Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 7 of 11 1 2 5 6 7 8 9 10 11
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
Sorry I checked and the logger name was not on the statement.

Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
I am able to see the screenshots being emailed to me again with the paid logger. They are clean and I'll be back as soon as I notice anything wayward.
In the mean time would Plan B be appropriate for next weeks?

Last edited by Wearld; 02/04/13 09:55 PM.
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,479
Likes: 6
B
Member
Member
B Offline
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,479
Likes: 6
Originally Posted by Wearld
I am able to see the screenshots being emailed to me again with the paid logger. They are clean and I'll be back as soon as I notice anything wayward.
In the mean time would Plan B be appropriate for next weeks?
Are you back home?

Did you write the Harleys?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
No BH I'm still at my parents. He hasn't contacted yesterday evening either, just on the computer after coming back from his brother's. some YouTube sad songs, news n award shows.
His still kept the place such a mess. This is weekday #3 not including the weekend here.


Harley's had mentioned about his honesty needed in relation.

Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,788
Likes: 2
L
Member
Member
L Offline
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,788
Likes: 2
Wearld you are going around in circles. You are not going to catch him cheating by watching the keylogger if he knows that you installed this. Do you want to find out what he is doing or have you decided that it does not matter?

If it does not matter, what are you going to do about your marriage?

If it does matter, what are you doing to do to find out what he is up to?


Last edited by living_well; 02/05/13 11:38 AM.

3 adult children
Divorced - he was a serial adulterer
Now remarried, thank you MB
(formerly lied_to_again)
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
living_well
I'll have to do all the talking and put the conditions. I don't want to contact him. I cannot or dont want to put up with him.

Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
I can't figure out what I want. No one wants abuse but I don't feel courageous enough to do all the talking.
Today when he didn't show up at the apartment till 7pm, I called his mother and she said he left at 4.30pm. Maybe he's been at library.
The verbal abuse has started, I was sitting in the bedroom and he comes next to the bed and says what are you doing here.
Even this phone feels has a logger.

Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
The update is I'm feeling better this week. I spent last 2 nights at the apartment. He didnt bring up anything. If I bring it up then I wud be putting conditions he doesnt care about.
I waited all last week and finally on Friday texted his brother that i dont know where he is after he leaves their place and he's talking to women online. I'm sure the brothers spoke and I was told I should talk to him. But again, now if I bring it up they are my conditions or ill be ignoring the problems.
Im unable to get access to his phone.
Any advice? Should there be communication yet?

Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,479
Likes: 6
B
Member
Member
B Offline
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,479
Likes: 6
Originally Posted by Wearld
The update is I'm feeling better this week. I spent last 2 nights at the apartment. He didnt bring up anything. If I bring it up then I wud be putting conditions he doesnt care about.
I waited all last week and finally on Friday texted his brother that i dont know where he is after he leaves their place and he's talking to women online. I'm sure the brothers spoke and I was told I should talk to him. But again, now if I bring it up they are my conditions or ill be ignoring the problems.
Im unable to get access to his phone.
Any advice? Should there be communication yet?
I'm confused.

Is he staying with you at the apartment?

Are you not talking to him?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
Yes he's at the apartment and neither of us r talking. He's on the couch still and continues to keep the place a mess. This is how the conflicts happen, unless I let it go and start hanging out in the living room. This time is different after I know what he did.

Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,788
Likes: 2
L
Member
Member
L Offline
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,788
Likes: 2
But you don't know what he did do you? You never followed through on finding out what he was up to.

Neither did you impose any conditions on him for returning. What happened to plan B?


3 adult children
Divorced - he was a serial adulterer
Now remarried, thank you MB
(formerly lied_to_again)
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
living_well I'm thinking I'll have to retry later once if i have access to his phone to find out more on wt he's up to.
The only time i had a chance to state any conditions was the day after i left the apartment for the first time. At the time i had lost it and it was too soon for me realize that it is even fixable.

But his current attitude, im still not sure of. I drove by the apartment, got a few of my things and without a gps he was enjoying me calling his brother's place twice last week to ask if they knew where he was.
I spent the evenings of the weekend at the apartment to see if he's home. I did state to him that he needs to clean his mess there and this is pretty much how conflicts are. I dont think i take or get a chance to state the conditions.

Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
BH I posted about the desktopshark on the other forum. Just wanted to make sure u saw it.

Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,479
Likes: 6
B
Member
Member
B Offline
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,479
Likes: 6
Did you ever hear back from support? Can you call their 1-800 number?



FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
Didn't hear back from them via email. Their website doesn't seem to have a support phone #.

Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
BH back up working again. I re-tried when i got to the computer today. Must be a problem at their end over the weekend.

Thanks to living_well to remind me to keep strong on Plan B. I want change and will keep calm. Found radio shack around here today.

Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,479
Likes: 6
B
Member
Member
B Offline
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,479
Likes: 6
Originally Posted by Wearld
BH back up working again. I re-tried when i got to the computer today. Must be a problem at their end over the weekend.

Thanks to living_well to remind me to keep strong on Plan B. I want change and will keep calm. Found radio shack around here today.
To be in Plan B, you must be not living together.

Right now you're in Plan A while you're snooping and gathering evidence.

Can you be like Mrs. James Bond while you're snooping? Dr. Harley only recommends 3 weeks in Plan A for women. You need to find out what is going on.

Carrot and Stick of Plan A


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
I'm not fast enough cause there was a screen shot with him in the logger's installation folder. Emails have stopped.
If I dont find anything by end of this week it means i'll have to talk to my parents instead of working on this myself. If I am snooping and in plan A, shall i just go stay at the apartment?

Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
Unlike as I had hoped that I'm not one bring up a conversation, I had to via text. There is no sense of agreement in this conflict. How do I turn this around without acting as if there is no problem?

Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 110
I've been back at the apartment. My parents are not supportive and there is still some care. We talked briefly and he said he was chatting only when he saw the logger installed.

As of now, I know how to make deposit units in the bank. Although he shows care only in preparing food. I'm with him all day for the next 3 weeks as we are his brother's during the day to take care of the kids. He seems sexually distant since day before yesterday.
I can't leave now and don't know how to talk about this. Things were so much natural while dating.

Page 7 of 11 1 2 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 1,361 guests, and 92 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Zion9038xe, renki, Gocroswell, Allen Inverson, Logan bauer
72,026 Registered Users
Latest Posts
Annulment reconsideration help
by abrrba - 07/21/25 03:05 PM
Help: I Don't Like Being Around My Wife
by abrrba - 07/21/25 03:01 PM
How important is it to get the whole story?
by leemc - 07/18/25 10:58 AM
Following Ex-Wifes Nursing Schedule?
by Roger Beach - 07/16/25 04:21 AM
My wife wants a separation
by Roger Beach - 07/16/25 04:20 AM
Spying husband arrested
by coooper - 06/24/25 09:19 AM
Forum Statistics
Forums67
Topics133,624
Posts2,323,522
Members72,026
Most Online6,102
Jul 3rd, 2025
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 2025, Marriage Builders, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 8.0.0