,513
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,513
OMG...I forgot to add that he also said

"Text messages are just words. There are no emotions behind them unless I am text messaging you or our child."

In response to me noting an uptick in text messages between him and a long time female friend.

Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 281
T
Member
Offline
Member
T
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 281
Yeah my WH said something similar. He said that the kids would adjust to a divorce and that our marriage has nothing to do with them. He also said that if he didn't want me that doesn't mean he wouldn't want the kids. huh??? How was that supposed to work considering I had MOVED to california with our kids to be with him for his new job and left my whole family in IOWA! If he divorced me I would move back to Iowa with the kids! So how could he have them? Another nice one was how he knew what my bad character was when he laid down and reproduced with me and now he's bound to me for life because of his bad choices. He also told me he wouldn't leave for the OW or anyone else but rather for himself. WOW.

Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 1,722
_
Member
Offline
Member
_
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 1,722
I've been told some hurtful ones but I'd rather not re-live them. As far as general craziness though, my WW said this:

"OM has absolutely nothing to do with our marriage problems."


-SOL
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 601
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 601
Originally Posted By: SickofLimbo
I've been told some hurtful ones but I'd rather not re-live them. As far as general craziness though, my WW said this:

"OM has absolutely nothing to do with our marriage problems."


Mine said that too! It happened to be the day after exWW had him listen in on phone counseling session between her and the marriage counselor.


Me BH 35 WW 36
Married 1998
DS 2002
DD 2005
D Day 1 7/28/08
D Day 2 8/19/08

Divorce Final 3/19/2009
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 307
A
Member
Offline
Member
A
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 307
A few of mine:

"I can't stand the fact I keeping hurting you. The only way I know to stop hurting you is to divorce"

"I can't stand to be around you because you smell like my dad (who abused her)"

"Our marriage will never work because your family resents what I have done"

"The OM is a lot like you. You would really like each other"

"I only married you so that I would no longer be a burden on my family"

and many, many more....


Me BH 40
Her XWW 34
Married 12 years

Feb 09 - PA #1 (w/married alcoholic)
Apr 09 - Started recovery, thought things were going well until...
Jan 10 - PA #2 (w/different guy on Facebook)
Dec 10 - Divorced
Now - very happy; no regrets
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 561
T
Member
Offline
Member
T
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 561
Originally Posted By: SickofLimbo
"OM has absolutely nothing to do with our marriage problems."


I've gotten that one a bunch too. So I reply, "then stop contacting him and lets work on our marital problems." To which she has no answer.


BH(Me)=40
WXW=38
ILYBNILWY: 8/09
DDAY: 8/31/09
Two boys: 8,7
Divorced 3/23/2011

Don't let your eyes refuse to see. Don't let your ears refuse to hear. Or you ain't never gonna shake this sense of sadness. --Ray Lamontagne
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 520
W
Member
Offline
Member
W
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 520
My H said to me and our marriage counselor, "It really didn't have anything to do with our marriage. I didn't do it at home. I did it at work."

HUH??????????


WH2LE

BS(Me)-57
FWH-54
Married-5/26/2001(2nd for me, 1st for him)
DS-30
DD-27
D-Day-05/31/2007
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 336
A
Member
Offline
Member
A
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 336
Originally Posted By: SickofLimbo
I've been told some hurtful ones but I'd rather not re-live them. As far as general craziness though, my WW said this:

"OM has absolutely nothing to do with our marriage problems."


I got that one... "OW has nothing to do with me wanting to leave you. I have for a long time."

Ok, then why are you afraid my lawyers will supena all of your emails and stuff? Hrm....? Why did you start ignoring me right after the A started and not before, hrm? Yeah. BS.

More.. "I only married you for security." Huh? He was in college finishing masters, I was just out of college in an ok but certainly not high-paying job.

My fav: "I never loved you." What the F ever. Fog, fog, fog.

Last edited by AnnaBelleRose; 04/02/10 05:41 PM. Reason: added more!

AnnaBelle Rose

Me: 29 WH:31 DS: 22mths M: almost 6 years, together 7 1/2
I am not a mistake. - ABR
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 336
A
Member
Offline
Member
A
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 336
oh, one more I remembered while reading another topic.

"I just wanted a friend."

Whaaa? I told WH he could have friends but he chose the wrong way for friendship! Then again, he's tried to tell me repeatedly they're just friends (who call/email/chat constantly?!?!). Stupid is NOT one of the tattoos I have.


