Okay... hold on...

AI has just informed me that my labeling of the 60+ "emotional" affairs is incorrect. We'll look at the account again, but it's looking like the majority weren't EA's, but we're instead inappropriate dealings and a severe show of my lack of disrespect and ***EDIT*** boundaries.

It's still very much no excuse.

You are right; it's not.

Basically, you have not been married to AlmostInvictus. You've lived like a single man, freely courting and hooking up as you pleased.

The question now is, do you want to start a REAL marriage with this woman, if she wants to be married to you?

Yes.

TRT. I pray that you are not resorting to that age old tactic of creating a "diversion" by burying the other guy in a huge pile of paperwork.

The poly will detect any deception on your part.

This could very well be your last chance to remember anything you forgot.

Got it. I'm rock solid, pokerface.
Reformatting my laptop for the impending sale.
Grabbing my DVDs and throwing them in bags.
Gonna pay for this poly myself.

Hey alis,


I'm sure you understand that I have the right to answer who I want, but let's do this. Throw down. What've you got? I'm an open book to you.

Also, read my thread again. AI is the one who told me that I made a mistake in the labeling of all of my affairs. 60+, in her opinion, is misleading.

Ask away. I'm yours.

No defensiveness. That's good TRT. I really do hope you prove me wrong.

It's not just me TRT, other users have made the same comments, and are no longer posting in your thread.

You'll notice that I had nothing further to really say to you, instead offered advice and support to your wife instead (the quote that TRT has made of me, just for other's information, is from AI's thread - not this one).

I simply don't believe a single word that you type, after all, you've been lying over and over and over again, so to me, your "open book" might as well be Harry Potter.

WHOA -- wait!

Is there anything on there that AlmostInvictus needs to see?

Both my FWH and I posted to you and got either no response or you skirted around the main points. I don't mind though it's your choice to reply or ignore just know that in the spirit of your newly found honesty it doesent add up.

If it quacks like a duck and walks like a duck it's still a duck.

As far as I am concerned I have yet to see anything significant to show that you are changing or becoming honest but I'm also lucky enough that I don't have to be married to you so my energy is going into helping AL who clearly wants and needs the help from everyone and isn't as selective as you.

Good luck with whatever choices you make next.

Nope. We went through it together. This laptop is a trigger for her, anyways.
I moved all of the stuff that we might need to the joint computer.

Thanks. I don't mean to ignore. I just think that I could either sit here and answer to the folks on the board one by one, or I could talk to my wife and try to show her I'm serious about this.

The choice is easy.

But when this all settles down, one way or another, I will bust my a$$ to answer you all. Your FWH's post to me was a great one. I read and have read everything on here. It's just a matter of who I respond to that remains in question.

That's cool, Alis. I totally understand your stance.
When I prove myself to my wife (first), myself (second), and the y'all (third), I'm sure the sitch will change.

I do har to say, whether you believe it or not, your constant badgering and obnoxious attacking had kept this all at the forefront of my mind. As much as I want to AO all over the place, you're helping keep me in check. I appreciate it.

And I appreciate the help you're all giving AI.

I'm actually glad she asked me to start posting here.

Hi TRT

Like everyone else on these boards, I'm rooting for a successful Poly result and the start of an MB success story, if that's what AI wants.

But please try to avoid using the day of the poly, or even the hour before, as the 'deadline' for honesty, as so many waywards do, certainly ones with a SSL and a history of trickle truthing, as you do.

Do it today. If not AI will always remember these days, days when she needed you desperately, as days that you were still lying to her.

Each day of lies is an extra few months of healing from wounds for the betrayed.

I hope desperately that you already have come clean, but search your heart to make sure NOTHING is hidden.

It would torpedo your chances.

I still class the 'days of lies' as way more offensive than anything the two wayturds did when they were alone together.

I don't have flashbacks about what I know they did. But the memory of the lies I was told by them both is torturous.

It ends today. This very hour.

Anything less is an insult.

Ok.

I hear ya, indie.
AI has asked me to refrain from saying anything like "I'm clean" or "I've told you/her everything". I'm respecting her wish by not saying these things.

What she didn't ask me not to say is this:

I. Will. Pass. That. Poly.

And then I'll build a man that she can weather any storm with.

End of story.

Thank you for keeping me in check, indie. I look forward to future dealings with you and all of the folks here.

I'll tell you one thing for nothing: your swearing gets right on my ****. I wish you'd show a bit of respect to this board and drop it.

It also feeds your anger. If you're truly sincere about recovering with your wife, you will stop it.

Okay. Point taken. I'll keep my aggressive vernacular to myself.