When do I confront him and her? Before or after? I am going to expose tonight.
Also he's gong to be mad. He's going to think I'm mad. Which I am but not so mad I want to end the marriage over it. How to I make him understand I still want to be together. He's not going to want to be around me I'm sure. Thiis may give him his push to get an apt.if he didn't do that already. Haven't talked to him since he didn't come home last night.
To whom are you going to expose? This needs to be done in a very methodical way, with NO WARNING TO THE AFFAIREES BEFOREHAND.
Exposure Targets:
Siblings of WH/OW
Parents of same
Employers if they are co-workers
Pastor
Aunts/Uncles/Cousins
All FB friends
Email address book
Any contacts in his cell phone
Bottom line: Expose to anyone you think will put pressure on the adulterers to end the A. You do it all at once, not one person this day, another person that day.
You need to have a set 'spiel,' be it in letter or spoken, to the effect of:
I have horrible news - WH is having an A with POSOW. I have gathered evidence of the A. I love my H and I need your help in ending this awful affair. They have been together since X date. I have evidence of the affair if you wish to see it.
I know some other posters have samples of written exposure letters to fit the audience, whether it is for FB, family or work. Hopefully they can jump in here and show you some examples of what to say.
Do not trickle the exposure out - word will leak out to the infidels and they will have time to spin the story, to-wit: "Mom, I've got to tell you - remember that guy I met not too long ago? Well, his wife has been going off the deep end lately and I've been trying to be a supportive friend to him. Now she's found out that he's been talking to me, and she's running around like a lunatic, telling everyone we're having an affair! Can you imagine!?"
Nuclear exposure. All at once, before they know what hit them.