AnnaBelle Rose

Me: 29 WH:31 DS: 22mths M: almost 6 years, together 7 1/2
I am not a mistake. - ABR
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 738
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 738
I have a great one to add here:

"I'm so angry at you for snooping into that private email account. I didn't want you knowing what was in there because I didn't want our relationship to be scarred any further in case of reconciliation."

Uh.....how about a) the fact that you were lying to me, THAT'S why you didn't want me getting in, and b) the relationship is much MORE scarred by the lies?

Another good one:

"I feel so sorry for you for the lot you've been given in life." dontknow Like he wasn't a part of hurting me, it was just my lot in life??? Gosh!


Me: BW, 27
Him: WH, 29
DD 4
DS 1
Married 07/25/09
A began end of 08/2009 (possibly sooner)
D-Day: 3/31/10
2nd D-Day: 4/9/2010
3rd D-Day: 4/21/10

Plan B (shortlived as it was): 18/05/10
WH decides to work on marriage: 20/05/10
False Recovery, Back to Plan B: 13/08/10

Filed for D Feb 2011, D April 2012

Looking forward to the sunshine and rainbows life should hold for us all!
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 738
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 738
Wait no....this one is even better....WH to me: "You're giving me an ulcer by all the problems you're causing!" faint


Me: BW, 27
Him: WH, 29
DD 4
DS 1
Married 07/25/09
A began end of 08/2009 (possibly sooner)
D-Day: 3/31/10
2nd D-Day: 4/9/2010
3rd D-Day: 4/21/10

Plan B (shortlived as it was): 18/05/10
WH decides to work on marriage: 20/05/10
False Recovery, Back to Plan B: 13/08/10

Filed for D Feb 2011, D April 2012

Looking forward to the sunshine and rainbows life should hold for us all!
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 860
T
Member
Offline
Member
T
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 860
Originally Posted By: SickofLimbo

"OM has absolutely nothing to do with our marriage problems."


Just for the record, I've heard Skatt shovel this on SEVERAL occasions.

And I cannot forget this little gem:

"I gave up on the M before I got involved with OM."

Oh really? Funny, I never got that "I'm giving up on the M" memo......

TB



Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 267
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 267
My ww said

"I'm getting my strength to leave you from him"


This one is just for fun from the opening mediation scene in Wedding Crashers

(in rage) "You shut your mouth when you're talking to me!" Cracks me up everytime I say it.



God's goal for marriage: Become ONE! How? MBer methods.
Me:husband 42
wife, 40
married 1/12/1991
3 children, 1 granddaughter
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Quote:
(in rage) "You shut your mouth when you're talking to me!"


I often find myself saying to my kids, "Don't chew with your mouth full." DUH, I think I meant TALK. HAHAHAHAHA

Yeppers, "OW has NOTHING to do with OUR problems, that is between you and ME." and POSOW. tehheee


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 336
A
Member
Offline
Member
A
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 336
Originally Posted By: Scotland

Yeppers, "OW has NOTHING to do with OUR problems, that is between you and ME." and POSOW. tehheee


And POSOW isn't a part of the problem? Uh hello! twoxfour I got something along those lines too..


AnnaBelle Rose

Me: 29 WH:31 DS: 22mths M: almost 6 years, together 7 1/2
I am not a mistake. - ABR
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 217
D
Member
Offline
Member
D
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 217
"She makes me feel alive".
puke


Me: BW, 46
Him: WH, 48
EA/PA with co-worker 8-08 to 7-09
D-day 7-29
NC 8-17
OW and WH both fired from jobs
OW lost court case for restraining order- judge called her a "practiced deciever" who manufactured evidence!!
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 537
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 537
Originally Posted By: PregnantandHurt
Wait no....this one is even better....WH to me: "You're giving me an ulcer by all the problems you're causing!" faint


OMG .... lol i busted up laughing at this my XH told me that i caused his diverticulitis and subsequent surgery....lol... couldn't be the stress of his affair doing it to him.... doh2


Truth can stand on it's own two feet....A lie needs support....FRM
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 11
T
Junior Member
Offline
Junior Member
T
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 11
"If you knew him (OM), you would realize he does many wonderful things for other families."

Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 11
T
Junior Member
Offline
Junior Member
T
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 11
"Why would you tell their (OMs) wives and go an create problems in their marriages? They don't deserve this."

Page 5 of 26 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 25 26

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
1 members (1 invisible), 28 guests, and 43 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Mwid, Shepherd, alg, Pelican89, SRL
71,672 Registered Users
Forum Statistics
Forums67
Topics133,526
Posts2,322,544
Members71,673
Most Online3,185
Jan 27th, 2020
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2020, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.  |  Web Development by SunStar Media.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5