I took my 4 year old DD to the doctor for a run-of-the-mill upper respiratory infection. The Dr. did the normal peering into the ears, eyes, throat and, lastly, the nose. After the nose, DD asks "Did you see the web?"

Dr. looks at me oddly, "The what?" DD repeats "The web!"

I shrug, totally bewildered....??

DD then says, "well Mommy always says I have buggies (boogies) up there, why can't you see the webs?"

Needless to say, Dr. and I were practically on the floor laughing and DD was now the one completely bewildered.

My mother noticed that my 5 year old sister was standing at the doorway of an empty mens room. When mom went to cart her away, my sister pointed to the urinals on the wall and asked what they were. Not ready for an explanation of male anatomy my mother said, "Oh those; they're for ladies with sore backs"

When I was a child we lived in a neighborhood where few people owned dryers or had fences. Clothes were dried on clothes lines in backyards.

There were no leash laws either. Our dog would steal clothes from back yards and bring them home. Since we had no idea where they came from, my mother would make us wear them if they fit.

Its odd to have a wardrobe chosen by your dog.

A few years ago one of our family dogs died. We had a ceremony in the back yard and buried him there.

A few months later my daughter was having a sleep over in our den. There was a sliding glass door to the back yard.

Our other dog 'bear' used to love showing off things he'd found. He may have been the first dog in canine history to actually catch a squirrel. He proudly tossed it in the air for a few days.

As night was approaching, I heard these blood curdling screams from the sleep over in the den. I ran down there to find bear at the door, wanting in, having dug up and dragged the other dog with him.

I had to apologize to several parents the next morning.

I like these stories.

ok new one this just happened today wife took me and the kids out to eat for fathers day.

we always joke around with my daughter she is 18 months old when we are cooking dinner we will take one of her plastic forks and poke her on the butt and say yep she is done.

well while we are eating the waitress is seating a group at the table next to ours and getting thier drink order my daughter took her fork poked the waitres in the butt and yelled for everyone to hear that the waitress was done.

of course we were embarased and laughing at the same time so i guess our little joke with her is going to have to stop now cant have her poking people at random with forks proclaiming they are done and ready to eat lol

Adorable!

That is hilarious!!

Today, my 4 year old boy came flying into the room with his hands on his hips. "Excuse me," he announced in as booming of a voice as he could muster, "I am your hero. I am here to rescue a woman."

Chivalry ain't dead yet, folks!

Holy hot mustard!
How cute is your son Prisca?
Our son used to "fly" wearing one of my cotton dishtowels as a cape.
Now he's wearing full Army battle rattle.

Gotta share this insight from my five-year-old niece:

She's walking around this afternoon repeating 'Plan B, Plan B' to herself (Such big ears, she was in the other part of the house)

I stop her and say 'Sweetheart, what are you talking about? what is Plan B?"

She says: "It is about saving somebody".

Me: "Saving somebody from what?"

Her: "A giant killer hedgehog!"

Make of that what you will.....

Bump

Just a quirky thing I thought of this morning.

My three year old is cleaning the tables with babywipes. She has a Crayola Green Marker in her one hand.

She says to me, "Mommy, go on your computer."

Me: "Why?"

DD: "Just do Mommy."

Me: "DD are you wanting me to leave the room so you can use that green marker to draw on my table?"

DD: with a huge grin, "Yes"

Me: "Thanks for not lying, but you know we don't draw on the tables, let me get you some paper."


The jist of the story is kids learn at a very early age how to do things in secrecy when they know they shouldn't. How many BS come here and are scared to EXPOSE? Don't they get it the waywards learned at a very young age that doing stuff in secrecy is the only way bad behavior can happen.

Me: "DD, did you just write on that table when I went to get you paper?"

DD: "Yes"

Me: "Okay - give me the marker, the TV is off and you need to clean it up and sit in the corner for 5 minutes."

DD: Screaming - Crying and now throwing a temper tantrum.

Amazing how this resembles EXPOSURE!!!

Tough~

My daughter (to my 3-yr old grandson): "Why are you upset?"

Grandson: "because you broke my heart and now Jesus is gonna fall out."

McDonalds Man: which McFlurry would you like?
Husband: Coookie Crumble (( cooooooookie crumble- local accent(up north) turns "oo" into "oo", like in boot))
DS5: He means cookie crumble - he's from Stoke

That made me laugh Staytogether.

My dd7 when she was 6 asked me in all honesty "Mummy, why do normal people say 'I don't like it.' but my cousins say 'Ah doht laahke it!' (They're from Rochdale which for US people is about an hour away from Stoke).

What's stoke?

You talkin bout Vermont?
Hornpout and a costle of milk?
I'm sorry I mean, "two quart costle" of milk?
Forgot a lot of the G rated Vermont sayings, and most of the others too lol