Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 22 of 47 1 2 20 21 22 23 24 46 47
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
M
Member
OP Offline
Member
M
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
Originally Posted by marksaysay
Had an interview today for the second job I need to pay for the continued divorce/custody ordeal. Could start as soon as Saturday.

Another update:

I got the job. They called me back about an hour later telling me I can start on the 10th. Yeah!!!


BS - Me 36
WS - wife 34
Married 10 yrs
DDay - Early November 2010
WS filed Divorce 11/9/10
Divorce final 12/22/11

1 Corinthians 13:7: (LOVE) Beareth all things, believeth all things, HOPETH all things, endureth all things.
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 592
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 592
Congrats Mark, at least it will keep you busy and great job on getting the lawyer involved. I know you don't want the D, I'm sorry that you have to deal with all of it. Fight for your DD.


Aka S2

I know what's next. I filed for D. Original betrayal and two FR's in one year. I'm done.

A sure way to lose happiness, I found, is to want it at the expense of everything else.

Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,708
R
Member
Offline
Member
R
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,708
Congrats on the job!

Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,820
J
Member
Offline
Member
J
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,820
happy for you, hope all goes better for you, baby steps, day by day


BW 56
WH 57
Married 25 years, live together for 2, dated 2 years before that.....
DS 23, DS 25
D-Day Nov 23/09
NC Mar 1/10
Working on Recovery
Grateful for finding Marriage Builders
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
M
Member
OP Offline
Member
M
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
So after getting the job on Monday, I woke up to a car that wouldn't start. It didnt bother me, though. After all I've been through, not much bothers me anymore.

One thing I've recognized is that God is using my circumstances to prepare me for something down the road. It's OKAY!!!


BS - Me 36
WS - wife 34
Married 10 yrs
DDay - Early November 2010
WS filed Divorce 11/9/10
Divorce final 12/22/11

1 Corinthians 13:7: (LOVE) Beareth all things, believeth all things, HOPETH all things, endureth all things.
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
M
Member
OP Offline
Member
M
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
Went to orientation for my new/old job (I worked there 10 years ago). I start my first shift a week from Thursday. I'm so ready.

Still moving forward....


BS - Me 36
WS - wife 34
Married 10 yrs
DDay - Early November 2010
WS filed Divorce 11/9/10
Divorce final 12/22/11

1 Corinthians 13:7: (LOVE) Beareth all things, believeth all things, HOPETH all things, endureth all things.
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
M
Member
OP Offline
Member
M
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
Originally Posted by marksaysay
Went to orientation for my new/old job (I worked there 10 years ago). I start my first shift a week from Thursday. I'm so ready.

Still moving forward....

After this, I had a flat tire and just laughed it off. Nothing really bothers me much anymore. God is still in control.


BS - Me 36
WS - wife 34
Married 10 yrs
DDay - Early November 2010
WS filed Divorce 11/9/10
Divorce final 12/22/11

1 Corinthians 13:7: (LOVE) Beareth all things, believeth all things, HOPETH all things, endureth all things.
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
M
Member
OP Offline
Member
M
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the ILYBNILWY speech and the day we separated. I honestly never thought it would make a few months, let alone a year.

It's funny because right now there is no sadness or anything related to it. It's just another day that approaches. I guess that means I've really made some progress.

Just gotta keep moving....


BS - Me 36
WS - wife 34
Married 10 yrs
DDay - Early November 2010
WS filed Divorce 11/9/10
Divorce final 12/22/11

1 Corinthians 13:7: (LOVE) Beareth all things, believeth all things, HOPETH all things, endureth all things.
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
M
Member
OP Offline
Member
M
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
I have a question for you vets. It has been stated over and over that ws's make horrible parents. I can't say I don't disagree but how do you use that to get the kids? Many states like Indiana don't factor in moral shortcomings in divorce and custody battles.


BS - Me 36
WS - wife 34
Married 10 yrs
DDay - Early November 2010
WS filed Divorce 11/9/10
Divorce final 12/22/11

1 Corinthians 13:7: (LOVE) Beareth all things, believeth all things, HOPETH all things, endureth all things.
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 2,495
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 2,495
Originally Posted by marksaysay
I have a question for you vets. It has been stated over and over that ws's make horrible parents. I can't say I don't disagree but how do you use that to get the kids? Many states like Indiana don't factor in moral shortcomings in divorce and custody battles.

What you need to demonstrate are actions that are detrimental to your child. Can you make a list of things she is doing that may be harmful?

CV


Celtic Voyager
Married 22+ years
3 young adult children


"A story of me"
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
M
Member
OP Offline
Member
M
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
The things I can think of right now are:

Bringing OM around daughter during divorce
Multiple threats to keep DD away when she doesn't get her way (documented)
Abandoning the vow of teaching DD Christian principles which could cause confusion living in 2 households (daughter was dedicated at 6mos and WW no longer goes to church)
Alienating DD from godparents who know of her actions and don't agree (they are also our pastor and his wife)
Alienation from dd's other grandmother (older woman who cared for our daughter til she was about 3 and has a close relationship with her).
Multiple reports of DD not having hair done from some that include her family (WW never used to let DD go without her hair being well taken care of

What other things are there? What else could I use to prove her actions are detrimental if moral lapse is not considered?

