Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 1
S
Junior Member
OP Offline
Junior Member
S
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 1
Prior to my husbands deployment I discovered he had an emotional affair with a co-worker. Only to leave a week later for 7 months. After a couple months into his return I learned he had had multiple affairs one with my best friend and he still had feelings for his co-worker.

Tonight he told me he was leaving and had chosen to leave me for his co-worker. I was not surprised however I was devastated. After we ate dinner in silence and he put our 4 yr old to bed he left with bags in hand.

He told me he is so sorry for hurting me and believes I don't deserve him. That we have far too much baggage and he wants a fresh start.

I'm terrified, mad, hurt and most of all...I feel I worked so hard for the 10 years of our relationship only for him to give up so suddenly. I would gladly take him back. I have begged for counseling. I purchased His Needs and Her Needs and Love Busters. All to never be opened.

What do I do!?

Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,433
Likes: 4
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,433
Likes: 4
Originally Posted by scalaniz1980
Prior to my husbands deployment I discovered he had an emotional affair with a co-worker. Only to leave a week later for 7 months. After a couple months into his return I learned he had had multiple affairs one with my best friend and he still had feelings for his co-worker.

Tonight he told me he was leaving and had chosen to leave me for his co-worker. I was not surprised however I was devastated. After we ate dinner in silence and he put our 4 yr old to bed he left with bags in hand.

He told me he is so sorry for hurting me and believes I don't deserve him. That we have far too much baggage and he wants a fresh start.

I'm terrified, mad, hurt and most of all...I feel I worked so hard for the 10 years of our relationship only for him to give up so suddenly. I would gladly take him back. I have begged for counseling. I purchased His Needs and Her Needs and Love Busters. All to never be opened.

What do I do!?
Welcome to MB and so sorry for your pain.

Have you exposed this? Were any of the OW in the military?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 1,956
Likes: 1
L
Member
Offline
Member
L
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 1,956
Likes: 1
Get the book "Surviving an Affair" by Dr. Harley as soon as possible and follow the steps. It will be your best chance at saving your marriage.

This should be exposed to the leaders in your H's chain of command. The military is very concerned about the state of marriages in their ranks.

Also, do you have a chaplain? Some of them have been working with Dr. Harley on saving marriages and could be a great support.

Read this thread about exposure: Exposure 101

You should ask the mods to move your thread to the Surviving an Affair forum. You will get a lot of help there.


Married 1980
DDay Nov 2010

Recovered thanks to Marriage Builders

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 1,079 guests, and 45 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Mike69, petercgeelan, Zorya, Reyna98, Nofoguy
71,829 Registered Users
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2019, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5