Last edited by marksaysay; 10/03/11 11:36 AM.

BS - Me 36
WS - wife 34
Married 10 yrs
DDay - Early November 2010
WS filed Divorce 11/9/10
Divorce final 12/22/11

1 Corinthians 13:7: (LOVE) Beareth all things, believeth all things, HOPETH all things, endureth all things.
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
M
Member
OP Offline
Member
M
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
Update (kinda):

I know you all are going to hit me with 2x4's but a concerned family member of WW told me that just last night, WW posted pics of her and OM AND pics of DD in her underwear on FB. The first pics don't bother me but the second ones do, greatly.


BS - Me 36
WS - wife 34
Married 10 yrs
DDay - Early November 2010
WS filed Divorce 11/9/10
Divorce final 12/22/11

1 Corinthians 13:7: (LOVE) Beareth all things, believeth all things, HOPETH all things, endureth all things.
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,179
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,179
Call the police. Make a report.

Get screenshots asap and give them to your attorney.

You will only get a 2x4 from me if you fail to follow through on this. Don't contact WW directly, either. Let your lawyer and law enforcement do anything that needs doing.


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 1,026
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 1,026
screen shots, immediately! And down load the pictures as proof!


Me BW (37)
WH (37)
DD1 6 yrs DD2 2 yr

A man who abandons his wife and children because of his infidelity is no price. I can do better then that, I deserve better then that.

The difficulties and struggles of today are but the price we must pay for the accomplishments and victories of tomorrow

Men must be honest with themselves before they can be honest with others. A man who is not honest with himself presents a hopeless case
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818
Likes: 7
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818
Likes: 7
I wonder if it would also help to round up a couple witnesses to see the page on FB for themselves so they can testify to it later.


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,179
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,179
Anything and everything! This girl is SEVEN YEARS OLD in her skivvies online!!!!!!!!!


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
M
Member
OP Offline
Member
M
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
Lawyer was contacted but wasn't in. I spoke with paralegal and told her. She said she didn't know what could be done but thought that I would have to have proof. I told her I wasn't a friend so I couldn't get the pics. She said I should someone who's her friend do it.

I called her stepmom, who was the one who told me about the pics, but she said that she would have to think about it and to call her back tomorrow.

I'm waiting for someone who goes to our church and is still her friend to call me back. Other than him, I don't know anyone else and I don't know what else I can do.

Also, during the conversation where the pics were brought up, stepmom told me wife called her dad discussing my fight for custody. She said her dad, who I exposed to way at the beginning and has said she deserves to be happy, told her rather bluntly that she needed to leave these guys alone and stay her a@@ at home. It seems that he now understands the gravity of what's going on with his daughter now. I tried to tell him months ago but he turned a blind eye to it.


BS - Me 36
WS - wife 34
Married 10 yrs
DDay - Early November 2010
WS filed Divorce 11/9/10
Divorce final 12/22/11

1 Corinthians 13:7: (LOVE) Beareth all things, believeth all things, HOPETH all things, endureth all things.
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 11,650
I
Member
Offline
Member
I
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 11,650
Can you try the fake account, friending someone whose her friend and keep going till you get in?

Theres a description of how to do it somewhere on here, though not sure how long it takes


What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
M
Member
OP Offline
Member
M
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 637
The crazy thing about it all is that my ww is a social worker. But I guess the most pertinent piece of info is that she is a wayward...that says it all.

And yes, I tried it months ago but after going into Plan B, I stopped trying to get access. I'm not so sure if I can get in...


BS - Me 36
WS - wife 34
Married 10 yrs
DDay - Early November 2010
WS filed Divorce 11/9/10
Divorce final 12/22/11

1 Corinthians 13:7: (LOVE) Beareth all things, believeth all things, HOPETH all things, endureth all things.
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 2,495
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 2,495
Originally Posted by marksaysay
The crazy thing about it all is that my ww is a social worker. But I guess the most pertinent piece of info is that she is a wayward...that says it all.

And yes, I tried it months ago but after going into Plan B, I stopped trying to get access. I'm not so sure if I can get in...

Mark, I tried. I can't.. Besides, I think she knows my real name.

CV


Celtic Voyager
Married 22+ years
3 young adult children


"A story of me"
Page 22 of 47 1 2 20 21 22 23 24 46 47

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
1 members (1 invisible), 893 guests, and 48 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Bibbyryan860, Ian T, SadNewYorker, Jay Handlooms, GrenHeil
71,838 Registered Users
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2019, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5